Da worst kweepypast Evah: Lincoln Latrouds trouble with Da Bois in Blue
Please Note: This is my first crappypasta meant to be the worst of them all in a somewhat hilarious tone making fun of other trollpastas and hope I get featured here. And someone please, add an image, categories, and make this protected, too. I’m new so I don’t know this stuff.
Anyone remember the classic show Da Laloud Mouse? The classic 2016 BicMoanDen cartoon was amazing. But I walked on De Epik Street and found a VHS which is amazingly in the title.
The theme song storted except it was slowed down with a creepy deep background voice and backwards with heavily detail on YELLOW NUBBIE MINNIE MOUSE MINNION BANANA BLUD1!! I touched it and It was real I was sucky 2 mah blood.
Then the title card came and I found it querid that Lincoln would get in trouble with the law but it was bloody and hyperrealistic!
The beginun stated with Lincoln wacin TV than Da bois in blue came! “Ah shit!” Lincoln said I was shocked it’s a KIDS shiow! “The cops are cumming! Ah shit! Ah shh-eat!”
“FREEZE!” Da bois in blue screamed! “Lincoln LaLoud is under arrest 4 attempted murder of da Cookie Mobstah from MineCRAP!” The family eas in extraordinary circumstances and difficulties of shock!
A giant red eye appeared I brushed it offf as de animation error. Eventually, the lights in my house went off.
The cop #666 said “Lincunt LaMood is arrested for kidnapping, dictatorship, crimes against humanity, nuking unkindness, genocide, human trafficking, torture, murder, public indecency, aggravated assault, theft, arson, domestic terrorism, terrorism, consumption of human flesh, parking in restricted areas, multipl attend to overthro the US government, unlicenseb carrying of nuclear weaponry, illegal drug use, war crimes, profanity (said "I wanna fuck and kiss a fucked up rat’s ass with shit all over it!" in front of a class of 80 preschoolers), hate crimes, etc. I can continue in da courts all day!”
Than Lincoln screamed while 27.83 seconds of static came and da giant red eye appeared. Soon da bois in blue went in their fun kar and came to jail which read in giant text “Da evilest pwison 4 da evilest vilinz” and a loud, hiqh dicked screech came.
The text kept getting bigger and the screech kept getting louder and moar migher bitched and my eyes and ears started bleeding yellow blud. Soon enough, da red eye appeared.
When he cummed in, sum evil madmab kept hitbib Lincoln with a pan and he was bleeding and a highly GRUCUM picture of him appeared. And I threw up enough 2 feed 25 whole armies!
“U think I’m wetawded huh?!” He said in response to getting repeaditky hit in da head. “Oh mah god! It’s a shitty trollpussy! U don’t have 2 fucking cricri wahwah over it!” Bleff Da Biller screamed loudly and acted like a maniac. The red eye appeared again.
Soon, Lincoln called his family his parents screamed “OH MY JESUS CHRIST LINCOLN WE H8 U AND WE GONI MURFRT U WHEN U GET RELELAD!” His siblings yelled “GRR!”
Then Lincoln host a GBNIFE and Lily says “Dats a GBNIFE, Lincy. YU should’vt be playplay wit dat. Y couldn’t hurt urself or others.”
The red eye appeared and took Lincoln away after he stabith him in da eye and da Iye was bleeding tears than Lincoln blue hin uo! BLUE HIN UO!
And Lincoln is tortured and preformed a surgery where all his blog, sweat, tears, memoriz, skin, burns, intestinz, organdy, and muscies are removaef while he was crying and squealing! It was all hyperrealistic and made me vomit again.
Lincoln DaTrump waz fucking ded his last words were “Oh noes!” While he was drowmqd the poil was BLEEDING! It showed a hyperrealistic picture of his dead body after everything removqw was aten and drunk by the red eye.
And then it said in Korean for 3 seconds “U r next I’m gonna KILL u Maxin Troythong! 666 STAB KILL DIE FIRE DEATH DEMON I WILL KILL YU AND DRINK UR BLUD DEAF TEH DEF HAD RISEN HAIL SATAN DIE” I don’t know I’m not good at names I mean it is mah real name! Ho did it know MAH name?! And a loud voice said “DIE!”
I beat and smashed da VHS with a sledgehammer burned it and threw it in the road. I called BicMoanDen and they said “Wut? How did u find it? The show creator Daverd has been slowly losing his grip of reality and has put his existential crisis into da daily funnies of Da LaLooods Home. And people by into this lie day after day.”
The next day, I was chopping veggies 4 dinnah and saw a Lincoln plushie holqng a BGNIFE! I screamed and slut its throat, put it in a box, fed it 2 a shark, fed it 2 a lion, and fed it 2 a tiger!
Then weeks later, my fat mailman “Bort” whose name is Bort? Came and threw me a package than disappeared in thin smoke which was da VHS again. I screamed!
I played it and saw another file simply titled “Bort” which just showed everyone in da show and VHS all dead except Lincoln who was flying around with demonic wings and hyperrealistic blood from his eyes and Sonic gave an evil laugh! Sonic swooped down and cut Lincoln’s head off wit a sword and gun hyperrealistic blud shit out everywhere and Sonic shouted “I. AM. GOD!” The screen went black for 8.532 seconds.
Suddenly, a GIANT BLOODY DOG version of Lincoln came crashing through the TV screen if da official BicMoanDen Studios and hit my head right off my body and I’m now dead! And my ghost wrote this! You are reading a story by a ghost and I am haunting you!
Look out da window. I’m outdoif da houd watching yu right now! EEEEEKKK!!!! Still, I wanna know wut da message meant…
…
Hello, Maxin Troythong, I’m here!
GRRRRRR!!!!! OK U FUCKING TROLLPASTA IDIOTS THIS IS WAR!!!! YOU BETTER STRIP PUTTING MY SCARY CREEPYPASTA IN TROLLPASTA WIKI AND BULLYING ME! I WILL WAGE WAR ON EVERY SINGLE ONE OF U EEDIOTS! I WILL NOT SYOP REPORTING U IDIOTS UNTIL UR ALL BANNED! WHO IZ WIT ME!!!! IRL I WILL BEAT U AND UR MEATS UP!!! I AM MAD AND I CHALLENGE DA OWNER OF TROLLPASTA 2 A TEXAS DEATHRUNMATCH!!!!! MEET ME IN DALLAS TEXAS NEXT WEDNESDAY I WILL WIN TROLLPASTA CHICKENBUTTFACE!!! WAAAHH!!!!
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