Squidward's Suicide Is Real: Difference between revisions
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He looked about 23, was dressed professionally and carrying a baby carrier. He apologized for being late but told us he had to pick up his daughter. He handed us a shopping bag full of signed posters, DVDs, and framed drawings.
She handed him six dollars and looked through her treasures to verify their validity. Everything looked good except for a burnt DVD in a clear case saying
He said he didn't know what it was, but it was probably from the editing room.
I asked why he was letting all this go. He told me it reminded him of his father too much.
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That Friday, she invited me to come over and watch her new DVDs. I had nothing to do so I went over.
Of course, her one bedroom apartment was wall to wall SpongeBob. She seemed to have every SpongeBob product on the planet from her rugs to her ceiling fans to her soap and shower curtains. She told me it was her dream to live in bikini bottom, and if she couldn't live there she wanted to help create it. We finally poured some wine and sat down to watch the five new retail copies of
When we were finished with them it was already one in the morning but I noticed the burnt DVD on the coffee table. I asked if she wanted to just see what it was really quick then call it a night.
We put the DVD in. Before the episode it played a movie countdown. It played
The only thing was there would be a pop once in a while. Like someone edited in a picture for a single frame. It took a while to sync the pause button with the pictures but what I found was truly disturbing.
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There were pictures of different children, they all looked about 6 or 7 and had been badly beaten. We thought maybe someone paid the neighborhood kids to wear bruise makeup for this sick gag. The pictures stopped popping out and the episode continued as usual. She told me to take it out, that it was a fake and therefore so was everything else she had purchased. However, what we found next was a little more serious.
The next episode on the disc was
It was almost like popular creepypasta that I had later found described. It looked like badly drawn fan art with red smudges all over it. It started out with no audio.
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I wanted to take it out and destroy it but I had to see what this was, I had to know that this was a sick joke and those children were alright. I continued watching it.
It was just more of badly drawn Squidward crying. I unmuted her TV and there was this horrible noise that sounded like a combination of static, a hurricane, screaming children, and laughing. I put it on mute again. Squidward stared straight ahead for a while with his creepy bleeding eyes. I wondered what horrific noise they put behind this. I took it off mute again but it was silent. Then a booming voice said
Squidward took a shotgun and blew his head off. Then the usual credits began to roll.
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