Anime.exe
Watashi wa
Hello, I am a weeaboo. I originally had a less Japanese name, but I changed my name to Eren Jaeger since it was from that attack on Titan show, which is japanese, and it had a character named Eren Jaeger, the coolest japanese name ever. I own several great body pillows which are my waifus.
Creepy file です
I was walking home with my newly bought Asuka from Evangelion body pillow. People call me a pedophile because her character is 14, but she's 2D so it's totally ok. when I got home I went on my computer to go on kissanime and watch some great shows like highschool of the dead, sword art online, and boku no pico. Before I got to watch these sugoi shows, I received an e-mail, something that is very rare for me. In the e-mail it said," watch this Kawaii sugoi show, you won't regret it". I downloaded the file which said "anime.exe", which sounded kinda fucking spooky. I went to go get my instant ramen and said, "Itadakimasu!" before opening the file. What I saw would change my life forever.
The spooky part です
What I saw next made me shit my pants and want to fuck my body pillows for comfort. At first I saw Cory Baxter on the screen, everything was ok for now. But then I saw hyper realistic blood coming from his eyes. Next I saw Lain on the screen (why the fuck do people enjoy this show it can't compare with sword art online) and she was using her 1337 haxor skillz to fuck up my computer. I couldn't exit the file now. Next I saw all my favourite waifus calling my name and asking me to turn into a 2D guy. They said the only way I could do this is if I was killed by sonic.exe. Next sonic.exe appeared on the screen and then I was really spooked. I was too curious to see what would happen, so I played through all of sonic.exe even though I did hear you would die if you played all of it. After that, the file started to play all of Texhnolyze, I sat there watching all of the show, and it spooked me.
The End です
So, after watching texhnolyze, the file closed and I got another e-mail. It said it was from lizard squad. Lizard squad said they were behind everything since they're such 1337 haxorz. They worked together with EA, ubisoft, microsoft, Sony, nintendo, Activision, Square Enix, and even fucking Konami. They said they were part of the illuminati and that the contents of anime.exe would cause me to commit suicide.
So I did.
The End.
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