The Lost "666 Things to Do to Ensure You Go To Hell" List.

I used to work for a company that made an app that makes lists digitally. That was, until June 6th, 2006, at 6:06:06 AM. That exact date is when the company officially lost the dollar that prevented it from being bankrupt. I was deeply saddened as it was a decent job with decent pay, which was a whole $666 per 6 da Enough about my salary, though.

I heard from one review of the app that a user had killed themselves right after using the app for 6 months, 6 days, and 6 hours. Data on the user's phone revealed a list, called 666 Things to Do to Ensure You Go To Hell, which listed 666 things that would land you a swift and permanent. The user's phone was lost after this user burned the device used to write the list.

It wasn't until now I hacked into the company's database, which is somehow still able to be accessed even though it's defunct and the site should be down, but somehow isn't. It is also said if you read the whole list, you will be haunted by an evil spirit for the rest of your life. Here is the list, next header. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The List.

1. Work for Meth666 Inc.
2. Eat cat shit
3. Eat dog shit
4. Eat any type of shit
5. Write the number 666
6. Worship Satan
7. Write the word Satan on paper
8. Write the word Satan on anything else.
9. Repeat an item but with different wording on a list.
10. Think the number 666 is lucky
11. Be a cannibalistic asshole.
12. Be named Dave
13. Be named Ethan
14. Be named Mia Laurence XI
15. Have roman numerals in your name
16. Visit Facebook often
17. Use social media
18. Create lists
19. Be hypocritical to try to be funny
20. Tell jokes
21. Be non-serious at any moment in time
22. Yeah, even when your friend releases a 50-gallon rotten-egga'.
23. Have a dog named Chad
24. Have a dog named Charley
25. Not naming your dog anything other than Chas will have you hanged by the nipples.
26. Eat a taco while standing on NO FEETS
27. Like pineapple on pizza
28. Support those who like pineapple on pizza
29. Be born in the year 1990 - 2002.
30. Put tomatoes in your neighbor's eyes while they are asleep. Looking (or not, now that you've blinded me) at you, Dave!!!!!!!!!!!
31. Be from the state of Ohio
32. Be from the state of Michigan
33. Be born in Finland
34. Fit any stereotypes that exist or will exist
35. Be normal
36. Listen to Daft Punk
37. Blast the song "HAPPYJOYHAPPYHAPPYJOYHAPPYJOYHAPPY" at 3:33AM in the damn morning
38. Be awake during 3:33AM or any time between 3:00AM - 3:59:59AM
39. Be late for work even though it's literally one fucking step from your damn home
40. Commit suicide
41. Support suicide victims
42. NOT support attempted suicide victims
43. Listen to anything by Drake
44. Listen to any music tied to religion
45. Listen to songs about ponies
46. Worship any higher figure
47. Say that Patrick from the hit animated show SpongeBob SquareDance should go to Hell
48. Say that SpongeBob should NOT go to HELL
49. 7734
50. Look for greatness where you know it isn't possible
51. Laugh too much
52. Live at the coordinates N 37 46 57.642", W 122 23 54.123".
53. Eat insects
54. Own the game GTA Vice City in any way, shape, or form.
55. Play GTA San Andreas in a way that constitutes as having arsonistic intentions for the surrounding players or onlookers of your gameplay.
56. IGNORE THE CONSTISTUION1!1
57. GO AGAINST THE MOTHAFUGGIN USA
58. Be un-patriotic
59. Do not support the army of your nation
60. Do not go against political figures that clearly deserve it
61. Drive a 1969 Chevy model
62. Be a ricer
63. Modify your car to the point of ugliness (see #62)
64. Destroy the N64
65. Destory the SNES
66. Destroy the NES
67. Destroy the Gameboy Color & other variants
68. be part of the furry fandom
69. Send NSFW content to anyone named Sally
70. Google pictures of the Earth's roundness because you're retarded enough to believe Earth isn't round
71. Be part of the Flat Earth Society
72. Encourage belief in the Flat Earth Theory
73. Defend the Flat Earth Theory
74. Make any video about the Flat Earth Theory that does not involve debunking it.
75. Post pastas on the wrong site
76. Be an internet troll
77. Be of the Orc species
78. Leave crums exactly a pixel in length, width, height, and mass.
79. Violate the CC-BY-SA license
80. Violate the Creative Commons Sharealike License
81. Violate any CC license.
82. Watch pronz in restraunt bathrooms.
83. Moan so loud it wakes up the neighborhood
84. Be part of the EVILNUSS PREVENTASS SQAD that kills innocents for no reason other than blood, gore, and tongue cutting.
85. Travel on Route 69 in 1969.
86. Time travel!
87. Bend reality
88. Gain telekanis
89. Read the Communist Manifesto
90. Read Harmonic Illusions in Science by Hemson L. Johnathan
91. Use a pen-name.
92. Hide your identity
93. Lie
94. Gamble
95. Drink alcoholic beverages
96. Go to casinos
97. Pay the rent for someone else
98. Borrow a used condom
99. Be a trap
100. Be attracted to traps