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Mario Bros.: Difference between revisions
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imported>Cjaymarch84 (Created page with "Does anyone remember the Mario Bros.? The little known couplet of children’s mascots began as a character named Plumber Jack who battled the evil five-toed gorilla Mule Kong...") |
imported>SOMEGUY123 mNo edit summary |
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I was sitting at home playing my favorite game boy and game girl games when I found the old Sness. I dusted that motherfucker off and popped in a strange cart that had appear by my doorway that was left by a sinister one-eyed man who looked like Dennis Hopper from Speed with spiked tipped hair.
At first I was confused because the cart was all torn up and Mario looked like he was crying on the cover. He looked like a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming Lee after her cervix had been removed. My phone rang. It was my supervisor, God. He told me that I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing and insisted that I follow along with my genetic program he had set up for me. I refused and he told me that I was going to burn in the fires of hell for all eternity, I told him we all end up burning like that, like toast, it wouldn’t matter if he or something else burned me, I just wasn’t afraid anymore.
I took my meds for schizophrenia and started jacking off on the couch. Then I remembered there was a game I was supposed to be playing. I called for my dog, Fido, but then realized he didn’t exist, and a strange man in green suspenders brought me my shoes. His name was Luigi and he was our Italian gardener/plumber/pizza preparer. I asked him to make me a pizza but he didn’t wash his hands after using the toilet and there was shit all over the pizza. I threw it, and him in the garbage, when he told me that I couldn’t do this to a man and he abruptly quit, throwing his suspenders in the garbage and walking naked down the street.
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I woke up, then, in the toilet. I opened my eyes and brushed the urine out of my eyes and looked out at the world. I was sad, so I could only see the world through a sad lens, but I could see the world. And though I had only been in the toilet for about sixty seconds, it had felt as though aeons had passed. Like a dream.
<h2>Video</h2>
[[Video:CREEPYPASTA Mario Bros.|left]]
[[Category:Vidya games]]
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