How to summon Fappy Appy: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 14:48, 23 June 2015
The Ritual
- Go and buy a white van.
- Gather these materials: A computer, a plank of wood, an iPhone 4s, an apple, a cactus, a sex toy, a cassette tape of the Star Wars Christmas Special, some donkey sperm, and a lemon meringue pie.
- Go inside the van.
- Take the apple and dip it in the sperm.
- Take the cactus, stick it into the pie, and throw it by the apple.
- Put the cassette tape and play it on the computer.
- Order a pizza using the iPhone 4s.
- When the pizza arrives, hit it with the plank until the tomato sauce squirts out.
- Make a Satanic sacrificial circle with the sauce and wrap the pizza around the pie.
- Play Darude-Sandstorm on the computer but keep the video playing, it should be halfway done now.
- Then chant these words: "Poopy Butts, Poopy Butts, Playing in the Mud. Fuckity Fuck, Fuckity Fuck, Get Gud" to the tune of Sandstorm and throw the sex toy into the circle.
- There you go, Fappy Appy should appear in the circle in front of you and the ritual is done.