Boomhauer Language
The Boomhauer language is a language spoken by Boomhauer, a character from King of the Hill. Here's the guide on how to speak it.
Talkin about...dang old
The Boomhauer language uses a system that usually puts "dang old" in front of almost every noun and frequently, "talkin about" at the beginning of some verbs. See the example.
"Hey man I tell ya what man dang old boy ain't right man I'm talkin about kickin his dang old ass man." (My boy ain't right I'm kicking his ass.)
"Talkin about" will most-likely happen in first-person verbs. See the third-person example.
"Dang old government takin away the dang old freedom of smoke man." (The government is taking away the freedom of smoke.)
If there is an adjective directly before the noun, the adjective will be placed between the "dang old" and the noun. See the example.
Correct: Dang old pretty pizza.
Incorrect: Pretty dang old pizza.
Hey man I tell ya what man - dang old - noun - talkin about - verb.
Hey man I tell ya what man...man
Sometimes, the final "man" in "hey man I tell ya what man" can be replaced with the name of the addressee. See the example.
"Hey man I tell ya what Hank..."
The final "man" in the speech or writing is never changed.
Final test
You will be given five phrases in Boomhauer. See if you can understand them.
- "Hey man I tell ya what man dang old boy ain't right man I'm talkin about kickin his dang old ass man."
- "Hey man I tell ya what man dang old government helicopters man ain't no good man. Talkin about flying all over the dang old place watchin us man."
- "Hey man I tell ya what man that dang old internet can get ya dang old pictures of naked girls man."
- "Hey man I tell ya what man the dang old MegaloMart talkin about dang old BOOM!"
- "Hey man I tell ya what man back in dang old early America man. Talkin about havin dang old freedom and democracy man now dang old Obama talkin about 'We watchin you!' man."
If you were able to understand the previous Boomhauer phrases, then congratulations, you passed the test and are now are able to speak and understand Boomhauer perfectly. If not, get the fuck outta here, you motherfucking cock-sucking bi-AND THEN A HYPER-REALISTIC SKELETON IN A PATRIXXX COSTUME POPPED OUT AND YOU DIED.