THE MENACING MISCHIEF OF THE ULTIMATE POWER IN THE UNIVERSE STORY OF SHAGSONATH THE SPACE WARRIOR THE MILKY WAY ODYESSY ACROSS THE GALAXY ULTIMATE REVELATION PART I FINDING THE SHUTTLECOCK (EBOOK): Difference between revisions
THE MENACING MISCHIEF OF THE ULTIMATE POWER IN THE UNIVERSE STORY OF SHAGSONATH THE SPACE WARRIOR THE MILKY WAY ODYESSY ACROSS THE GALAXY ULTIMATE REVELATION PART I FINDING THE SHUTTLECOCK (EBOOK) (view source)
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__NOTOC__
==== ''INTRO'' ====
''WARNING/ACHTUNG - If you read this Ebook without the Shagsonath theme you will die
from Space Jihad and go to Al Jahannam!!''
''The Song: CCCC3 C4C3C4C3C4 X2 EEEE3 E4E3E4E3E4 X2, CCCC3 ACACA X2 CCCCCCCkdjsghkjzehcgfyer''
==== ''CHAPTER 1'' ====
''Chapter 1 - Beginning of the beginning of the ultimate uprsing of Space Jihad
through the power and predestination of Space Allah, or just Allah; descendant
of Al Nasir Salah Al Din Ab Yusuf Ibn Ayyub, Shagsonath I, also descendant of
Elon Mosque I, II and Shesh Makesh I, II, III, IV, V and LXIX.''
Elon Mosque I was the sole inventor of Space Jihad, finding ridicule in his day,
Line 51 ⟶ 46:
Soon he would move to the Booyah Desert to begin his training.
==== ''CHAPTER 2'' ====
''Chapter 2: The primitive age of the ultimate task in the universe for the ways
and the power of Space Jihad; invasion of aliens that disrupt the longest Ramadan
on the red planet Booyah Desert.''
Booyah was a wasteland, full of nothing but sand and some plants.
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Ramadan must end.
==== ''CHAPTER 3'' ====
''Chapter 3: The space race for the power of the ultimate power in the universe
known as the Shuttlecock Ancient Gear, left by ancient alien SDFs to now be used
for Space Jihad versus the robotical alien overlord, lord of the alien armada of
aliens Zark Muckerburg.''
Zark Muckerburg, son of the late Mark Zuckerburg is a Neptunian alien of Neptune
Line 163 ⟶ 156:
Shagsonath and Deeta were now in the recesses of the tunnel.
==== ''CHAPTER 4'' ====
''Chapter 4: The ultimate Chungular quest to find the Shuttlecock under the volcano -
a sparring match with Big Chungus on his space return for directions and a sword for ultimate
powerful metal Space Jihad and five-minute crafts.''
The tunnels were dark, but the brightness of Maximum Coolness lit like the sun.
Deeta was uneasy, maybe just in awe of how epic games poggers cool Shagsonath was.
At last she spoke:
"Oh, Shagsonath, I want to have your Jihad space-babies!"
"In due time, Deeta," Shagsonath graciously replied, "We cannot until we are married, or
else that is space-Haram."
A loud noise, such as a rock rolling or similarly large and noisy rolling object that wasn't your mum
had begun to get closer and closer. A giant blue furball was chasing them down the tunnel and into
the vestibule.
After the shape crashed, it was revealed to have been none other than Big Chungus.
As he unrolled himself, with a transformers sound effect, he turned to greet Shagsonath.
"Sorry 'bout that, Doc. Mind tellin' your name?"
"I am Shagsonath I, son of Shesh Makesh LXIX, from Shesh Makesh V, IV, III, II, I and
Elon Mosque II and I; I am the sole heir to Al Nasir Salah Al Din Ab Yusuf Ibn Ayyub."
"You're the Shagsonath?" he exclaimed.
"Yes."
There is a cat outside my house. He movin', he schmovin', cute ginger cat.
Mucho jalapeño viento.
Back to the task at hand, Shagsonath was challenged to a friendly duel, a duel to
last all time.
Shagsonath prepared his deck.
As a child, he had spent countless cash money on SchmAmazon to build the ultimate deck in
the universe. They shuffled each other's decks then, then drew five cards.
In space card games, there is no banlist, therefore Shagsonath plays Pot of Greed twice.
However, Chungus stopped his plans to summon Exodia by discarding Droll & Lock Bird.
Shagsonath plays his new strategy, he would fuse himself with the exodia pieces in his hand.
"I play Super Polymerisation!"
"Naniiii!?"
"Shagzodia! Obliterate!"
Big Chungus was defeated on the first turn. He was not killed dead however, because this
was a children's card game.
"Conglaturations, winnerer! You will now recieve my second most prised possession."
He brandished a knife, brimming with untold hotness.
"This is the 1000* degree knife, it is so hot it is literally a thousand degrees!"
Chungus procured it to Shag Sonath.
"Thank," Shagsonath thanked him, "'Twas a valiant effort."
On cue, by chance only seen by great timing on the cue of good timed event flow,
the opposite door opened. Following was a noselike, nasaly laugh.
"Ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha!"
==== ''CHAPTER 5'' ====
''Chapter 5: The Menacinger Mischiefer of the other ultimate power in the universe,
the blood-man who was phone, Dickward III the Torture of Dickward II the Balls of
Dickward I the cock who opposes Shagsonath as the Antijihad nouveau who guards
the Shuttlecock with his IDD (Instant Death Disease).''
"Deeta I, stay back!" Shagsonath exclaimed, "This is one sussy impostor!"
Deeta and Big Chungus left the room as Shagsonath confronted the demon in front
of hissen.
He was blue (dabbe dee dabba die) and humanoid. Alien and evil, nose dick-shaped,
with the voice of a missing father figure. He was tall, strong, not sexy like
Shagsonath, though. He laughed again as he steppingly stepped out of the shadowy
shadows of Shuttlecock darkness.
"Ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha!" he bellowed.
"I've been space-expecting you, Shagsonath."
"Who are you?"
More laughing followed.
"I am Phone, I am the Antijihad, the uncle you can never Bob, the bacon you
forgot to label that your mates feasted on: I am Dickward!"
He casted the strongest spell known to Jihadkind, the Instant Death Disease.
Not at Shagsonath, but Big Chungus!
He died.
Shagsonath looked behind him in horror which turned into rage, only the skeleton
left behind. Shagsonath had an agenda, he must burger to vanquish this foe.
Ow my arm.
==== ''CHAPTER 6'' ====
''Chapter 6: The fight to last until the next time they fight which will last the
whole universe of space where Dickward dies but not really because he comes back
later and my arm still hurts.''
"I'll go easy on you, Sussonath!"
Dickward released a stream of lightning from his hands.
Instead of blocking or dodging, Shagsonath raised his sword and became a rod-like
lightning rod of grounding mastery of lightning. At once, the knife grew into an
actual sword and became hotter than ever.
Nyoom! The lightning was deflected at Dickward, hotter than ever. Dick Ward flew
back and hurted his back and buttocks. Those buttocks were his favourite part.
Anger.
Dickward rose and cast again, this time: The Extreme Ass Itch of Painful Failed
Resistance. Shagsonath's ass began to itch painfully, unjihadly.
"Yahoo!" He yelped, jumping and landing anally.
"Y-y-y-y-y-y..."
He's backwards long jumping to scratch against the floor. On release, he was so fast
that he became QPU aligned and moved back and forth to crash into Dickward II: Electric Boogaloo
a million times.
His jeans were burned away and his buttocks were on fire, blazingly ablaze the cat.
Dickward struggled to recover, while the spell had ended.
"Remember, I am four parallel universes ahead of you." He said.
Sluggishly getting to his feet, Dick coughed up hyperrealistic blood and began punching
Shagsonath repeatedly.
Shagsonath was unmoving like a stone of concentrated Jihadness.
"Why won't you die!?"
"Jihad, son. It hardens in response to parodies."
"Parodies?"
"Mind goblin deez nuts!" He drop kicked Dickward into the Shuttlecock which clanged sexly.
"The memes..." Dickward faded into susdust© and obscurity, leaving the Shuttlecock
unjihaded and unantijihaded.
==== ''CHAPTER 7'' ====
''Chapter 7: The final chapter of part one where the Shuttlecock actually gets found and
the gears of the ancient gear torture the cock and balls of challengers to weed out the weak
before attaching to the actual cock to make boners magnum manganese and shuttle sized
but because it is Shagsonath, the son of a son of a son of a son of a son of a son of a son
of a son of Al Nasir Salah Al Din Ab Yusuf Ibn Ayyub who was a son also, Shagsonath can bone
and debone both chicken legs and dong at will, Dickward will return later on but they only
fight again for real in Part 3 and every other time from now is for the lulz ZOMG EVIL DIXXX
instantly deadified me with his IDD and the Shuttlecock is not to be confused with the
(lowercase) shuttlecock from the hit game badminton and its many space-sequels like Badminton
15: Revenge of the mistreated net.''
Imminent to the Shuttlecock as Space Allah was to Shagsonath, Shagsonath imminently placed his
imminently imminent hand imminently and became closer to the Shuttlecock than his jugular vein.
As he caressed the metal monkey milker, he began to feel a tortuous pain as his cock and balls
were tortured and his testacles (pronounced 'test-uh-clees') began to bakuganize into Bakugan
balls.
Shagsonath stuck his feet to the ground and gritted his teeth. Was this the science behind
enlargement pills?
The Shuttlecock began to tear apart, frame-by-frame, to attach to Shagsonath's non-shuttle cock.
The process was excruciating, however, the power of Space Jihad defeated the space pain like a
really effective space-aspirin. The transformation would soon be complete.
The cock is still not shuttle, but the pain becomes less and less, and gains an 'S' so that we
may discover a third Booyah: Spain.
"Mucho jamon viento..." Shagsonath grunted, funny-moustachely, "¡Perfecto rayo fantastico!"
The agony had ended. Shagsonath continued.
"¡Jalapeño jihad-en-spaceo! ¡Muy calliente perro pequeño! ¡Hola, soy dora... soy Shagsonath
guapo!"
The Shuttlecock transformation had been completed and Shagsonath's cock became like the Zark
Muckerburg triangle spacecraft. There was no time to mourn Big Chungus, but Allah would confer
his soul ensouled to Al Jannah for his space Zakah, space Khums and Space Jihad. Deeta was now
strangely inside a cock.
Shagsonath engaged thrust and erupted through the volcano with Deeta at his side, being de-milked
from the Milky Way, his guidance from the power within the power within the power within
the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within
the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within
the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within
the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within the power within
the power within (yeah!) had told him to discharge from our galaxy and travel to the maddening choir
of the Hooyab Tundra at the very centre of the Booyah Desert.
So, uh... He found the Shuttlecock, everyone go home now. Jajajajajaj.
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