Pissman: Difference between revisions

 

That branch of the wilderness was transformed into an ocean on that day, and it is said that those who sail out into the middle will be confronted by a humanoid composed of urine with a raisin face with several holes which will ask you if you know what ''pee'' (that's pees proper pronoun, use it for the sake of your fate) does when outsiders come by. If you tell peem that you don't know, pee will touch the back of your neck. If it is not sweaty enough, you will spontaneously appear back on land. In this case, bury yourself alive or be swept away by a tidal wave of urine four hundred and thirty-one minutes later. If it is sweaty enough, pee will hiss and wave goodbye as it sinks into the ocean, and you'll be free to go. If you tell peem that pee likes to make outsiders fearful and sweaty and then touch the back of their neck for the salty sweat, you will be responsible for the second great flood. If you're going to be that asshole, at least warn everyone that they should build another Ark before you go sailing on the piss ocean (your boat will sink with you in it, by the way). If you tell peem anything else, you will fall asleep on the spot and wake up in the sewer in the form of all of the urine that you had in your body at the time of speaking with peem. And if you had no urine at the time of speaking with peem, your head will become a raisin. Not a large raisin either like that of the Pissman, a regular raisin down to the disproportionate smallness to the rest of your body. And if you don't go sailing on the Pissman's ocean after reading this, the Pissman will appear in your dreams and teach you pees pronouns peemself. Pee likes to test pees pupils too, so pay attention.