Caught With My Pants Down

So I was taking a poo-poo one evening and I heard a loud BOOM coming from outside the bathroom door. Shortly after I grabbed the 12-gauge from under my toilet and kicked open my bathroom door with my pants down. To my surprise It was the loch-ness monster, I said, “what do you want loch-ness monster?!” then he said “I need about three fitty.” And I said, “No Loch-ness monster I don’t got three fitty!!.” The next evening I was taking a poo-poo again, because the steak I ate earlier was talking back to me. Then I heard a loud BANG coming from outside the bathroom door, I grabbed my beretta from under my toilet. I head-butted the door open and to my surprise it was the Slenderman . I said ,”What do you want Slenderman!?!” then he said “ I need about twenty dollars.” I said, “No Slenderman I only got five dollars!!!!” then he said, “Fine I only need about three fitty.” I stared at him for a moment and said, “You ain’t Slenderman!!!!.” And then I ripped of his mask, it was the Loch-ness monster again. I said, “what do you want loch-ness monster!?!?” He said, “I need about three fitty.” Then I shot him.