Reading Continues Through the Deletion Refugees: Difference between revisions
Reading Continues Through the Deletion Refugees (view source)
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, 2 months agoThis is humor-based commentary, not a creepypasta.
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[[File:Evil_computer.jpg|thumb|The only good thing in this story]]
Take a guess: who once again decided to take a look at the sludge that is the Deletion Refugees. Yep, that's right. It's me, and this time, I'm being pushed by Princess Callie.
At the start of this, I found a story that actually has a somewhat promising image!
I mean, look at that. Hardcore and awesome at the same time- One would think that a story with an image this good would be great, but no. The bitter truth is that behind the badass images one only finds the delusions of a confused mind.
<blockquote>
'''''1-Cent Computer, by Fentan'''''
</blockquote>
It can only be a chinese bootleg, nothing else. The Wicrosoft. Somebody copyright that.
<blockquote>
'''''As I walked down the street, I found an old garage sale. There was LOTS of stuff in it, mostly laptops and stuff, they were all only 1 cent each,'''''
</blockquote>
As you can all see, this starts with the usual cliché. Where would the creepy computer genre be without the customary GARAGE SALE OF DOOM?
<blockquote>
'''''I had over $250 in my wallet at the time, so I bought everything, not knowing what was going on'''''
</blockquote>
This author should make a collaboration to make more songs about buying stuff just because
Garage Shopping, by Fentan featuring Macklemore & Ryan Lewis and Wanz
<blockquote>
'''''As my neighbors helped me unpack my stuff, one of the laptops turned on, the neighbor said "oops!"'''''
</blockquote>
Where I live, the neighbors
<blockquote>
'''''Then he turned it off, not knowing it was possessed.'''''
</blockquote>
...nevermind. Keep your universe to yourself.
<blockquote>
'''''All of the computers were plugged in, some of the best my favorites a HP pavilion, an old emachine, a new Acer, and the one I was most happy about, the alien ware laptop. There were hundreds more, but I haven't plugged them in yet.'''''
</blockquote>
Fuck the Macs, eh? You even mentioned emachine and Alien Ware, but not Steve
Also, you just told us that all the computers were plugged in, but then you say hundreds
And where are you keeping them, by the way? Do you live in a two warehouses or what?
<blockquote>
'''''o I went to bed, forgetting about this exhausting day. 2 hours later, I woke up from a blood-curdling scream'''''
</blockquote>
Oh, about time something good happened.
<blockquote>
'''''But the strange thing, all the computer were plugged in, all, 25,500. All around my house'''''
</blockquote>
I bet the neighbors did it.
Also definitely he lives in a warehouse. Either that or his house is one big Hammerspace, which would be much cooler.
<blockquote>
'''''Then I saw blood prints, as I was following them, it led to my porch. Outside, there was the computers dealer body, there was letter drawn by blood, it said, 1-cent is not enough'''''
</blockquote>
Come on,
<blockquote>
'''''I was horrified, so I looked for my house phone, it was plugged into the wall, instead on the desk'''''
</blockquote>
OH SHIT THE HORROR
<blockquote>
'''''I called 911, then I got a voice message which said: 1-cent will always pay you back.'''''
</blockquote>
Damn it, repeating over and over the same stuff about one cent
<blockquote>
'''''Then I heard another scream, it sounded like one of my neighbors, so I ran to get my iPhone 4s, '''''
</blockquote>
Also hi there, Apple company. About time you made an appearance.
<blockquote>
'''''but it was in a debian like screen, it said 1-cent will always watch your back.'''''
</blockquote>
This sounds like
<blockquote>
'''''But then I saw that all my computers were turned on, faced toward me'''''
</blockquote>
Eeeewww, I know that it means turned on in the sense that
This is obviously a result of the Creepypasta
<blockquote>
'''''Then one of the Acers jumped in front'''''
</blockquote>
...
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...okay, this took a turn to the overly bizarre. Not that it was being logical so far.
<blockquote>
'''''and went to a screen, it looked like it had widgets, like windows vista except it had windows XP like start menu/taskbar (later discovered as windows longhorn).'''''
</blockquote>
Stephen King is jealous of your attention to detail abilities, author. Meanwhile,
<blockquote>
'''''Then all 25,500 computers swarmed up, all plugged-in, some ha card readers, other had USB's some were Macs, some were Alienware, others were dell.'''''
</blockquote>
Here we go again enumerating the brands, just that now it takes its time to name the components of the CPU.
Next time this happens
<blockquote>
'''''Then I saw a laptop dragging a bloody corpse with its hearts in organs carved out, with flies around the corpse'''''
</blockquote>
With its what in what? Multiple hearts? Was that corpse a medical anomaly? An alien? An octopus?
<blockquote>
'''''Then, wires starting coming out, then, I saw a thumping heart exposed in the emachine'''''
</blockquote>
SEND MORE BANANAS.
<blockquote>
'''''Then, wires starting coming up, and an error said, "Your next".'''''
</blockquote>
This whole story is an error.
Also obligatory
<blockquote>
'''''Then a picture of a cat that said, "I can has heart plz". The picture had a cat with grey fur, but the poor cats eyes had blood coming out and his rib cage exposed, with his heart missing.'''''
</blockquote>
Where are the simple times when cute cats asked for cheeseburgers? But no, now we only get this shit :(
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I bet that behind that image there was a Y U NO HEART and a picture of a heart with the Forever Alone face.
<blockquote>
'''''Also, the Macs got the finder windows up with a red finder, but there was blood pouring from his nose and mouth.'''''
</blockquote>
It may be because
<blockquote>
'''''I saw that the old e-machine had a picture of a troll that said "u gutted bro?"'''''
</blockquote>
More memes
Line 125 ⟶ 173:
GOD SMITE ME NOW AND SAVE ME THE PAIN OF READING THIS
<blockquote>
'''''I actually felt sorry for the troll for some reason because he had spikes separating his lips from his mouth and his brain exposed'''''
</blockquote>
You feel sorry for the image in the computer, author? What about me?! What about the readers? Why
Also ew
<blockquote>
'''''As I tried to run for the door, the computers had a wall charger which was standing up right like a snake,'''''
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
'''''then my power went out, and then the computers moved out of the way as...'''''
</blockquote>
It
Truly a beautiful
<blockquote>
'''''the server dragged its self out with blood all over it, a computer towers shot a disk right at me it missed,'''''
</blockquote>
This sounds like a Final Destination death. No really, in one of the books, somebody died when a lot of stereos threw CDs at him.
<blockquote>
'''''fter that, my dog came in curious of what is going on; the computer tower shot another disk at its head, and my dogs head got chopped off, as I saw inside the dogs heart last beating,'''''
</blockquote>
GRATUITOUS ANIMAL SLAUGHTER
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Clearly the mark of a worthwhile story. Also sarcasm.
<blockquote>
'''''the server them reached inside his cut-off neck and pulled out his heart, then sucked it in,'''''
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
'''''I saw that the computers all got blue screens (except for the computers with Linux and Mac)'''''
'''''the computers started to get sparks, and sadly, all my new computers around my house caught on fire, and exploded,'''''
</blockquote>
This is so fucking convenient that it
Also
I bet he is mourning the loss of his 250 dollars. Cheapskate.
<blockquote>
'''''but when I thought it was over, the burnt circuits stood up together, and acted like a dog with the sound,'''''
</blockquote>
...welp.
I thought it was over too. Clearly the world
<blockquote>
'''''nd tackled me, and said: "1-cent is enough to kill though."'''''
</blockquote>
Slimebeast says death costs 25 cents.
<blockquote>
'''''Then, wires started popping up and stabbed into my skin, and the computer circuits said: "Shhhh, 1-cent is not enough to buy me"'''''
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
'''''I walked down the street, I found an old garage sale. There was LOTS of stuff in it, mostly laptops and stuff,'''''
</blockquote>
Wait a second...
<blockquote>
'''''they were all only 1 cent each, I had over $250 in my wallet at the time, so I bought everything, not knowing what was going on.'''''
</blockquote>
...this seems familiar...
<blockquote>
'''''s my neighbors helped me unpack my stuff, one of the laptops turned on,'''''
</blockquote>
...welp.
No way! I
<blockquote>
'''''the neighbor said "oops!" Then he turned it off, not knowing it was possessed.'''''
'''''All of the computers were plugged in, a HP pavilion, an old emachine, a new Acer, and the one I was most happy about, the alien ware laptop. There were hundreds more, but I
'''''Then all 25,500 computers swarmed up, all plugged-in, some ha card readers, other had
</blockquote>
If I had a cent for every wrong thing in this story,
This story was once again a reminder that the Computers genre in Creepypasta lacks a lot of things. Run away from it, people, before you know it
[[Category:Deletion Log Refugees]]
[[Category:Rants]]
[[Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ]]
{{Comments}}
[[Category:Trollpasta]]
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