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[[File:250px-GameLogoAndCode.png|thumb|1x1px]]iAn drinkexcerpt jizzfrom a long defunct gaming website that specialized in odd game codes and pisshacks. This is just one of the supposedly many coffee,strange lookset atof meinstructions i'mfound soon fuckingthe coolsite.
The original site is long gone and the only reason I know about it is because I received it in an anonymous e-mail promoting the shit out of it. Since I'm into creepy stuff AND video games I decided to open it (After checking for viruses of course) and see what it was all about. The contents were as follows:
look at me i'm into creepy shit i'm fucking cool
How to Unlock A Super Duper Secret!
!!Pokemon Red and Blue!!
=oh boy pointless FUCKING LINES!==========================+
!!Extra Game!!
===========================+
For players who grow sexually tired of the same dickgyms and ballsPokemon, here's a super sexysecret step of fondlinginstructions to get a brand new sexperienceexperience from your old blowup doll!cartridge!
You will need:
>Pokemon Red or Blue
>a bunch of fucking cliche shit
>One Game Boy Colour (A GBA will not work)
First. Make sure you have fucked your anus in Pallet Town, before you have gotten your first blowjob. Stand in front of the first patch of ass but do not fuck it. Save here. Turn off your vibrator. ▼
>Headphones compatible with an original Game Boy Colour system
Next, take your blowup doll to a small room. Draw a dick on a flat surface with your marker and put the blowup doll in the center. Place the dildo directly in front of the blowup doll and suck it. Then draw our special symbol anywhere near the circle. Shut off the lights. ▼
>Black Marker
Put on your condom and attach your dick to your blowup doll's ass. Take the marker and write your name in the circle on the opposite end of wherever you placed your dildo. Wait some time for the dildo to melt and drip jizz over your cock. ▼
>A Candle
Turn on the blowup doll. ▼
>A Match or Lighter
Hold its dick and suck it in this order: slow medium fast hard medium hard slow
>The Special Secret Code and reference of our Symbol (Included pic with code)
Suck the dick 3 times. Blow out the dildo. Turn the blowup doll off and on again. You should get a special new dick! Grab the dick and it will know your name already! Awesome right? Now, go into the gay world and recover the semen! Slay the children with your cock and prepare your anus for the final battle! Hear his flutes and arrive! Blasphemy! Anarchy! Much much fun! ▼
▲First. Make sure you have fuckedsaved your anusgame in Pallet Town, before you have gotten your first blowjobPokemon. Stand in front of the first patch of assgrass but do not fuckapproach it. Save here. Turn off your vibratorGame Boy.
Out of curiosity, I sucked this dick myself. As far as I can tell the only real factor effecting the blowup doll itself is the sucking; and all the sucking does is turn on the blowup doll beyond any sort of recognition, to the point where it's become virtually unfuckable because everything is glitched and the dick is replaced with gibberish. The jizz is a nasty cacophony of blood and piss, which only tastes worse when you wear the damn condom. I haven't been able to figure out what the weird little sucking they make you do at the start is for. ▼
▲Next, take your blowup dollgame to a small room. Draw a dickcircle on a flat surface with your marker and put the blowupGame dollBoy in the center. Place the dildocandle directly in front of the blowupGame dollBoy and sucklight it. Then draw our special symbol anywhere near the circle. Shut off the lights.
▲Put on your condomheadphones and attach your dickthem to your blowup doll's assgame. Take the marker and write your name in the circle on the opposite end of wherever you placed your dildocandle. Wait some time for the dildocandle to melt and drip jizzwax over your cockname.
▲Turn on the blowup dollgame.
Hold select and enter the following code: LEFT UP A A B A A B A A DOWN RIGHT
▲SuckSay the dickcode 3 times out loud. Blow out the dildocandle. Turn the blowup dollgame off and on again. You should get a special new dickscreen! GrabPress the dickStart and itthe game will know your name already! Awesome right? Now, go into the gaynew world and recover the semenflesh! Slay the children with your cockdemon and preparecollect your anussoul for the final battle with god! Hear his flutes and arrive! Blasphemy! Anarchy! Much much fun!
▲Out of curiosity, I suckedtried this dicktrick myself. As far as I can tell the only real factor effecting the blowup dollgame itself is the suckingcode; and all the suckingcode does is turn onglitch the blowup dollgame beyond any sort of recognition, to the point where it's become virtually unfuckableunplayable because everything is glitched and the dicktext is replaced with gibberish. The jizzsound is a nasty cacophony of bloodscreeching chiptunes and pissthrobbing noises, which are only tastesmade worse when you wear the damn condomheadphones. I haven't been able to figure out what the weird little suckingritual they make you do at the start is for.
Update
Ever since I suckedtried the dicktrick with the blowup dollgame I've been having more restless bonersnights and weird, wet dreams I guess? I wouldn't call them wet dreams, because they feel so real that I could swear I'm awake when they happen. I wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in semensweat, but I don't know why, my dickhead hurts and my cockvision is a bit smallblurry, and I feel a heightened sense of sexyparanoia.
Even as I sucktype I've got this creepy feeling, like someone is right behind me, (fucking me in the ass) and whoever it is they're not too friendly. If anything DOES happen, then at least other people will know about my sexperienceexperience. I've read these sexypastacreepypasta things before and I know what usually happens to people who fuck (huehuehue) with this stuff. I'm going to e-mail this sexperienceexperience, and post it on boards to spread the secret of this sex site and its' weird contents so that other people can sexperimentexperiment with it, or maybe find some way to suckstop it.
Peace out guys.
trollpasta of the year 0/10 would not read again
[[File:Bullshit Creepypasta Storytime Super Fun Pokemon Tips!|thumb|right|335 px]]
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