ClOUd.EXE: Difference between revisions

It said, "Enough. The distraction served its purpose. Now, it is time for the truth to be revealed…revealed..." The screen faded to black. When the screen came back, it showed Cloud during the scene where he has to dress like a woman in order to get in the gentlemen's club to find Tifa. The camera was focused completely on Cloud in his feminine attire. Then, the dialogue came back. "Cloud…Cloud... How my heart longs for you! I know we were enemies at one time, but I cannot get the image of you out of my head. When I saw you in that dress…dress... I knew I had to make you mine somehow. But, I am in a dilemma. I'm not a homosexual, even though I love my swords long and hard. But seeing you in that dress…dress... You were meant to be a woman. I am convinced of this. And so, I will make you mine, Cloud! I will free you from the literal balls and chain that weigh you down. Then, we will be together forever…forever..." What in the name of fuck did I just read?

In the next scene, everything was pitch black. Then, Sephiroth appeared on the screen with Aerith's dead body (no hyper realistic blood this time) and Cloud's dead body. At that moment, everything came together a little. I was like, "Unholy Deception, Batman! Sephiroth was distracting me the whole time when I was 'playing the game.' That's why Samus looked so confused. She wasn't in the right game and she knew it! I bet all of the characters knew something was wrong, and that's why they were arguing in front of Shinra's building. And poor Pikachu…Pikachu... He must've been deprived of a female's attention for so long, he just couldn't control his urges and had to give Samus the 'Hip Thrust.' What a tragedy! A male shouldn't ever be deprived of sexual pleasure for so long, even if he is just a rat with fur dyed yellow wearing pink blush and can only squeak out his name." Then, Sephiroth started to talk again.

"Alas, I cannot be with you as you are now, Cloud. So, I will take your manhood away from you and you shall become a woman. But, you will need a female's body for this to work. This is why I have chosen Aerith. And now, I must begin my work…work..." The screen faded black and the sound of metal cutting through flesh was heard. This went on for a minute. When everything was done, I could not believe what I saw. Cloud and Aerith were no longer there. Now, there was Lightning from Final Fantasy XIII and its sequels.

Little hearts appeared over Sephiroth's head as he looked over his work, apparently very pleased with what he had just done. Then, he spoke. "It is done! I have created a marvelous work! From the darkest Cloud, I have brought forth…forth... Lightning!" The screen faded black, and a text box appeared. "Lightning and Sephiroth went to live on Destiny Islands. There, they had two sons, one named Sora and the other Riku. With the birth of Sora, Lightning and Sephiroth got into a huge argument, divorced and Sephiroth left with Riku and Riku and Sora would grow up, never knowing they were truly brothers." After that, the game went to the FFXIII start screen and all of the color drained from my face. I completely lost it and just screamed at the top of my lungs. 'NO! NO! NOT THIS ABOMINATION! ANYTHING BUT THIS SHIT!' No matter how loud I screamed or how much I freaked out, the fact still remained that I was now in possession of a copy of Final Fantasy XIII. I reset my computer, took the game out and tried to download it again, but it would always start up with the Final Fantasy XIII start screen. I dropped to my knees in tears.