My Life With a Satanic Antivirus: Difference between revisions
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the computer still ran really fucking slow. I decided I needed an antivirus. I
went onto the web and searched for legit anti-viruses. The problem was that the
ones that weren't shit had trial versions for free. I
starting to give up after a few hours of searching. I was thinking about
trashing this thing and try to get my money back.
Line 61:
After the thing finally shut up, I
went onto internet explorer, but it was different. The homepage
anymore, it was a new engine called Super Satan Demonic Search. I was spooked. I
ignored it and went to the steam website, which had a red tint for some reason.
Line 127:
this fucking antivirus was doing its job. I went to the control panel to uninstall
it, but when I tried to, the Robot Hell song from Futurama started playing on
loop.
church, and the Priest picked up.
Line 135:
Satan himself" I yelled
"What are you talking about? Computers
exist" he said.
Line 172:
I took the pizza and then flushed the dead guy down my toilet. I got back to
the laptop, which was still on fire and now playing MIDI's backwards. Oh and
the depressed cows were still screaming at me.
do? I decided to unplug the laptop's charger and wait for it to run out of
battery so I could use it again. After about 4 minutes, the laptop ran out of
Line 222:
decided that enough was enough! I was going to get rid of this evil thing once
and for all! I decided to go onto the spooky search and look up 'how to get rid
of evil computer Satan.
memes, and Kermit x Fozzie fanfictions. Then the antivirus window came up and said
that I must give myself to Satan to free the computer. I said no. It asked why
Line 244:
"Hmmm. I think I have a solution. Just upgrade to
windows 10. It
"Fuck you, Bill" I said as I hung up.
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