Anton the Tampon
From Trollpasta Wiki
One day, Anton, a vampire, was knows as Anton the Tampon for his ability to suck up blood like a fat fuck sucks up a plate of cookies. One day, he found Patrixxx taking a shit off to the side of the bar and asked him 'Yo fat dino dick gtfo befor i bust yo assizle up". Patrixxx said "nofuckyou" and grew tentisticals and climbed out of the window and exploded into shit.
Then an armodildo poopd out n ided
