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imported>Kerbin (Created page with "So we all know Spongebob, right? The little yellow sponge who's always laughing, smiling, annoying his neighbor, and just all-around being a goofy character with a starfish by...") |
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So we all know
Well now that we have the introduction all settled I'd like to let you all know that I have, or rather HAD, a very rare copy of a Spongebob episode written by none other than Steven Hillenburg. While roaming Nickelodeon studios in June of 2008, let me tell you, that the tickets to get in were NOT easy to get… Anyway, I ran into Mr. Hillenburg in one of the main areas of the studio. No literally. I ran into him. See… I kind of snuck into a high security area and well… I ended up alerting guards and… You get the gist. After bumping into him, I apologized. Mr. Hillenburg looked as though he was in a daze. I waved my hand in front of him but he continued onward past me. This made me a little uneasy. Once he walked away I spotted something on the ground where I had bumped into Hillenburg.▼
It was a video tape. It didn't have anything of discernible title nor of anything remotely close to what the video was about. No sticker, nothing on the inside of the film protector, anything. I picked it up and ran very quickly out of the lot. About a week later after my initial journey by plane back to Chicago, I remembered that I still had the tape. Seeing as I had a VHS to DVD burner that I got for Christmas last year I decided to get a blank DVD-R disc and put it into the DVD side of the burner and the video inside of the VHS side. After about 30 minutes or so it popped out the disc and video. I think that's what they're supposed to do when a disc is done burning… Anyway, I popped the DVD into my computer, autoplay popped up of course because I had modified my computer to do so, I decided to look in the folder for it. There was a movie file that went by the name of “Pearl.avi”. …Pearl? I then double clicked the movie file as Windows Media Center popped up. "ARE YOU READY KIDS??" "AYE AYE CAPTAIN!", it was a Spongebob episode! I thought to myself "Ooh! I haven't seen this show in so long!". Spongebob was one of my favorite shows as a 10 year old and hearing the nasally laughter of the sponge would make my ears absolutely sing with joy… Well metaphorically of course… So as the title of the episode came up I noticed something odd… There was no title to the episode. It just skipped right into the episode.▼
It showed the three things I knew and loved about Spongebob, the three main houses. The pineapple, the Easter Island head, and the rock with an antenna on it. I smiled with nostalgia as I heard Spongebob's laughter echoing through the computer speakers. Spongebob was watching a TV show on his little diver helmet TV. About 5 seconds after the scene transitioned into Spongebob's house, Pearl, Mr. Krabs daughter, bursts through Spongebob's door, breaking the door down as she does so. She is seen sobbing hysterically in a comedic manner, you know, mini waterfalls coming out of her eyes. Spongebob begins to walk over and ask Pearl "What's wrong?". Pearl replies, "Oh Spongebob! It's terrible! Daddy won't talk to me! He hasn't said a single word to me all day! He just sits in his bedroom looking down at the floor sighing…". Spongebob replies back to her in a bit of a heroic way, "Mr. Krabs? That seems weird… Don't worry Pearl! I'll go talk to him!". "You will, Spongebob?" Pearl replies with a looking of happiness on her face. Spongebob then nods. Pearl is seen hugging Spongebob and saying, "Thanks Spongebob! You're the coolest!".▼
▲Well now that we have the introduction all settled I'd like to let you all know that I have, or rather HAD, a very rare copy of a
The screen transitions with bubbles coming up to Spongebob nearing the giant anchor that Mr. Krabs and Pearl live in saying, "Cool, huh? Ch-Cha!" and you hear a Jazz trumpet chorus playing a chord as Spongebob is seen doing a comedically cool stance and look. He then knocks on Mr. Krabs' door. We then see Mr. Krabs' claw quickly grab Spongebob and pull him into his home. "Spongebob me boy. Ah'm glad yer here. I have ter tell yer somethin'.". "What is it, Mr. Krabs?", Spongebob asks. "It's… It's about Pearl… You see she's… She's…". Spongebob, confused by Mr. Krabs' stammering asks, "She's what, Mr. Krabs?". A grim look comes upon Mr. Krabs' face, "She's… adopted, me boy…". Spongebob gasps "ADOPTED?!". A claw grabs Spongebob's lips as they're seen being comedically stretched forward. "SHH! She might be out there listenin'! Now me boyo… I want you to tell her she is adopted… I… I can't do it…", tears begin to well up in Mr. Krabs' eyes, "I just can't…". Spongebob looks shocked at this, "B-but Mr. Krabs! I can't do that! It would break her fragile heart!". "SPONGEBOB! THAT'S AN ORDER!", Mr. Krabs says with sadness and frustration in his eyes. "Y-yes sir!", said Spongebob whilst he saluted and began to run out panting.▼
It was a video tape. It didn't have anything of discernible title nor of anything remotely close to what the video was about. No sticker, nothing on the inside of the film protector, anything. I picked it up and ran very quickly out of the lot. About a week later after my initial journey by plane back to Chicago, I remembered that I still had the tape.
I, at this point, was starting to get a bit uneasy. This wasn't the Spongebob Squarepants I knew back in the day… This was something else… Something more adult. Now even though I liked more adult stuff, this episode just made me really uneasy. Telling someone they're adopted is not an easy task. Trust me… Horrid results when it's told to you by means of someone whose parents told you to tell that person. The last time I had to do that, I had to coax someone out of committing suicide. Anyway… Back to the episode. The screen transitions again back to Spongebob's house where Pearl is seen sniffling as Spongebob pops his head into the busted doorway. Pearl looks up and immediately is overjoyed to see Spongebob.▼
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"Spongebob!”, she calls out with an excited tone, "Did you find out why Daddy won't talk to me?". Spongebob says timidly as he clears his throat, "Y… Yes… I-I did.". Pearl says in a concerned tone, "What's wrong Spongebob?". We then hear Spongebob's thoughts, "What do I do? Should I tell her? Or should I lie to Mr. Krabs? No… lying wouldn't do a thing. Mr. Krabs would probably dock my pay to half a penny a day if I did that…", this made me do a small chuckle as I knew Mr. Krabs as a cheapskate. My chuckle fell silent as I heard Spongebob just outright say, "Pearl… I don't know how to tell you this but… you're… adopted…".▼
▲It showed the three things I knew and loved about
Pearl's eyes opened wide and both SpongeBob and I cringed. I then heard a laugh coming from the computer's speakers. It was Pearl's laugh. "That's a good one Spongebob! But really, why won't Daddy talk to me?". "Pearl… it's the truth… Mr. Krabs had me come over here to tell you…". "What? No… you're lying!", Pearl then slaps Spongebob very realistically and storms out of the house. We then see Pearl walking up to the front door with tears in her eyes furious as she pushes open the door forcibly.▼
Pearl replies, "Oh Spongebob! It's terrible! Daddy won't talk to me! He hasn't said a single word to me all day! He just sits in his bedroom looking down at the floor sighing."
SpongeBob replies back to her in a bit of a heroic way, "Mr. Krabs? That seems weird… Don't worry Pearl! I'll go talk to him!".
"You will, Spongebob?" Pearl replies with a looking of happiness on her face. SpongeBob then nods. Pearl is seen hugging SpongeBob and saying, "Thanks Spongebob! You're the coralest!"
The screen transitions with bubbles coming up to SpongeBob nearing the giant anchor that Mr. Krabs and Pearl live in saying, "Cool, huh? Ch-Cha!" and you hear a jazz trumpet chorus playing a chord as SpongeBob is seen doing a comedically cool stance and look. He then knocks on Mr. Krabs' door. We then see Mr. Krabs' claw quickly grab SpongeBob and pull him into his home. "Spongebob me boy. Ah'm glad yer here. I have ter tell yer somethin'."
"What is it, Mr. Krabs?", SpongeBob asks.
"It's… It's about Pearl. You see she' - She's…"
▲
▲I, at this point, was starting to get a bit uneasy. This wasn't the
▲"Spongebob!”, she calls out with an excited tone, "Did you find out why Daddy won't talk to me?".
▲Pearl's eyes opened wide and both SpongeBob and I cringed. I then heard a laugh coming from the computer's speakers. It was Pearl's laugh. "That's a good one Spongebob! But really, why won't Daddy talk to me?". "Pearl… it's the truth… Mr. Krabs had me come over here to tell you…". "What? No… you're lying!", Pearl then slaps
She sees her father and, holding back tears, "Daddy… please tell me that it's not true… Please tell me Spongebob is lying…”. Mr. Krabs begins to tear up and in a shaky voice tells Pearl, "Yes… 'tis true… When you were a baby and while I was out scroungin' around with me metal detector near the outskirts of Bikini Bottom lookin' fer loose change, I stumbled upon you and yer Mother. Or what were left 'o her after the scallops got to her…".
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I started crying at this precise point. This became too adult… Too real for the happy little show I used to know and love. I wanted to click the X in the top right corner but I just couldn't turn away. Pearl ran out crying. Not the comedic tears either, these looked realistic… Almost human.
"Spongebob, me boy! Go after 'er! These tiny legs won't catch up to 'er! Please, boyo!".
Pearl then began to proceed to fall backwards into the seemingly endless chasm.
When I got home, I saw everything was a mess. Papers were everywhere, my TV was gone, my computer and its accompanying tower, mouse and any USBs I had in it were gone, and my VHS to DVD burner was gone. "Oh shit… I've been robbed. Where's the video? Where is it?", I said as I began to look for the video that contained the episode. I couldn't find it. That was the only VHS tape I had in my possession and I guess the robbers figured it'd be worth money. I kinda figured as well too. So, suffice to say, I'm unable to provide a video of the source. I apologize and hope you'll all heed my warning of picking up any strange tape in a famous studio lot after bumping into a famous cartoon writer. I don't think anyone will seeing as suicidemouse.avi was up on YouTube. Once again, let this story be a warning to picking up strange tapes. You never know what you're going to end up watching.
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