The Long As Shit Story: Difference between revisions

"Shit", I thought to myself as I passed out. "My mom must have planted some weird drugs in my drink to try to kill me again!" As aforementioned, I then passed out.

 

When I came too, it looked like I was actually outside of Peach's castle in Super Mario 64. "Such graphics. Much realistic. Wow", I muttered in amazement. All of a sudden, Captain Falcon jumped out and shouted, "Show me the moves, bitch!" He prepared to do the dreaded FAAAALLLCOON PUUUUNNNCHHHHH! But I kicked him in the shin, and then he exploded. A giant dildo flew out of the explosion and smacked me in the face. Then Mario, Luigi, Peach and Yoshi ran out of the castle towards me.

" Mama Mia, thank you for getting rid of that-a-asshole!", exclaimed Mario. I turned towards Luigi. "Wait, you're not supposed to be in this game!" I exclaimed.

"Mama fucker", Luigi cussed as he dissolved into a bright glowing light.

 

 

Then Captain Falcon reanimated as a walker because this world apparently runs by The Walking Dead rules, where you reanimate upon death. However, Daryl Dixon showed up and killed the Falcon walker. Then Mario and the others ushered me into the castle. "I'm-a-so sorry to tell you-a-this", Mario explained, "but you've been-a-trapped within this-a-game!" "Oh cool", I muttered nonchalantly. "But the only way to send you-a-back, is if you enter some of the-a-pictures in the castle and collect enough of the-a-power stars."