BurningTorrent Celebrates the Legalisation of Gay Marriage in The USA: Difference between revisions

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Nearly exploding with happiness, she decided to teleport to
Nearly exploding with happiness, she decided to teleport to
America to celebrate. However, not all was as it seemed. The Westboro Baptist
America to celebrate. However, not all was as it seemed. The Westboro Baptist
Church were preparing for the ‘Impending Apocalypse’ Of course, nobody knew
Church were preparing for the ‘Impending Apocalypse' Of course, nobody knew
about this yet, but it was pretty obvious what they were doing.
about this yet, but it was pretty obvious what they were doing.


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covered in rainbow puke.
covered in rainbow puke.


"Ahh, the most historic thing I’ve been alive to see. Well
"Ahh, the most historic thing I've been alive to see. Well
except for 9/11, but I was too young to remember that. And this is actually a
except for 9/11, but I was too young to remember that. And this is actually a
good event."
good event."


However, no matter how high everyone’s spirits were, The WBC
However, no matter how high everyone's spirits were, The WBC
were preparing to invade the streets of Washington to ‘Kill all Morons’ Did they
were preparing to invade the streets of Washington to ‘Kill all Morons' Did they
mean kill all cigarettes? That’s the word the British use for them. If only it
mean kill all cigarettes? That's the word the British use for them. If only it
did mean that.
did mean that.


All of a sudden, a massive tank appeared in the vicinity. It
All of a sudden, a massive tank appeared in the vicinity. It
had the letters ‘W.B.C’ marked on it in almost hyper realistic spray paint.
had the letters ‘W.B.C' marked on it in almost hyper realistic spray paint.


"YOU’RE ALL GOING TO HELL! WE NEED TO CONTROL WHAT YOU’RE
"YOU'RE ALL GOING TO HELL! WE NEED TO CONTROL WHAT YOU'RE
DOING IN YOUR OWN HOMES, AWAY FROM THE PUBLIC EYE!" A loud voice boomed out
DOING IN YOUR OWN HOMES, AWAY FROM THE PUBLIC EYE!" A loud voice boomed out
from the tank. It was Shirley Phelps-Rodger.
from the tank. It was Shirley Phelps-Rodger.
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Instead of taking the expected route of bombing everything, every
Instead of taking the expected route of bombing everything, every
member of the Westboro Baptist Church emerged holding their signs saying ‘God
member of the Westboro Baptist Church emerged holding their signs saying ‘God
Hates Morons’ and ‘God Hates America’ God, why are they being so disrespectful to
Hates Morons' and ‘God Hates America' God, why are they being so disrespectful to
Atheists? Why are they just a bunch of arseholes in general? Why are they all
Atheists? Why are they just a bunch of arseholes in general? Why are they all
inbred pricks who are doomed to fuck within their own church because they’re a
inbred pricks who are doomed to fuck within their own church because they're a
bunch of fucking shitheads?
bunch of fucking shitheads?


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shouted. The whole crowd cheered.
shouted. The whole crowd cheered.


But, as they died, we didn’t realise they had connected
But, as they died, we didn't realise they had connected
explosive devices to their body. The whole place exploded.
explosive devices to their body. The whole place exploded.


BT survived because she’s immortal, but many of the crowd
BT survived because she's immortal, but many of the crowd
were injured, or killed. The FBI had somehow managed to survive despite being
were injured, or killed. The FBI had somehow managed to survive despite being
in a 2ft radius of the blast. I guess that conspiracy about super soldiers was
in a 2ft radius of the blast. I guess that conspiracy about super soldiers was
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revenge was in order.
revenge was in order.


Hopping in the tank and replacing ‘WBC’ with ‘Taste the
Hopping in the tank and replacing ‘WBC' with ‘Taste the
Rainbow Motherfucker’ in rainbow coloured writing, and making the colour of the
Rainbow Motherfucker' in rainbow coloured writing, and making the colour of the
tank less grey and more Gay Rainbow Coloured, she set off to the Westboro Baptist
tank less grey and more Gay Rainbow Coloured, she set off to the Westboro Baptist
Church.
Church.


When she arrived there, she went inside and found a
When she arrived there, she went inside and found a
convenient ‘Self Destruct’ lever on the wall.
convenient ‘Self Destruct' lever on the wall.


"WHAT A TWIST!" She shouted, trying to imitate M.Night Shyamalan's voice.
"WHAT A TWIST!" She shouted, trying to imitate M.Night Shyamalan's voice.