Vladimir Putin and Ivan Drago the Machoke: Difference between revisions

 

Once he was back in Moscow, Putin clapped his hands for five minutes, and ran like an excited child back to the Kremlin. He immediately took out the Pokeball containing Machoke. He leisurely tossed the ball into the air, causing Machoke to be sent out. “MACHOKE!” it roared. It was happy to be with Putin. Putin looked up at the creature, and decided upon a name for it. It came from the hit movie series, Rocky Balboa. He decided to name the Pokemon after a Russian boxer in one of the movies- Ivan Drago. Yes- it fit perfectly! He named him Ivan Drago on the spot. They embraced again, as the Machoke was happy with its new name. Putin was so enthusiastic, that he wanted to start training him that instant…

It was getting late however, and it was almost time to go to sleep. And the President of Russia needs his sleep if he wants to make sure the country runs in tip-top shape, right? They Trainer and Pokemon retired to Putin’s personal bed, where they slept together in an embrace that could make any married couple jealous. These two were meant for each other. While he slept, Putin dreamed about taking Ivan to Pokemon tournaments where he would be able to mercilessly defeat the entire competition and take home first prize. He would even beat out that pesky Barack Obama and his award-winning Dragonite, along with that weirdo Kim Jong Un and his Croagunk.

 

On the contrary, Ivan dreamed of riding on a ferris wheel with his newfound master, in the summer sun at a fun carnival. However, this dream suddenly turned into a nightmare when Ivan remembered that he had a terrible fear of heights! As the ferris wheel he and his master rode on climbed higher and higher, Ivan felt his bladder loosen. He began to urinate in his dream at a frightening pace due to his fears, and his urine began to fill up the ferris wheel cart they were in. As the urine level rose higher and higher, it spilled out of the cart and caused it to start tipping over. It continued tipping until Ivan, Putin, and their popcorn fell out of the cart and through the air.