The Diary: Difference between revisions

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Hello,  My name is Andrew, my little brother passed away from a suicide about 18 years ago. (he would have been 30)
Almost 10 years ago, my brother committed suicide. I just found his diary today in a secret panel in his room while i was helping my parents move out. The 12th to last page was... odd.
 
Our parents were moving out of the house we grew up in, so I helped them pack up.
'''January 10th, 2008 -''' Wow, awesome!! My parents got me Portal! Can't wait to play it!
 
When I went through my little brothers room, I felt nostalgic at seeing all his old possessions. But at the same time, saddened with vivid memories of his suicide. The police were here, tape everywhere, due to me finding his body (he had scrawled on his body "FREE ME" with a knife) and I kept crying.
'''January 11th, 2008 -''' Okay, the game is glitching. When I see myself I go all rainbowy and stuff. But this only happens for like a millisecond. I told my friend Jacob and he just said that I needed to clean the disc
 
Anyway, while searching through his room, I found his diary.
'''January 13th, 2008 -''' I did clean the disc, but when I fought GLaDoS, she mumbled something about being free. I told my friends about it and they said they heard just the normal lines. Which I guess means I have better hearing. This is a weird (but cool) game.
 
It had typical things, such as things with friends, school, video games. (somethings were even about puberty and girls)
'''January 16th, 2008 -''' Chell won't move where I tell her to. One time a text bubble popped up saying "I want to be free -Doug Rattmann". this is creeping me out. I told my friends about it but they all say nothing like that is happening with their games.
 
But what Intrigued me the most was what was going on in his mind at the end. I flipped throught the pages but stopped when I saw all the exclamation marks at about the 12th to last page.
'''January 20th, 2008 -''' When I got to the final level of the game again,I fought GLaDoS. The walls had NOTE: this was all he had written, there was also a small amount of what appeared to be blood on the page.
 
I would summarize it, but I think everything speaks for itself.
'''January 26th, 2008 -''' I'm starting to get it all, what Rattmann is telling me. We communicate. I speak to him, he pops up a bubble. What's the point of life. I have to work hard in school, only to then work harder in college, then a job. Only to what? Die. Doug is the only person that told me why this world is useless. He told about how he is just a mindless mass of pixels that came together just for me, just to tell me to be free from the disappointments.
 
==January 10th, 1994==
'''February 4th, 2008 -''' I told my friends about what was happening, they all said I was a "downer" and a "creep" This was disapointment #1
Wow, awesome!!
 
My parents got me Super Metriod! [sic]
'''February 7th, 2008 -''' I told Rattmann about the therapy and the medications my parents put me on. He told me to ignore it all and how I was going to be free soon enough. He also said Chell loves me, but because Chell was in a TV, this would end up being another disappointment. The second of many that would come later.
 
I loved the original, Cant wait to play it! [sic]
'''February 13th, 2008 -''' Doug pretended to kill himself. I was shocked at first, But before I turned the console off, he got back up! He said he could connect me with more people he freed. It was weird since he had a hole in his head. But who cares. P.S. I asked him why he did it, he said "just to have fun with you." Can't wait for more!
 
==January 11th, 1994==
'''February 18th, 2008 -''' I met new friends. All who were freed. They gave me a knife through the TV (which at first was scary) and said "use it when we decide the time is right to free you."
 
Okay, the game is glitching. Sometimes Samus goes all rainbowy and stuff. [sic]
'''February 19th, 2008 -''' We had another meeting. My idiotic parents barged in but Rattmann quickly switched backed to the game. After a long useless talk. We went for ice cream and shit. Fuck them. The free people told me how when I was leaving this wretched place, I would join them, in a disappointment free and better life. Where kids my age and older were going to be there, with Rattmann, and other people he said were going to be my friends.
 
But this only happens for like a millisecond. One time I think I saw her face.
'''February 20th, 2008 -''' I can't wait! I've never been so happy! I'm going to be free! I'm going to live in paradise with my new friends, Rattmann and I are going to have so much fun! So much! I can't wait! Rattmann told me how he knew I was writing this and told me to hide it so no one knows our "little secret"! I can't wait to be free!
 
I told my friend Jacoby and he just said that I needed to clean it out.
This was the last page he wrote, sadly, it was on the same day as his suicide. The Portal game along with the Xbox 360 were all taken away for evidence. I think the most startling fact is that he talked about the game talking to him. Which made no sense. He was being tested for schizophrenia at the time, so I guess I could leave it at that. But that doesn't explain why it was so sudden. Or why he stopped preaching about being free after what happened at school. Or how he got the knife in the first place. When I showed my parents this, they simply dismissed it as him going insane. When I asked "how would someone go this crazy in a month?", they were puzzled. I'm still helping them move out tomorrow, so I can still snoop around and see if I catch anything else that's out of the ordinary...
 
==January 13th, 1994==
{{hrb}}
 
''I might make either a sequel or a spinoff of this.''
I did clean it out, but when I fought Kraid, he mumbled something about being free. I told my friends about it and they said they didn't hear anything. Which I guess means I have better hearing.
 
This is a weird (but cool) game.
 
==Janurary 16th, 1994==
 
Samus won't move where I tell her to. One time a text bubble popped up saying "I want to be free". this is weirding me out. I told my friends about it but they all say nothing like that is happening with their games. [sic]
 
==Janurary 20th, 1994==
 
When I hit the sunken ship, I fought the ghost thing.
 
The background of the fight had*
 
 
 
 
 
*Note, this was all he had written, there was also a small amount of what appeared to be blood was on the page.
 
==Janurary 26th, 1994==
 
I'm starting to get it all, what Samus is telling me.
 
We communicate. I speak to her, she pops up a bubble.
 
What's the point of life. I have to work hard in school, only to then work harder in college, then a job. Only to what? Die. Samus is the only person that told me why this world is useless. She told about how she is just a mindless mass of pixels that came together just for me, just to tell me to be free from the dissappointments.
 
==Feburary 4th, 1994==
 
I told my friends about what was happening, the all said how I was a "downer" and a "creep"
 
 
 
Dissapointment  #1
 
==February 7th, 1994==
 
I told Samus about the therapy [sic] and the medications my parents put me on. She told me to ignore it all and how I was going to be free soon enough. She also said she loved me, but because she was a TV, this would end up being another disappointment. The second of many that would come later.
 
==February 13th, 1994==
 
Samus pretended to kill herself. I was shocked at first, But before I turned the console off, Samus got back up! She said she could connect me with more people she freed. It was weird since she had a hole in her head. But who cares. 
 
P.S. I asked her why she did it, she said "just to have fun with you." Can't wait for more!
 
==February 18th, 1994==
 
I met new friends. All who were freed. They gave me a knife through the TV (which at first was scary) and said "use it when we decide the time is right to free you."
 
==February 19th, 1994==
 
We had another meeting. My idiotic parents barged in but Samus quickly switched backed to the game.
 
After a long useless talk. We went for ice cream and shit. Fuck them. The free people told me how when I was leaving this wretched place, I would join them, in a disappointment free and better life. Where kids my age and older where going to be there, with Samus, and other people she said where [sic] going to be my friends.
 
==February 20th, 1994==
 
I can't wait! I've never been so happy! I'm going to be free! I'm going to live in paradise with my new friends, Samus and I are going to have so much fun! So much! I can't wait!
 
Samus told me how she knew I was writing this and told me to hide it so no one knows our "little secret"!
 
I can't wait to be free!
 
==Epilogue==
 
This was the last page he wrote, sadly, it was on the same day as his suicide. The Super Metroid game along with the SNES we're all taken away for evidence. But I found the diary from under his dresser. I think the most startling fact is that he talked about the game talking to him. Which made no sense.
 
He was being tested for <span style="">schizophrenia at the time, so I guess I could leave it at that. But that doesn't explain why it was so sudden. Or why he stopped preaching about being free after what happened at school. Or how he got the knife in the first place.</span>
 
When I showed my parents this, they simply dismissed it as him going insane. When I asked "how would someone go this crazy in a month", they were puzzled. I'm still helping them move out tomorrow, so I can still snoop around and see if I catch anything else that's out of the ordinary...
{{v|reading|zgD0W7LXohs}}
{{by|DrCaffeine5000|wiki=someordinarygamers|date=February 24, 2013}}
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