Dead with a Bleag: Difference between revisions

From Trollpasta Wiki
Jump to navigationJump to search
Content added Content deleted
VisualWikitext
m (Text replacement - "”" to """)
m (Text replacement - "’" to "'")
Line 6: Line 6:
666-666-6666
666-666-6666


That was a weird number, but I shrugged it off because I don’t have an attention span. After showing the number, a man said "Call this number to become an intern at Disney Channel Studio Thingy!" The man’s voice was kind of weird though. It was very low. He was probably a demon.
That was a weird number, but I shrugged it off because I don't have an attention span. After showing the number, a man said "Call this number to become an intern at Disney Channel Studio Thingy!" The man's voice was kind of weird though. It was very low. He was probably a demon.


I was very interested to become an intern at Disney Studios Channel Thingymajig, so I turned off the TV and grabbed my cellphone. I went to type in the number, but I forgot it.
I was very interested to become an intern at Disney Studios Channel Thingymajig, so I turned off the TV and grabbed my cellphone. I went to type in the number, but I forgot it.
Line 12: Line 12:
Dang it! I was so mad I threw it on the ''grouuuuuund''. It broke in half. I had wasted a $99 phone. Anyway, I turned the television back on. The episode had barely started. But it cut to commercial quickly. The number flashed back on the screen.
Dang it! I was so mad I threw it on the ''grouuuuuund''. It broke in half. I had wasted a $99 phone. Anyway, I turned the television back on. The episode had barely started. But it cut to commercial quickly. The number flashed back on the screen.


I grabbed my spare phone and violently pushed in 666-666-6666. The phone rang. It rang 6 times. Then it rang 6 more times. Then it rang another 6 times. That’s 18 times. Then someone picked up.
I grabbed my spare phone and violently pushed in 666-666-6666. The phone rang. It rang 6 times. Then it rang 6 more times. Then it rang another 6 times. That's 18 times. Then someone picked up.


"Hello," bellowed the demon-voice guy from before.
"Hello," bellowed the demon-voice guy from before.
Line 22: Line 22:
"Yeah homie."Man, I was COOL!
"Yeah homie."Man, I was COOL!


"OK. Drive to ‘Generic Spooky Cliché Lane’," he directed.
"OK. Drive to ‘Generic Spooky Cliché Lane'," he directed.


"Yuh," I slurred. Then I drove to "Generic Spooky Cliché Lane", got pulled over, beat-up by police officers, and parked my car in the Nickelodeon Disney Channel Studios parking lot.
"Yuh," I slurred. Then I drove to "Generic Spooky Cliché Lane", got pulled over, beat-up by police officers, and parked my car in the Nickelodeon Disney Channel Studios parking lot.
Line 36: Line 36:
The episode started out normally, as if anything weird was going to happen, right? HA! I laughed out loud in front of many strangers.
The episode started out normally, as if anything weird was going to happen, right? HA! I laughed out loud in front of many strangers.


Stan (he was the talking dog with a blog, like the title suggests) walked into the kitchen. He looked around with hyper-unrealistically CGI eyes. Then he shouted, "I WISH I WASN’T TREATED LIKE A DOG!"
Stan (he was the talking dog with a blog, like the title suggests) walked into the kitchen. He looked around with hyper-unrealistically CGI eyes. Then he shouted, "I WISH I WASN'T TREATED LIKE A DOG!"


There was slight chuckling from the people watching. Who has ever heard of a dog not wanting to be treated like a dog? I have. But that is not that scary so I won’t tell that story.
There was slight chuckling from the people watching. Who has ever heard of a dog not wanting to be treated like a dog? I have. But that is not that scary so I won't tell that story.


After Stan shouted, Tyler (a dumb teenage boy with what I think is a mullet) walked in and stared angrily at the dog. The mutt CGI closed his eyes sadly. His mouth formed a CGI frown.
After Stan shouted, Tyler (a dumb teenage boy with what I think is a mullet) walked in and stared angrily at the dog. The mutt CGI closed his eyes sadly. His mouth formed a CGI frown.
Line 48: Line 48:
But after this thought Tyler said that she was right. "You will always be a useless, stupid, pointless, dog."
But after this thought Tyler said that she was right. "You will always be a useless, stupid, pointless, dog."


This was the final straw for Stan. He managed to hang himself in 5 seconds. I couldn’t even see what happened, but I saw that he hung himself.
This was the final straw for Stan. He managed to hang himself in 5 seconds. I couldn't even see what happened, but I saw that he hung himself.


Avery ran into the kitchen and saw Stan’s dead dog body. She screamed because she loved Stan.
Avery ran into the kitchen and saw Stan's dead dog body. She screamed because she loved Stan.


"No!" She screamed. "I wanted to have dog babies with him!"
"No!" She screamed. "I wanted to have dog babies with him!"


Suddenly the lights of the kitchen went out. 5 stopwatch minutes later a dungeon came into view. Avery, Tyler, and Chloe’s arms were individually held up by bracelets. A secret tunnel opened, and a bloodied mutt came out. It was Stan.
Suddenly the lights of the kitchen went out. 5 stopwatch minutes later a dungeon came into view. Avery, Tyler, and Chloe's arms were individually held up by bracelets. A secret tunnel opened, and a bloodied mutt came out. It was Stan.


"Hello humans," growled a bloody Stan in a much lower voice. "As you can see, I am a zombie. But you know who can’t see?" Stan put his head back into the tunnel and brought out a man with a sack<sup>lol sack</sup> on his head.
"Hello humans," growled a bloody Stan in a much lower voice. "As you can see, I am a zombie. But you know who can't see?" Stan put his head back into the tunnel and brought out a man with a sack<sup>lol sack</sup> on his head.


"Your father can’t see." Stan’s timing was off, but when he removed the sack<sup>lol sack again</sup> no one cared. It was the whole family’s father, with his eyes scratched out.
"Your father can't see." Stan's timing was off, but when he removed the sack<sup>lol sack again</sup> no one cared. It was the whole family's father, with his eyes scratched out.


"And do you know what I’m going to do to you?" Stan CGI grinned. All the kids had sheer terror across their faces.
"And do you know what I'm going to do to you?" Stan CGI grinned. All the kids had sheer terror across their faces.


"I’m going," Stan began, "to endlessly tell you dog puns!"
"I'm going," Stan began, "to endlessly tell you dog puns!"


Everyone, including me, screamed.
Everyone, including me, screamed.
Line 70: Line 70:
"What do you call a frozen dog? A pup-sicle!"
"What do you call a frozen dog? A pup-sicle!"


"How’s your day been? Mine’s been kind of… RUFF!"
"How's your day been? Mine's been kind of… RUFF!"


The episode ended.
The episode ended.
Retrieved from "https://trollpasta.com/wiki/Dead_with_a_Bleag"