The day my dad kicked me out of the house and I was forced to go outside for more than 5 minutes and it was horrible: Difference between revisions

On a very sunny June afternoon, I was sitting in my house watching a bunch of hentai when my dad comes in and starts yelling at me for some reason. He said that I'm a lazy piece of shit who needs to get outside for more than 2 minutes at a time and that he wishes his son was athletic and not a retarded weeaboo who jacks off to anime girls (even though he's just a fat piece of shit that gets welfare and masturbates all day, the fatass still told me to go outside even though I'm 97% positive that he hasn't been outside for more than 10 minutes at a time in his entire life). He kicked me out of the house and said to go get a job and do something productive, otherwise he would throw out my computer and all my 69 body pillows. I couldn't get back in, so I decided to go do some other stuff for a while.

 

 

I was hiding in the trees to hide myself from the sun and all of my relatives that see me outside and might say some stupid shit like "Hey Tommy, do you want to go fishing with us?" Eventually though, some douchebag chucked a rock at me and I fell out of the trees and had to be out in the sun. I was about to die because I hadn't been out in the sun that long in my entire life and I felt like pulling a Cobain, but I didn't have a shotgun at hand. Turns out that person was no other than Mitt Romney. He beat me with his 72 inch dick and it was worse than the time that my dad beat me with the belt. It was the worse than the time I only got to jack off 10 times in one day. Then a skeleton popped out.