Dafuckermonster

I AM EDDIE BROCK. I LIVE IN NEW YORK, IM REALLY BAD AT JOBS. I GOT A BOX FROM THE GIRL I ONCE LOVED, GWEN. IT CAME WITH A LETTER...

"BROCK, YOU LOSER!!! THIS THING IS EATING ME ALIVE. IT'S SOME KIND OF ENTITY. I'M WRITING THIS FROM THE HOSPITAL. SO I'M USING PROLOQUO2GO ON AN IPAD. THE BOX OF THE THING THAT EAT ME ALIVE IS IN THE BOX."

- GWEN STACY

WHY WOULD I OPEN SOMETHING THAT WOULD FUCK ME OVER? I WOULDN'T BE SO DUMB. THE BOX WAS A CARDBOARD BOX, AND THE ONLY WRITING ON IT WAS VENOM THIS WAS CREEPING ME OUT BUT I OPENED IT ANYWAYS... AFTER I OPENED IT, I FOUND OUT IT WAS... A BLACK CAT, I PLAY WITH IT ANYWAYS, I PULLED IT'S TAIL AND IT TURNED TO MY DESK AND STARTED SAY THINGS LIKE "COMMITING SUICIDE IS GOOD!" OR "PEOPLE ARE FUCKING IDIOTS"

3 HOURS HAVE PASSED AND IT IS STILL SAYING THINGS, LIKE "KILL PETER PARKER" AND "YO MOMMA IS FAT" IN FACT, HE'S NEARLY AT THE END OF THE JOTTER I WAS GIVEN BY MY FORMER BOSS. I THOUGHT SOME RANDOM GIBBERISH WOULD WORK, SO I SAID "BOOGA" BUT THEN HE REPEATED WHAT I SAID.

SUDDENLY, HE STARTED GRAB ME, RIGHT IN THE CROTCH, AND THEN IN THE TESTICLES. I WAS SCREAMING. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I HAD TO BADLY GO TO PEE, BUT THEN I COULDN'T MAKE IT IN TIME. I WET MYSELF. HE DRANK ALL OF THE PEE THAT WAS IN THE SMALL PUDDLE, AND SLASHED MY BUTT OFF.

I AM VENOM NOW, AND WILL BE FOREVER! I HAVE DEVELOPED IMMORTALITY. I AM OFFERING A MILLIONTH DOLLAR REWARD TO FIND AND KILL SPIDERMAN, AND STILL WAITING AND I'LL STILL BE COMING TO HIM.

Also, I need a new butt. Please donate to my GoFundMe.

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Originally on Geoshea's Lost Episodes Wiki

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