Da worst kweepypast Evah: Lincoln Latrouds trouble with Da Bois in Blue
This shit sucks ass. I'm the writer of this and regret it. I tried to be funny, but failed so fucking badly and made this unreadable. If you want to read it, you can, I'm just pointing out that it's heavily unfunny. The point in keeping this up still is to show people how to NOT make a Trollpasta and how I improved.
Warning: This kweepypasta ain't 4 peaple ages 11, under, and up
Any1 member the classic show Da Laloud Mouse? The classic 2016 BicMoanDen cartoon was amazing! I lived da shiow almost mah entire lived, but I won't bink of it da same woi again. But I walked on De Epik Street and found a VHS dat mead "Da LaLoud House Lost Episoad" which is amazingly in the title. I was an inten at BicMoanDen so I stoil it I meam I borriwed ut actualy it waz a giht dey gave me.
I plaid it at 3:00 A.M yes I know I doid 3:00 A.M! Don't complant or I'll cum to ur house and kill-ed you! The theme song storted except it was trowled down with a croopy deep background voice and backwords with heavily detail on YELLOW NUBBIE MINNIE MOUSE MINNION BANANA BLUD!1!1!1!1!! I touched it and It was rael I was sucky 2 mah blud.
Tren deh title card came and I found it querid that Lincoln would get in trable with the luw but it was bloody and hyperrealistic!
The beginun stated with Lincoln wacin TV than Da bois in blue came! "Ah shit!" Lincoln said I was shocked it's a KIDS shiow! "The coppers are cumming! Ah shit! Ah shh-eat!" "Y r u pissed bout da popo cumming?" Lincoln's mam "Adodedodedodedode" asked.
"FREEZE BITCH!" Da bois in blue scramed! "Lincoln LaLoud is unda awest 4 atented murder of da Cookie Mobstah from MineCRAP!" The family eas in extraordinary circumstances and difficulties of shock!
A giant red eye appneared I broshed it offf as de animeion ermar. Eventulmy, the lights in my house went off.
The cop #666 said "Lincunt LaMood is arrested for kidnapin, dictatorship, crimes aganst humidity, nuking unkindness, geneamide, human traficin, torture, murber, public imdecenmy, addbramated assault, theft, arzan, domestic terrorism, terrorism, consumption of human flesh, parking in restricted areas, multipl attend to overthro the US government, unlicenseb carrying of noclear weaponry, illegal drug use, war crimes, profanity (said "I wanna fuck and kiss a fucked up rat's ass with shit all over it!" in front of a class of 80 preschoolers), being a shitty liar, hate crimes, etc. I can continue in da courts all day!"
Than Lincoln scramed while 27.83 seconds of mastic came and da giant red eye opared. Soon da bois in blue went in their fun kar and came to mail which read in giant text "Da evilest pwison 4 da evilest vilinz" and a loud, hiqh dicked screech came.
The text kept getting bigger and the screech kept Bering louder and moar migher bitched and my eyes and ears started bleeding Melow blud. Soon enough, da red eye appeared.
When he cummed in, sum evil madmab kept hitbib Lincoln with a pan and he was blebing and a highly GRUCUM picture of him appeared. And I threw up ebuoghf 2 feed 25 whole armies!
"U bunk I'm wetawded huh?!" He said in response to getting repdickby hit in da head. "Oh mah god! It's a shitty trollpussy! U don't have 2 fucking cricri wahwah over it!" Bleff Da Biller screamed loudly and acted like a minaiac. The red eye opeared again.
Licant gwabbed a bat wit blud! "Weady 2 doy, Bleff? LOLZ!!" He asked. "FUCK NO! I'M NOT FUCKING WEDY TWO FUCKING DIE! FUCK U!!! GO FUCK AND KILL URSELF!" Bleff Da Biller scwamed.
Soon, Lincoln called his family his parents screamed "OH MAI GUS CHRIST LINCOLN WE H8 U AND WE GONI MURFRT U WHEN U GET RELELAD!" His siblings yelled "GRR!"
Then Lincoln host a GBNIFE and Lily says "Dats a GBNIFE, Lincy. YU should'vt be playplay wit dat. Y couldn't hurt urself or others."
The red eye appeared and tauk Lincoln away after he stabith him in da eye and da Iye was bleeding tears than Lincoln blue hin uo! BLUE HIN UO!
And Lincoln is tortured and preformed a surgery where all his blue, sweat, tears, memoriz, skin, burns, banes, treigns, intestinz, organdy, and muscies are removaef while he was crying and squaoelibg! It was all hyperrealistic and made me vomit again.
Lincoln DaTrump waz fucking ded his fast words were "Oh noes!" While he was drowmqd the poil was BLEEDING! It showed a hyperrealistic dickmure of his dad body after everything removqw was aten and drunk by the red eye which is shown in dis pic!
And then it said in Korean for 3 seconds "U r next I'm gonna KIL U Maxin Troythong! 666 STAM KILL DIE FIRE DEATH DEMON I WILL KILL YU AND DRUBK UR BLUD DEAF TEH DEF HAD RISEN HAIL SATAN DIE MAY DA DEF BE WIT U" I don't know I'm not good at names I mean it is mah real name! Ho did it know MAH name?! And a loud voice said "DIE!"
Something after da show ended made me jump out da window of mah 4th floor and run 2 da road 2 get ran over. In mindsight, I shouldn't've done dat. Butt, wut else? Da VHS waz over, yet da monster of it was still in my mind!
I beat and smashed da VHS with a sludgehamna boarned it and threw it in the road. I called BicMoanDen and they said "Wut? How did u find it? The show creaptar Daverd has been slowly losing his grip of realmity since da 2013 pilot and has put his exizemtal crisis into da biweekly funnies and lolz of Da LaLooods Home. And people by into dis leye day after day."
The next day, I was champing sum veggies 4 dinnah and saw a Lincoln plushie holqng a BGNIFE! I scweoned and slut its throat, put it in a box, fed it 2 a shark, fed it 2 a lion, and fed it 2 a tiger!
Then 3 welks later, my fat pailmab "Bort" whose name is Bort? Came ant 3:00 A.M and threw me a pockoge than disopoared in thin smoke which was da VHS again. I scweaned!
I plaid it and saw anatber file simply titled "Bort" which just showed every1 in da show and Lost Episoad including da red eye all dead excebt Lincoln who was flying around with demobnic wings and hyperrealistic blood from his eyes and Sonic gave an evil lauf! Sonic swoaped down and cut Lincoln's head off wit a sword and gun hyperrealistic blud shit out everybere and Sonic shouted "I. AM. GOD!" The screen went black for 8.532 seconds.
Den, Sonik gets in a epik fite wit Bleff The Biller, Slundermab, and EVILPATRIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXX! Da battel waz epik until soon, SHREK oppeared abd decapitated them with his onion breaf! And said, "Ah! Dey should've checked demselves before dey shreked themselves laddy!" I pissed mah pants and had a kidney failure!
Susbenli, a GIANT BLOODY DOG verzian of Lincoln came crazin frew the TV screen if da naficial BicMoanDen Studios and hit my head right off my body which caused an EXPLOSION which killed every1 including Shrek Bort and da bludy dog! I'm now dead! And my ghastl wrote this! You are reading a story by a ghastl and I am mauntbing you!
Look out da window. I'm outdoif da houd watching yu right now! EEEEEKKK!!!! Still, I wanna know wut da message meant...
...
Hello, Maxin Troythong, I'm here!
De End
GRRRRRR!!!!! I'M SO PISSED!!!!! OK U FUCKING TROLLPASTA IDIOTS THIS IS WAR!!!! YOU BETTER STRIP PUTTING MY SCARY CREEPYPASTA IN TROLLPASTA WIKI AND BULIMIMJ ME! I WILL WAGE WAR ON EVRY SINGLE ANE OF U EEDIOTS! I WILL NOT SYOP REBODING U IDIOTS UNTIL UR ALL BANNED! WHO IZ WIT ME!!!! IRL I WI BEAT U AND UR MEATS UP!!! I AM MAB AND I CHAIENGMEN DA OWNER OF TROLLPASTA 2 A TEXAS DEATHRUNMATCH!!!!! MEET ME IN DALLAS TEXAS NEXT WENZDAI I WILL WIN TROLLPASTA CHICKENBUTTFACE!!! WAAAHH!!!!
Written by Godlys
Content is available under CC BY-SA
| Comments • 4 |
Loading comments...
|
