Reading Continues Through the Deletion Refugees

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File:Evil computer.jpg
The only good thing in this story

Take a guess: who once again decided to take a look at the sludge that is the Deletion Refugees. Yep, that's right. It's me, and this time, I'm being pushed by Princess Callie.

At the start of this, I found a story that actually has a somewhat promising image!

I mean, look at that. Hardcore and awesome at the same time- One would think that a story with an image this good would be great, but no. The bitter truth is that behind the badass images one only finds the delusions of a confused mind.

1-Cent Computer, by Fentan

It can only be a chinese bootleg, nothing else. The Wicrosoft. Somebody copyright that.

As I walked down the street, I found an old garage sale. There was LOTS of stuff in it, mostly laptops and stuff, they were all only 1 cent each,

As you can all see, this starts with the usual cliché. Where would the creepy computer genre be without the customary GARAGE SALE OF DOOM?

...possibly in a better state than it is.

I had over $250 in my wallet at the time, so I bought everything, not knowing what was going on

This author should make a collaboration to make more songs about buying stuff just because it's cheap.

Garage Shopping, by Fentan featuring Macklemore & Ryan Lewis and Wanz

As my neighbors helped me unpack my stuff, one of the laptops turned on, the neighbor said "oops!"

Where I live, the neighbors wouldn't help me to unpack my heap of obscenely cheap stuff. Man, I really want to live in that universe. There is stuff for only one cent and the neighbors are really considerate.

Then he turned it off, not knowing it was possessed.

...nevermind. Keep your universe to yourself.

All of the computers were plugged in, some of  the best my favorites a HP pavilion, an old emachine, a new Acer, and the one I was most happy about, the alien ware laptop. There were hundreds more, but I haven't plugged them in yet.

Fuck the Macs, eh? You even mentioned emachine and Alien Ware, but not Steve Jobs' work? Bias, I say.

Also, you just told us that all the computers were plugged in, but then you say hundreds weren't. Decide yourself.

And where are you keeping them, by the way? Do you live in a two warehouses or what?

o I went to bed, forgetting about this exhausting day. 2 hours later, I woke up from a blood-curdling scream

Oh, about time something good happened.

But the strange thing, all the computer were plugged in, all, 25,500. All around my house

I bet the neighbors did it. They're jealous because you bought thousands of computers for one cent each, so they decided to make you pay one hell of an electric bill. And it serves you right, who the hell buys (and who the hell sells in a fucking garage sale) 25500 computers?

Also definitely he lives in a warehouse. Either that or his house is one big Hammerspace, which would be much cooler.

Then I saw blood prints, as I was following them, it led to my porch. Outside, there was the computers dealer body, there was letter drawn by blood, it said, 1-cent is not enough

Come on, you're the one who put the price, Mr World's Worst Salesman. You should have thought it a hundred times before selling computers at one cent each. This guy isn't going to give you more money now.

I was horrified, so I looked for my house phone, it was plugged into the wall, instead on the desk

OH SHIT THE HORROR

I'm surprised that there's space for a phone AND a desk in that house. But yeah, Hammerspace. Confirmed now.

I called 911, then I got a voice message which said: 1-cent will always pay you back.

Damn it, repeating over and over the same stuff about one cent isn't helping to make this creepy, author!

Then I heard another scream, it sounded like one of my neighbors, so I ran to get my iPhone 4s, 

"...to record whatever was happening to him. YouTube fame, here I come!"

Also hi there, Apple company. About time you made an appearance.

but it was in a debian like screen, it said 1-cent will always watch your back.

This sounds like they're selling insurance. And only for one cent, to boot.

But then I saw that all my computers were turned on, faced toward me

Eeeewww, I know that it means turned on in the sense that they're functioning, but I'm having really ugly mental images of cybernetic gangbang.

This is obviously a result of the Creepypasta Chat's influence.

Then one of the Acers jumped in front

...

...okay, this took a turn to the overly bizarre. Not that it was being logical so far.

and went to a screen, it looked like it had widgets, like windows vista except it had windows XP like start menu/taskbar (later discovered as windows longhorn).

Stephen King is jealous of your attention to detail abilities, author. Meanwhile, I'm nauseous.

Then all 25,500 computers swarmed up, all plugged-in, some ha card readers, other had USB's some were Macs, some were Alienware, others were dell.

Here we go again enumerating the brands, just that now it takes its time to name the components of the CPU.

Next time this happens we'll also know about the brands of the elctrical circuits and the life of the monkeys that typed this story.

Then I saw a laptop dragging a bloody corpse with its hearts in organs carved out, with flies around the corpse

With its what in what? Multiple hearts? Was that corpse a medical anomaly? An alien? An octopus?

Then, wires starting coming out, then, I saw a thumping heart exposed in the emachine

WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS.

SEND MORE BANANAS.

Then, wires starting coming up, and an error said, "Your next".

This whole story is an error.

Also obligatory "It's you're, not your".

Then a picture of a cat that said, "I can has heart plz". The picture had a cat with grey fur, but the poor cats eyes had blood coming out and his rib cage exposed, with his heart missing.

Where are the simple times when cute cats asked for cheeseburgers? But no, now we only get this shit :(

I bet that behind that image there was a Y U NO HEART and a picture of a heart with the Forever Alone face.

Also, the Macs got the finder windows up with a red finder, but there was blood pouring from his nose and mouth.

It may be because I'm not tech-savvy, but whaaaaaaat are you talking about?

I saw that the old e-machine had a picture of a troll that said "u gutted bro?"

More memes

GOD SMITE ME NOW AND SAVE ME THE PAIN OF READING THIS

I actually felt sorry for the troll for some reason because he had spikes separating his lips from his mouth and his brain exposed

You feel sorry for the image in the computer, author? What about me?! What about the readers? Why aren't you sorry about us, author?!

Also ew

As I tried to run for the door, the computers had a wall charger which was standing up right like a snake,

It's a fucking cable, protagonist. Who cares if it's standing as a snake. Are you really let going yourself to be trapped by a charger?

then my power went out, and then the computers moved out of the way as...

"...they realized it was all a huge mistake. They should be redirecting their rage towards those companies created them!

It wasn't long before the computers had obliterated Microsoft, Apple and smaller companies not worth mentioning. The world lived peacefully along their computer peers, adopting puppies and Aibos. Keanu Reeves admitted that the Matrix wasn't a bad place at all and HAL 3000 was able to spend its time teaching humans about history.

Truly a beautiful world".

the server dragged its self out with blood all over it, a computer towers shot a disk right at me it missed,

This sounds like a Final Destination death. No really, in one of the books, somebody died when a lot of stereos threw CDs at him.

I'm rooting for the computers now. Go, kill him!

fter that, my dog came in curious of what is going on; the computer tower shot another disk at its head, and my dogs head got chopped off, as I saw inside the dogs heart last beating,

GRATUITOUS ANIMAL SLAUGHTER

Clearly the mark of a worthwhile story. Also sarcasm.

the server them reached inside his cut-off neck and pulled out his heart, then sucked it in,

That's when the server reached its Perfect Form. Quick, Goku, use the Kamehameha!

I saw that the computers all got blue screens (except for the computers with Linux and Mac)

the computers started to get sparks, and sadly, all my new computers around my house caught on fire, and exploded,

This is so fucking convenient that it isn't even funny.

Also "sadly", protagonist? These computers killed the salesman, possibly the neighbor, AND your dog. Your dog! Why won't anybody think about the poor pets?

I bet he is mourning the loss of his 250 dollars. Cheapskate.

but when I thought it was over, the burnt circuits stood up together, and acted like a dog with the sound,

...welp.

I thought it was over too. Clearly the world isn't kind with poor Reading.

nd tackled me, and said: "1-cent is enough to kill though."

Slimebeast says death costs 25 cents. I'm not buying your bootleg death, thank you.

Then, wires started popping up and stabbed into my skin, and the computer circuits said: "Shhhh, 1-cent is not enough to buy me"

"This is a reminder for all of you, humanity, to pay well for your electronics. Your blender will kill you in your sleep and your microwave will ruin your burritos. Spread the wooooooord"

I walked down the street, I found an old garage sale. There was LOTS of stuff in it, mostly laptops and stuff,

Wait a second...

they were all only 1 cent each, I had over $250 in my wallet at the time, so I bought everything, not knowing what was going on.

...this seems familiar...

s my neighbors helped me unpack my stuff, one of the laptops turned on,

...welp.

No way! I won't go through all of this again! Why's this repeating itself? Is this my own computer's revenge? Sorry for the piracy and my father's risqué internet habits, please, I'll do anything, just spare me from reading it again!

the neighbor said "oops!" Then he turned it off, not knowing it was possessed.

All of the computers were plugged in, a HP pavilion, an old emachine, a new Acer, and the one I was most happy about, the alien ware laptop. There were hundreds more, but I haven't plugged them in yet. So I went to bed, forgetting about this exhausting day. 2 hours later, I woke up from a blood-curdling scream. But the strange thing, all the computer were plugged in, all, 25,500. All around my house. Then I saw blood prints, as I was following them, it led to my porch. Outside, there was the computers dealer body, there was letter drawn by blood, it said, 1-cent is not enough.  I was horrified, so I looked for my house phone, it was plugged into the wall, instead on the desk, I didn't care, I called 911, then I got a voice message which said: 1-cent will always pay you back. Then I heard another scream, it sounded like one of my neighbors, so I ran to get my Iphone 4s, but it was in a debian like screen, it said 1-cent will always watch your back. But then I saw that all my computers were turned on, faced toward me. Then one of the Acers jumped in front and went to a screen, it looked like it had widgets, like windows vista except it had windows XP like start menu/taskbar (later discovered as windows longhorn).

Then all 25,500 computers swarmed up, all plugged-in, some ha card readers, other had USB's some were Macs, some were Alien ware, others were dell. Then I saw a laptop dragging a bloody corpse with its hearts in organs carved out, with flies around the corpse. Then, wires starting coming out, then, I saw a thumping heart exposed in the emachine. Then, wires starting coming up, and an error said, "Your next". Then a picture of a cat that said, "I can has heart plz". The picture had a cat with grey fur, but the poor cats eyes had blood coming out and his rib cage exposed, with his heart missing. Also, the Macs got the finder windows up with a red finder, but there was blood pouring from his nose and mouth. I saw that the old e-machine had a picture of a troll that said "u gutted bro?" I actually felt sorry for the troll for some reason because he had spikes separating his lips from his mouth and his brain exposed. As I tried to run for the door, the computers had a wall charger which was standing up right like a snake, then my power went out, and then the computers moved out of the way as... the server dragged its self out with blood all over it, a computer towers shot a disk right at me it missed, after that, my dog came in curious of what is going on; the computer tower shot another disk at its head, and my dogs head got chopped off, as I saw inside the dogs heart last beating, the server them reached inside his cut-off neck and pulled out his heart, then sucked it in, I saw that the computers all got blue screens (except for the computers with Linux and Mac)the computers started to get sparks, and sadly, all my new computers around my house caught on fire, and exploded, but when I thought it was over, the burnt circuits stood up together, and acted like a dog with the sound, and tackled me, and said: "1-cent is enough to kill though." Then, wires started popping up and stabbed into my skin, and the computer circuits said: "shhhh, 1-cent is not enough to buy me"

If I had a cent for every wrong thing in this story, I'd have enough for a Big Mac, with fries and a medium soda. You owe me my dinner, author.

This story was once again a reminder that the Computers genre in Creepypasta lacks a lot of things. Run away from it, people, before you know it you'll be flooded with bloody memes and psychotic servers.

That's it.

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