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Walker: Texas Ranger Lost Episode: Difference between revisions
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{{D}}
When Leslie, a totally unisex name, arrived at the airport he saw something unfamiliar. It was his pet cat in the baggage return. He went to go pull his cat, Fifi, out and was successful. Yet, there was still two problems. He didn’t have a pet cat, and his luggage passed already. What the heck was going on!? However she did have a dog named Fifi. Perhaps by some Black magic (totally not racist) his dog was turned into a cat. He knew he shouldn’t have broken up with that witch, but he never believed in crazy-voodoo-creepaloo magic. Oh well, he didn’t care for Fifi anyway so what did she care? So he tied Fifi up to a string and threw him into the baggage return again to retrieve his luggage that just passed. The cat retrieved the luggage but when Leslie went to pull out the cat it’s anus got stuck. “Just forget it!” he/she said. He walked away, without her luggage, leaving the cat behind. Getting into the taxi, he tells the driver “anywhere but here”. So, he takes her to Canada.<br />
While on the road to Canada, she sees a quarter on the road and opens the door and combat rolls out. He picks up the quarter and dusts it off. Then she gets out of the road. Leslie sees a sign that says Texas. He sighs because he doesn't want to pay his taxes. She goes to a saloon and sits down. Orders a tall glass of milk and thinks about what just happened. She wondered why she dove out of the taxi for that quarter. Maybe it was because she was poor. No, that couldn't be right she is affluent. Then he thinks to himself maybe it is because I am Jewish. “Nah, that can’t be it! I pray to the ogrelord every night, no synagogue would ever accept me” he thinks to herself. Taking a big gulp, he slams down her glass and shouts “ANOTHER!!”. To which the bartender quickly replies “ There is no more, cause you drank it all!”. “Drank it all?!” she screams defensively. “We only had one cup!” “Then what the hell did i just drink!? i had like two gallons of that!”. “Oh No!” he exclaims, “You drunk my whale semen lamp.” He then in confusion screams out “That tasted great.” She asks the bartender where she can get more whale semen. He tells the unisex human that she can go to the dock and ask the saltiest of the seamen, Aaron, for his finest semen. She accepts the challenge and marches out of the saloon and whistles for another taxi.<br />
[[File:Gary Oak.jpg|thumb|1x1px|Gary 'Motherfucking' Oak]]
As she rides in a taxi from Dallas to Corpus Christi, he thinks of what this salty seaman will look like and how to find him. She thinks about asking around but she thinks that asking people about the saltiest seaman isn’t a good idea. Then she thinks of just looking for him but that would make too much sense so she decides against it. She decides to lick every seaman he sees. After licking many seamen she finally decides to just sit in one place and wait for him to come to her. A guy smelling of oysters walks up to him and asks “Want to buy some lobsters?” She stands up and licks the man’s forehead. It is the saltiest one he has licked yet. So she asks the man, “ Are you the saltiest seaman?” He replies, “Yes, what can I get you?” The unisex named human jumps around in excitement. She yells, “Can I have your finest semen?” The man looks down at his crotch. She nods her head from side to side and exclaims, “No! Whale semen.” Aaron looks down with disappointment. “50 bucks a bottle” he says sadly. “50 bucks!?!” she exclaims. Aaron then gives an in-depth, disturbingly detailed, story of why it cost $50 a bottle. Leslie almost throws up, then hands him 10 $100 bills. She takes her bottles of “milk” and goes back to Dallas. He has a hard time explaining to the cab driver what it is that is in the bottles, so she doesn’t even try.
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The End.
[[Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT]]
[[Category:Stupid is as the main character does]]
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