Brady Bunch Banned Episode
"The Brady Bunch" wasn't actually a hit in the 70s when it originally aired, but got most of its fans due to years of reruns. Unlike family sitcoms today, "Brady Bunch" never went into any topics that were too serious; I think the most distressing problem they ever had was when the girls saw Greg smoking a cigarette. Of course he was cured of his addiction by the end of the half hour, and everything was dandy until the next week's adventure.
One of the episodes that makes me laugh to this day is "Bobby's Hero," (Season 4, Episode 17), where Bobby develops a fixation on the 1800's outlaw Jesse James. Even going so far as to write a book report about him, Bobby had romanticized Jesse as a Wild West hero. Until one night, he had a dream:
Bobby and his family are riding a train, dressed in 19th century garb. They're the only ones on the train (and all sitting on the same side). Suddenly, Jesse James breaks into the train and demands everyone throw their wallets and purses in the aisle for him. The family is terrified, except for Bobby; he jumps up and says "Wow, I never thought I'd get to meet you!... (You're) a great guy!" After Jesse's collected everyones belongings, he orders them to turn away from him and face the train windows.
"Why are you doing that, Jesse?" Bobby asks. "So I can shoot them, of course!" is Jesse's reply. With that, he begins to walk down the aisle, pointing his gun and yelling "Bang!" at each member of the family. He doesn't actually fire the gun, but both parents and each of the kids flail dramatically and slump over in their seats as if dead. Bobby, shocked, screams "No, Jesse, No!"
He wakes up from the dream, realizing that--just maybe--Jesse James isn't the cool dude he made him out to be after all. The family's relieved to hear this, and the episode ends on its usual saccharine note.
I used to have a blog where I recapped and commented on TV shows, and wrote an entry about this specific episode of "The Brady Bunch." I mentioned how it reminded me of the old Western movies my dad watches where people will get "shot" but there's never any blood or visible injury. Of course in today's movies and TV shows (depending on the network) bleeding wounds are no big deal. Sitting through ten minutes of the HBO show "Deadwood" would probably have caused the Brady family to spontaneously combust!
I got a handful of comments on my blog from other people who were amused by the episode. A few days after it was posted, I got this e-mail from someone with the address jessejames1973@hotmail.com:
"Saw your post about 417. We wanted to go more 'edgy' and realistic with it, but ABC ordered us to destroy it after seeing the rough cut. Not sure why I kept this, but check it out if you like. I can't leave this up very long and risk being identified by the network. Please DO NOT circulate. Thanks. S."
Below that was a web address which sounded very generic--even though it was no longer operable a few days after I received the e-mail, I won't post it here. And there's no record of it ever being registered, which is bizarre.
Hoping I wasn't setting myself up for a computer virus, I went to the website listed. The page was blank, except for a video posted in the middle. It pre-loaded quickly; it was only about a minute long. It was the 'shooting on the train' portion of the "Brady Bunch" episode; you can find the one that actually aired on YouTube.
This video started off the same; Jesse James orders the family to hand over their wallets and purses, as Bobby excitedly dances around his hero. They're ordered to turn and face the windows, and Bobby asks why. "So I can kill them, of course!" Jesse replies--the first change from the aired episode.
Jesse aims the gun, and instead of yelling "Bang!" he actually shoots each family member. Parents Mike and Carol are first, and blood trickles from the holes in their foreheads. Greg runs up to Jesse to take the gun, but is hit in the center of the chest and falls down on top of Peter, who sobs in fear until he's killed as well. Jan and Marcia, who are holding on to each other and screaming in fright, are each shot several times in the face. One of the bullets is a miss and goes through the window behind them, shattering it.
Cindy, the youngest girl, sits in the frontmost seat and shakes in silence as Jesse slowly walks up the aisle to her, dragging a wide-eyed Bobby along with him. Jesse kneels down and grins at Cindy. "Don't worry, sweetheart," he says. "It'll all be over soon." Turning to Bobby, he holds out his gun. "Still want to be like me?"
Bobby hesitates, then takes the gun and breaks into a huge smile. "Partners?" he asks. Jesse gives him a thumbs up, and Bobby points the gun at Cindy. As he's about to pull the trigger, Cindy holds up her doll, the infamous Kitty Carryall, and the doll gets shot instead. Blood pours out of the doll as Bobby wakes up from his dream. Though startled, he quickly recovers and smiles. "Partners with Jesse James," he whispers. "Wow!"
That was the end of the clip. A sequence like this may have worked in a modern TV show, but in the Brady's world? No way. Besides being too graphic for 70s standards, it was too twisted. I did try using some software to save the video, but it wouldn't work. And, like I said, a few days later, the site no longer worked. Not as if I wanted to watch it over and over; I literally couldn't believe what I'd seen. I wonder if "S." has shared this with anyone else?
Credited to Owlbeseeingyou
Originally uploaded on June 21, 2012
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