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Vladimir Putin and Ivan Drago the Machoke: Difference between revisions
Vladimir Putin and Ivan Drago the Machoke (view source)
Revision as of 22:32, 4 September 2014
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It was getting late however, and it was almost time to go to sleep. And the President of Russia needs his sleep if he wants to make sure the country runs in tip-top shape, right? They Trainer and Pokemon retired to Putin’s personal bed, where they slept together in an embrace that could make any married couple jealous. These two were meant for each other. While he slept, Putin dreamed about taking Ivan to Pokemon tournaments where he would be able to mercilessly defeat the entire competition and take home first prize. He would even beat out that pesky Barack Obama and his award-winning Dragonite, along with that weirdo Kim Jong Un and his Croagunk.
[[File:Barack and dragonite.jpg|thumb|273x273px|Barack Obama and his Award-Winning Dragonite.]][[File:Kimmy and croagunk.jpg|left|thumb|
▲<nowiki> </nowiki>On the contrary, Ivan dreamed of riding on a ferris wheel with his newfound master, in the summer sun at a fun carnival. However, this dream suddenly turned into a nightmare when Ivan remembered that he had a terrible fear of heights! As the ferris wheel he and his master rode on climbed higher and higher, Ivan felt his bladder loosen. He began to urinate in his dream at a frightening pace due to his fears, and his urine began to fill up the ferris wheel cart they were in. As the urine level rose higher and higher, it spilled out of the cart and caused it to start tipping over. It continued tipping until Ivan, Putin, and their popcorn fell out of the cart and through the air.
The shock caused Ivan to awake in a hurry, only to find that he had soiled his undergarments in real life as well as his dream. His trademark Machoke briefs and champion belt had to come off. The Pokemon reluctantly removed these articles of clothing from his body, and the now-naked Machoke returned to the bed next to Vladimir Putin. He hoped that he wouldn’t get urine on the bed sheets since his penis was still moist with the stuff, and the last thing he wanted to do was make his new master unhappy. Now, when Pokemon have trademark articles of clothing (like Machoke and Scraggy for example) attached to them, it becomes a part of their identity and it even ties directly to their self-worth. This was also true in Machoke’s case. Even with a ripped body and giant purple penis, Ivan felt insecure being naked without his clothes. This caused him to seek consolation elsewhere.
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