I Got a Strange Episode of Sesame Street Mailed to Me: Difference between revisions
I Got a Strange Episode of Sesame Street Mailed to Me (view source)
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{{NSFW}}
I used to love Sesame Street when i was a mere fetus, much like everyone else. I used to tune into it every single time it was on, loving the all the characters and songs and whatnot, it was the peak of my childhood. Yes, those were the
However, my views on this simple show meant for young children would be completely shattered (alongside several other things) one fateful day when i got that
It was a nice Saturday afternoon; i was browsing twitter, harassing stupid teenagers for liking things i disapproved of. I was about to whip my meat out and go wham one out to whatever filth peaked my interest at that moment, but then the doorbell rang. I got up and went to my front door, opened it, got on the floor, walked the dinosaur, and said hello to the mailman.
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"Yo, uh, got a package for a Mr. Dongus Mcfuckfarts. Seems rather light."
I took the package off of his hands, signed some release form that i think was to absolve them of all responsibility if i got mailed a pipebomb, and went back inside to see what it was. I hadn't ordered anything online in quite some time, so i was pretty sure they got the wrong address. But no, that was clearly my address and name on the box, and by god, this was meant for
I opened the package up and inside was a small piece of paper. On the piece of paper, there was some small writing that said: "you need to know the truth. go to your bedroom."
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Elmo laughed and said "Well, Elmo's gonna go home and get ready. See you at 1 o'clock!" He then walked off towards his home, leaving the blue pastry-gobbling moron to his own devices.
However, just as Elmo left, a figure emerged from the background and approached Cookie Monster. That
He had a mask on, was wearing a heavy black coat, some baggy brown pants that went down to his ankles, hiking boots, and gloves on; he looked like he was planning to go to Antartica. And his, voice, good god his voice. He spoke in a tone so gnarly that made me wince every time he opened his mouth. He then suddenly snatched poor Cookie Monster by the ass with one hand and covered his mouth with the other.
"
I was appalled when i heard those words, who the fuck would break into the set of a family-friendly show and violate one of the puppets dressed like the invisible man? The figure then unzipped his pants to reveal his girthy peenus weenus and shoved it inside Cookie Monster, making him scream "NOOOOOOOOOOO! HELP! HELP ME PLEASE!" His screams sounded nothing like his usual self, as if the actual actor was in pain.
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