Sonic.EXE: Re-EXEcuted

Author’s Note: Hey, hey! It’s McRibber729, back at it again with another pasta. Well, this one is technically not mine. It’s a retake of the infamous Sonic.EXE! Now you may have questions about the sequel to The Banana. The sequel will be titled: the Eggplant! ..Yeah, can you tell what the sequel is gonna be like? Well, the story is slate to release sometime in August, or July if y’all are lucky. I’ve been trying to start it, but due to writer’s block and final exams, it’s been taking long. So, I made this to not make you guys hungry. Enjoy my own personal retake on Sonic.EXE!

A god at his playfield.

Intro: Hey there everybody, the name’s Tom. I’m fresh out of high school, and a pretty big Sonic fan, my best friend, Kyle also Iikes Sonic, and that’s how we met all the way back in first grade. So, a few weeks ago Kyle sent me a executable file through email, with the attachment titled: “SONIC” saying it was shitty and edgy as all hell, and that I should play it when I had the chance for fun. Now, I’m not one for ROM hacks as they don’t really add to the experience for me and really have one gimmick for me. But this seemed intriguing, especially since it was just titled “Sonic”. I loaded the file into an emulator and got ready. It was a bit off putting to say the least. The game started out with a modified title screen, with Sonic being a bit.. Off. I’m not too sure why, but something sorta creeped me out about him, the way he smiled, and his eyes were weird looking, looking a bit dark tinted. When I clicked the enter button, Sonic stared at me with black eyes and red pupils, and blood dripping down his face. Yikes, Kyle was right, this game was full of edge already. The Sonic 3 character select screen was in this, despite being a Sonic 1 ROM Hack. There were three characters, being: Tails, Knuckles, and… Eggman? That was an interesting pick, and I couldn’t wait to see how he would play! For some reason, Knuckles & Eggman were locked, and only Tails was playable. Where was Sonic? Was the plot of the hack to find Sonic as all of these characters and beat their levels to find Sonic? Well, only one way to find out.

Azure Hills / Tails Level: I clicked on Tails’ slot, and quickly after, a sadistic laugh came out of my computer’s speakers. Why did that happen? Was that supposed to scare me or something? Whatever, as my computer tried processing the level, I saw the title: “Azure Hills: Act 1” It looked like Green Hill Zone, but blue-tinted. As I kept traversing through the landscape as Tails, I noticed something. The game seemed to be made from scratch, as I couldn’t fly, I couldn’t spin dash, the graphics were incredibly laggy, and there were no enemies. There were offputting depictions of animal corpses, with their guts ripped out and entrails hanging. I don’t know what kind of sick fuck would make something like this and not make the game actually good. But hey, at least it was edgy like Kyle said it would be. Finally, I had found Sonic turned his back, as I started running towards him, he had quickly stared at me with red eyes until teleporting me to him.

After this, a message popped up reading: “Heya Tails! Wanna play a game with your hero?”

Huh, neat.

Hide and Seek: After the message, I was sent to a new zone titled: “Hide and Seek” oddly enough, it took place in a burning Green Hill Zone, without said blue tint. I ran through the burning hills as Tails, who now looked incredibly paranoid and nervous. I felt a little bad for the poor fox, scared and lost without his hero. The graphics had a boost, but not the lag or text unfortunately. It looked like art of the characters. Suddenly, Sonic appeared like he did in the title screen with rusted shoes, while holding a ripped apart Metal Sonic. ..And then he started chasing me.

Welp, this was gonna suck for Tails.

The drowning music started playing, as Sonic got closer to Tails, the music started getting more and more offputting. Sonic then hit me, causing Tails to trip. Tails looked emotionless, like he knew his time was up. But then, when Sonic spawned out of nowhere, Tails started trying to run, and whimpered until Sonic grabbed him, and ripped his spine out, and stuffed the open part with Metal Sonic’s body causing him to scream. The game transitioned into a black screen, while a game over jingle from one of the games played. Then a message popped up reading: “Aw, looks like you were too slow? Wanna tRy AgAiN..?”

Intermission 1: Jeez, that was graphic. Even for such an edgy game, it still put me on edge. Where did Kyle even find this crap? The screen over Tails had his face bloodied and fused with half of Metal’s, and his stomach being half burnt, and half of Metal’s rocket. Well, that was kinda spooky, but cool. I sorta just laughed due to the absurdity of it all. Anywho now, I clicked the slot of Knuckles. That same laugh erupted throughout the background. Was the creator of the game out of ideas or something? Welp, here we go.

Running is Futile:

The act read: “Running is Futile” Wait a second, I thought Sonic games were all about running! Now the game was telling me running had no point? Well, that’s dumb. The act took place in a coal mine, with red crystals. Knuckles could punch, and glide like he usually could, unlike Tails not being able to fly. As I walked through the act, blood started flying out of nowhere, and animals were hanging from their guts, much like last time. Knuckles, unlike Tails, actually has a goal in his level. It was to collect treasure. This was pretty fun I had to admit, and Knuckles had gotten a healing glove that heals anyone you might find in this cave. Then suddenly, the red eyed Sonic appeared again, and tried to attack Knuckles, however, Knuckles quickly punched him in the jaw, sending him flying, Knuckles then spin dashed Sonic. Knuckles kept attacking, until this gore teared Sonic quickly became normal, and this Sonic begged: “Please Knuckles stop! It’s only me Sonic, calm down dude!” Knuckles had walked closer to Sonic trying to heal him, until “Sonic” had dropped the facade and kicked Knuckles’ skull in, causing it to be exposed. Knuckles let out a quick, sort of cut off yelp. Then another message appeared: “No matter if you kill me or not, I always win, cause it’ll hurt him instead.”

Well, shit.

Intermission 2: Knuckles had it better than Tails I gotta admit, only getting his skull exposed. Speaking of, Knuckles’ slot was now locked, and his skull was split through his head, and his eyes were burnt, bubbling and ripped. Again, it was locked. The only slot left was Robotnik’s, and I’m gonna be honest, I was kinda scared to click. Even if it was just a game I didn’t wanna see these characters be ripped to shreds. But whatever, I had to progress no matter what, and it wasn’t gonna get any better if I didn’t progress.

Let’s get this over with.

“…”:

As I clicked on Robotnik’s slot, I noticed something odd. His face dropped in a sense of fear as soon as I clicked on him. The typical laugh played, however it was louder, and more drawn out. The act slot read: “…” as if it was missing text. Were the devs lazy or something? The zone took place in Scrap Brain, and Robotnik quickly stopped, and saw the Tails Doll sitting down. Tails Doll started flying quickly, and the game prompted me to have Robotnik follow. Robotnik ran down a staircase where Tails Doll was also walking, the camera started to slowly pan away from Tails Doll, and I heard a squeak as I ran down. Finally, I saw this weird Sonic holding the Tails Doll with an incredibly firm grip.

Oh crap.

A dialogue box appeared reading: “Impressive, I must admit. You made it farther than most doctor. But alas.. Your story ends here. Me and my little friend decided to bait you into this trap, and you fell for it. C’mon doc, I thought you were SMARTER THAN THAT! Now.. Bring your little toys, and I’ll see how fast ?I can make them BREAK. So bring it on Robotnik, let’s see what noises you make!”

Jesus this guy liked to talk.

Sonic had gotten into a machine, and suddenly, the corpses of Tails & Knuckles surrounded Eggman, however, Metal Sonic came in clutch at the last few seconds, joining the brawl. Turns out, the one used to kill Tails was a spare or an inferior clone / model. Maybe there was some hope for Robotnik, and maybe he could save Sonic and friends!

But alas, this wasn’t the case.

Tails Doll had snuck up on Robotnik, and snapped his neck from behind. However.. Metal Sonic had managed to outrun them. One last cutscene had played showing Metal Sonic running away and saying:

“I’M SORRY, CREATOR..”

I had felt a little bad for Metal, having to leave behind his creator like that. However, there were bigger problems at hand, that of being what would happen next.

Aftermath:

The game reset on itself, and when I tried playing it..

A game over screen had loaded.

From what I can remember: Tails’ face was replaced with the fake Metal’s faceplate, and his limbs were hanging from a tree, Knuckles’ skin was burnt off, and his guts were forcefed to him. Eggman’s skin was pale and his skull melted and dried out. And throughout it all, Sonic was grinning and seemed to enjoy it. That was pretty grim to think about, this hero to many being evil all along was.. Really stupid, yet kinda disturbing. Suddenly, that same damned laugh at erupted through my computer’s speakers, I gotta admit it, this kinda made me annoyed. I was tired of hearing that sick fuck chuckle, and I sorta groaned and rolled my eyes.

But when I turned around, Sonic had appeared, but he looked different.

Finale:

I couldn’t believe it, Sonic was sorta REAL! This was both cool, and scary. Especially after that whole mess of a hack. However, he looked green, blue and black, and his face didn’t really look like a face, it looked more like a creepy mask.

”Heya champ!”

”Hi Sonic.. How are you here? And what you did to Tails, Knuckles, and Eggman wasn’t cool.”

”Did you enjoy my adjustments to their bodies?”

”No.”

”Oh. Oh well, I will have my critics?”

”Calling out sadistic murder is being a critic..?”

”Well, not exactly. You see, I see my victims as pieces for my art, you know?”

”Art? Why not draw something on paper.. Instead, of well, you know. Killing everyone in your damn world, Sonic!”

”Easy there. Murdering is my art, I want to see what I can do their bodies, and see what I can morph with their bodies, see how I can make their bones flex, and even merge their corpses together! And please, call me The EXEcutor.”

”Why not the Artist since you talk about being such a great artist.”

“Real funny.”

”Why them though? Why your friends?”

”Well.. I’m not Sonic, I took form of his body using it as a vessel and left him to die.”

”Makes sense, but why you green?”

”I can’t manifest into the real world without some.. Difficulties..”

“Ah.”

Suddenly, Sonic changed into a more creepy appearance, looking more like the one I saw in the game but still glitched.

”Much better.”

”Not much.”

”You know Tom, Kyle didn’t want you to play the game.”

”He didn’t?”

”Yes, check the email again for me. For your old pal Sonic.”

I had walked over to my computer, and Kyle had given me a different email, saying this:

”yo tom did you play that game yet?? if not please don’t dude it’s apparently like, haunted and shit and you’ll start experiencing hallucinations and crap brah, pretty freaky report it on the sonic retro site or some shit get it taken down or something”

Dear god. I didn’t listen, I was a terrible friend, and thanks to my stupidity Kyle could be hurt. I didn’t notice the email, I swear, if I did I wouldn’t have played it. Was Kyle okay? I wasn’t gonna waste time asking questions about cartoon characters, and jumped straight to the point.

”WHAT DID YOU DO WITH KYLE?”

”Wake up.”

”ANSWER ME YOU BLUE BASTARD!”

”It’s time to wake up.”

Suddenly, I heard a clock ticking until a loud ringing sound blasted my ears.

I had woken up, and in my hand..

Was a homemade Sonic plush.

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