SoNic's SeX sLaVe
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Chapter 1: The Flea Market
Some people ask me why I have these scars on my testicles, I don't like to talk about it... But I might as well type about it on a website for everyone to see... This is my story...
I guess you should know that i'am a HUGE Sonic fan, so much so that I jack off to my totally kawaii desu fan character, Fire the Flamehog. She's Amy, BUT RED!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!!!!!!! I know you want to hear more about her, but I don't have the time for that.
I guess I should start at the beginning, I was at my house, jacking off to SonicxAmy porn, when I saw a pop-up ad. I was about to select the "X" symbol on window for it, but I noticed that the ad said "Go to your local flee market." Following the advice of the ever so mystical pop-up, I got in my car and drove to the flee market, hitting a few pedestrians on the way. When I got to the flee market, I noticed there was a 50% off sale for used games...
"Oh gee Wilkerson!!! Games for 50% off?!" I exclaimed. This deal was WAY to good to be true! I slammed my car door open, ripping it off it's hinges, but I didn't care, there was a deal for video games!!1!1! I ran through the crowds of people, launching them through the air as they made contact with me, at the end of it all, there was at least 60 casualties. I looked through the piles of games that were for sale. The games that were for sale included some piece of shit called Nintendo World Championships or some shit, it was in a gold case to signify it's shittyness. I threw the cartridge on the ground and spawned a sledgehammer from nowhere and beat the ever loving fuck out of it until it was nothing more than a pile of scraps.
That's when I noticed "it", the "game" that will always haunt my nightmares. It was kind of disk that you would find in your attic. It was crudely written in sharpie, it said "SaNiC's SeX sLaVe". WOW!1 a Sonic game?! What was this game? I've never heard of it, why did Sega make it? Were they trying to appeal to fans? I didn't give two Super Sonic shits, because I grabbed the game and bought it before I knew it. Seriously, it's a weird problem I have where I do something without knowing it, I think I need help.
I got in my car, and before I started it, the disk's crudely drawn label turned into hyper realistic blood, I wrote it off as a glitch and drove home. When I got home I sped up into my room and literally threw the disk into my computer's disk slot, the slot wasn't open so the disk hit the computer and fell to the floor. I picked it up and opened my computer's slot, I inserted the disk and started the program on the disk. The program was called "Ur mAh SlAve.exe" I was a little scared and I selected the "start game option", the computer froze for a second, in that split second I noticed an image.
The image was of Jeff the Killer butt fucking Smile Dog, in the background SlenderMan was fisting a goat, next to Slendy was the Elegy of Emptiness statue bleeding from the eyes whilst making balloon animals and giving them to children. In the middle of it all, was Sonic himself, but looked different, he was wearing a skirt for no god damn reason. I pondered it for a bit, and wrote it off as a glitch.
End of Chapter 1...
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