ALF Lost Episode: Difference between revisions
m
→top: replaced: “ → " (30), ” → " (29), ’ → ' (53)
No edit summary |
m (→top: replaced: “ → " (30), ” → " (29), ’ → ' (53)) |
||
Line 1:
{{NSFW}}
Anyway, I was getting ready to kill myself because I was feeling deeply suicidal at the thought that nobody remembers Alf anymore. I called the suicide hotline and told them about it, and they laughed and hung up on me. They said
I got the pops, an ice cold litre of milk and a cereal bowl. I also got utensils including spoons and forks. While forks are not normally used to cut up Alf Pops, sometimes there are rats in these old cereal boxes and I needed a weapon to defend myself if this was such a case. You probably
I poured the cereal and milk into the bowl and got a hefty spoonful before my two front teeth broke off and flew across the room. The prize…was a VHS. Not just any VHS, no, but the VHS I had always wanted. It was the VHS of Alf. Now I know what
I put the VHS tape on, expecting a great program.
The scene immediately cut to the family, who were encased in a massive glutenous red jelly. The Alf voice whispered.
My cat, Markus Portwell was going through the garbage cans looking for delicious tuna when a familiar face appeared by my window. It was Alf. I
It was then that a familiar voice appeared. Alf? God? Alfgod?
I simply
And then…he handed me the Book of Mormon. Yes, friend, chilling as this revelation may be. Alf is a Mormon.
I cleared my throat and looked out at the audience. Someone had carved out 2/3 of my breakfast nook and filled it with shitty Alf puppets.
I went into the back alley and heard my neighbor snickering. I picked up some gardening shears and cut his genitals off. My god…the prophecy foretold.
The Alf suit drifted up into the heavens in a bright, sparkling beam of light as its internal organs fell out like delicious fruit punch with fish guts in it. I gave the puppet a middle finger and yelled
I could feel them crawl into my mouth as I ate my eggs. They went into my throat, into my intestines, and multiplied. They crawled up through my central nervous system, shimmied into my blood stream and danced in my Alf Alf. You may think
{{GLE|SilverLikesBabyToysLolz}}
|