The Day My Computer Was Filled With Gerbil Porn: Difference between revisions
The Day My Computer Was Filled With Gerbil Porn (view source)
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One day I was surfing the internet, as usual (fyuck you, don't judge me). Suddenly, I came upon a strange YouTube video link labeled "The Ballad of Richard Gere". Thinking this was fucking stupid, I clicked on it anyway, because I liek stoopid shit. It started buffering for an inordinate period of time, and I was like WTF!!! Then I realized the video was only 1 minute and 43 seconds long. Just as I was about to hit the " back" button on my browser, it finished loading. I could not fucking believe what I saw! The video faded in on Richard Gere standing against a Christmas themed background, wearing a Santa costume (this makes no sense, but FUCK LOGIC!). He mumbled something under his breath that I couldn't make out (giggity!), and walked off screen with a disgruntled expression on his face. After 10 seconds the song "Livin on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi faded in, but the lyrics were different:
He says, "We've gotta hold on to our buttocks<br>
It doesn't make a difference if we spread them or not<br>
We've got 5 gerbils inside and that's a lot.<br>
For love we'll give it a shot."
[Chorus:]<br>
Whoa, we're half way queer<br>
Whoa, livin' like Richard Gere<br>
Bite down on this rag - they're crawling deep in your rear<br>
Whoa, another part goes here
Jimmy's got a firm grasp on his cock<br>
Now he's holding in gerbils<br>
He took from a purple tube sock<br>
So deep, they're deep
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The End
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...and then a gerbil popped out
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