CUPCAKE

Hello, my name is Joshua. I’m 19 years old and an avid Minecraft Bedrock Edition player. I received a shady Discord DM a few weeks ago with a Minecraft mod attached to it. The file was named “Cupcake.mcaddon”. I thought nothing of this file, so I downloaded it and checked it for viruses. Luckily, none showed up. At least, from what I saw.

Anyway, I booted up Minecraft right away, and imported the file to Bedrock to see what the mod could do. I started a world with the mod installed, and checked my seed. My seed was -6942021666, and, for some reason, mob spawning was off. However, cheats were also off. I wondered how it was, but I still shrugged it off. I got wood, set up some torches and a pickaxe, made sure I got a sword right away, and began to the caves. I started mining and placing torches in the empty dripstone cavern.

I completely stopped in my tracks when I saw it. What spawned right in front of me was a big red wither skeleton with a netherite helmet.. crown thing. It beared a Netherite Sword and had a yellowish-orange face. It wandered around a bit, staring at me. I placed a few torches to get a closer look it. And then I backed up.. oh I backed up. It was the worst mistake I made for that world. I backed up and completely stopped when I heard it make sound right behind me. I turned around, and a snippet of The Prowler’s from Spiderman: Into The Spiderverse played before I instantly left the world as the big, burly skeleton with the name tag of “Cupcake” stared back at me. I couldn’t shake off the feeling of that thing’s stare.

Well, I thought it was a little funny though. I then logged into my friend’s space roleplay realm and began playing WITHOUT the mod. A few people were on while I was, but that made it all the better. I walked around the facility for a little, and then I saw the red skeleton AGAIN. It ran head on towards me, MUCH faster than I could run. I lured it into a small, 1x4 hole and trapped it there. I looked at it through the glass above the room as it sat there. I went down the ladder and jumped a few times to make sure it was there. Of course, I couldn’t really see though. And I thought, “it couldn’t just climb out the hole THAT easily.” Sure enough though, I went into the next room to be greeted by a floor covered in EXP and the skeleton promptly named “Cupcake” barreling right towards me. In a matter of seconds I was met with the death message.

“JoshuaDaG was slain by Cupcake”

I rage quit the world as there was absolutely no way I could avoid this thing. I decided to just do my homework and go to bed.

The next morning I woke up bright and early, as I heard a ring on my doorbell. I wasn’t expecting any packages or whatsoever. I checked the time on my alarm clock. 6:09 AM. I went downstairs to see what it was. As soon as I opened the door, I was haunted to see the red skeleton in all of its glory, INCLUDING its helmet and overly-enchanted sword. It said to me in perfect English, “spread those cheeks” and sliced my with its gigantic sword. I instantly exploded into little, bloody bits all over the carpet. I am now a ghost creating this document to let you know the dangers of downloading random files. The skeleton then went up stairs to my $10,000 gaming setup. It downloaded Geometry Dash and, with such great speed and precision, dropped its sword and started playing Bloodbath. And yet, I live to tell the tale.

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