Audino Wants To Pee

DIS IS A PARODY, EDIT ALL U WANT.

Section heading

Today I decided that I’d desperately need to shit on the Elite Four. My team was pretty weak as hell and stood no chance at all. Shauntal dominated my Pokémon easily, as well as Grimsley. This was beginning to become a problem.

After over 9000 loses against the Elite Four and battling the trainers in the stadiums, I knew there was only one option left, Audino.

Audino gives a lot of EXP and EVs when you beat them, so it’s only a natural choice. I set a lucky egg on my Pokémon and went searching.

Luckily there was some grass shaking the moment I went near it, and hey, what do ya know? Audino XD!

I forgot to switch my Emboar out at the beginning,  no matter at least those with EXP share can get some EXP. I hit it with a flamethrower and continued looking for shaking grass.

Usually it’s within 200 steps, luckily about 20 steps in I encountered another Audino. At first I thought it might’ve been shiny since the sprite showed up a bit darker, but disregarded that when I saw it was still pink. Might have just been my lighting :'-(.

I decided to use my Galvantula to knock it out with an Electro Ball. That was easy, and she finally grew a level! Well, back to searching.

Something ended up happening… I ran into another Audino. This one was much different though, I looked at its gender and level…male level 14… No different from the last one, it just grew a level. The thing that made this Audino more noticeable were burn-marks caused by electricity being visible on its body. Not only that, but when it appeared, its cry was much longer and dragged on, and had a bit of a cry added to it.

I decided the easiest way to get this fucked up thing out of my sight was too attack it again. I used bug bite this time and luckily enough, it gained a critical hit and knocked Audino right out.

I was done with this. I didn’t wanna get a visit from that disturbing thing again, and went to level grind against Basculins. Sadly, they weren’t showing up for some reason… but i didnt give a flying fuck so i forgot the Audino incident I went back into the grass.

I saw a grass-shaking spot and immediately went for it expecting to beat up a normal Audino.

I was greeted by the same Audino… level 15 in this situation. Except this time it was clear what my Bug Bite did. It tore out one of the Audino’s eyes and hyper realistic blood was sinking down from its socket.

About to hit the FUCKING RUN!!!11 button as soon as it popped up, there was a dialogue before the options showed up… it was Audino…

Audino: Why did you leave me? You were having fun weren’t you? This is what you wanted right?

YES/HELL NO

Instantly I selected Hell No.

Audino: You’re fucking lying to me aren’t you?

Again, I selected Hell no.

Audino: LIAR! Go on with it, you son of a bitch.

The battle began, right at that moment I hit FUCKING RUN!!!11.

Audino: FUCK!

I couldn’t get away, yet for some reason it was my turn again. The only way to get out of this was to attack Audino. I switched over to my Carracosta and used Bite.

The wild Audino fainted.

Phew. That was over… Now I can get on and ignore the grass shaking spots. Suddenly every step I took the grass shook right in front of the direction I was moving to. Audino was stalking me.

I was greeted this time by the Audino, growing in level once again, symptoms growing worse on it as part of its left ear was bitten off. That was my Carracosta’s doing…

Audino: Are you having fun yet?

I selected Hell No again, how could watching this cute Pokémon suffer like this be FUN? I thought Audino was one of the cutest things in the world.

Audino: You’re fucking lying to me again, everyone fucking does this. Go on. Have fun.

The battle began but, what did it mean by everyone does this? Then it hit me, everyone uses Audino for level grinding and EV Training… They abuse how much it gives.

Suddenly Audino said something…

Audino: You know it right? This is how everyone plays with me…

I began to feel a bit sad… but i don't give a shit and hate PETA so i knock it out again… I switched my Pokémon to a Golett and began attacking. Using Strength I easily overpowered the Audino.

Sadly I was getting used to this… even though I didn’t want to… I ran into Audino again, this time its right arm was torn off because of Strength.

Playing it smart, I decided a good way that would probably end this… I flew out of the grass and quickly went to the Pokémon center. I traded over my Haxorus and went to put that Audino out of its misery.

Surely enough, Audino popped out again, and it had a reaction to my Haxorus, its sprite was crying, it looked almost like it was staring directly at me in disappointment.

Audino: You want the fun to end? Really?… but… that’s not fair… why? Why do you want this to end? We’re having fun… Do you want this to end?

I selected Yes.

Audino then used Endure. That wouldn’t work since my Haxorus had mold breaker. I swiftly ended it with a Dragon Claw.

Finally, things can go back to normal… I walked, and once again… Audino showed up.

Hasn’t it had enough already?

The Audino popped up… with the scratches on its chest, lines of hyper realistic blood dripping down from them, saying another set of dialogue once again.

Audino: I’m never going to leave. Hurt me more.

I turned the game off. I couldn’t handle it. I decided to leave it for a few hours and then return. The 3D model of Zekrom had been replaced with EVIL PATRIXXX. Upon pressing start, I was greeted by PATRIXXXS WURLD EET. There was no continue, there was only a New Game. So i press start, And everything was back to normal.

At least… until a wild EVIL PATRIXXX appeared…

A link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHpxXSsFLNg