Get Out Of My Way: Difference between revisions
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The year was 1987. I was 16, and working at my first minimum wage job. It went as well as any minimum wage job goes. Dealing with the usual customers, stocking shelves, the typical stuff. However, the course of my entire life on this planet changed for the worse on one fateful autumn day.
The day began as any other. I hopped onto my sleek, black BMX bike and pedaled hastily to the Tesco near where I lived (I worked there). I walked in, said hello to my manager, my coworkers, and got on with my shift. I walked into the back and to my surprise there was a peculiarly large shipment of. . . sausage rolls. Tesco’s own brand to be exact. This perplexed me. This food item is usually sold out, leaving us with days upon days of empty shelves. I thought to myself,
The day had gone on for some time and I looked at the clock. 6 p.m. Just about the time the usual rush of customers starts to slow down, but today was strangely different. I don’t know why, but at 6:10 sharp something URGED me to look towards our front door.
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I could tell just by look in his eyes that this man was on a mission, and nothing was stopping him. He made a beeline towards the aisle in which we stock our sausage rolls. Tesco store brand sausage rolls were of no laughing matter around these parts. Customers would travel from all parts of the country to swarm the many other Tesco stores, burdening the poor minimum wage retail workers with their vile swarm of impish rage. Understanding this, I realized something. This man was enraged at the thought that he might not be able to get his sausage rolls. I saw him enter the aisle, and when he noticed we were out of stock his demeanor, and my life, changed forever.
I approached him with a cautious gait. He just stood there menacingly, gazing with hollow eyes at our recently emptied shelves. Somehow, I knew what he was looking for. As I began to approach, I said to him,
He grunted in approval, and I worked my way towards the back of the store. I had remembered back to earlier that day, when I had seen many pallets filled with Tesco brand sausage rolls. I burst through the back warehouse doors, somehow knowing that this business had a certain unexplained urgency. However, to my surprise, everything was gone. Every last package of sausage rolls were gone. WHERE DID THEY GO? I felt absolutely sick to my stomach, almost as if I could vomit. What would I say to this man, who had obviously traveled far and wide in search of delicious Tesco brand sausage rolls? My mind began racing as I ventured back out onto the sales floor.
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There was no time. Just before he made his way to me, he effortlessly slashed his way through an aisle filled with customers, ravaging their bodies into tragically unidentifiable pulps. I was almost in awe at the unholy strength and tenacity being exhibited right before my eyes, but there was nothing that could’ve prepared me for the sound of his voice...dripping with abhorrence at my apparent misdeed.
His impish caterwauling was other-worldly. His near-ethereal gurgle cut through the tormented and harrowing screams of women and children throughout the store. Thus spoke the devil,
To this day, his words still echo within the depths of my subconscious. My life has been meaningless ever since.
Surprisingly enough, I haven’t heard of any other incidents. The scariest part of it all is that this man; this THING, could still be at large. Can I even call this THING a man? I shudder at the thought of such an infernal, demonic entity still loose within this world. God help us all.
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