Digimon Adventure Abridged.exe
This is a parody of the original TV show. This is unfinished and I hope you enjoy this (this sentence will be removed when the story is finished). I will keep updating as I finish each section. Thanks for reading.
STORY
Chapter 1
Our stor started one day in the eighties I guess with our 17seventeen17 year old hero/villain Ken. He was playing hsi Zelda gae on his game boy when his older brother Sam got a strange message. “Meet me bithc” Was what the message said and Sam decided to be a idiot and go meet the person of the note. His name was Yukio Owikawa. Sam went to the coccer fidld and once there Owikawa shot Sam several times in the chest oh no. Then Ken later found out on the news and btched about it. Suddenly he found a computer that sucked him into it. Taking him into a strange digital orld. 113
Chapter 2
3Three3 digital wordl years later (which is about 18eighteen18 hours on eath), our true min charactr 18eighteen18 year old Joe was going on a date with a chick named Sarah. “Oh my goth don’t I look so good for the date?” Joe asked his older brother Jim who was looking at a picture.
“Sure thing mo fo.. Hey Joe... don’t get dirty. If you know what me men.” Jim said in response and Joe decided to listen to the waring. Then he left his house to dirve to the Srah house. Once there he got a boner over hot hot the Sear girl was. “Oh my digshit you look sho hit Joe.” Sar said and the two went to tehir date One at their date Sra was all like “Hey Joe, why you like ?”
“Because ur hot I guessa.” Joe said and then they wet back to their car after the date and dinnner nd hate hot sex. After the hot sec Sa was all looking at Joe worried of reactin.
“Joe we not can’t go out.” Sr told Joe and that made him cry like a pussy ass bith.
“Fe you ass hole tnen I will bagn outh ggirls.” Joe said and then S lefy the car to were Joe wnet to home adn foing father trying to cut himself.
“Ht thf uf au io trying to giv nt the power strem.” Joe asked his fathe rna dhis father killped his off aof rbeven suggeted int.
“of yiu mother fucking I will ith lspa hyou becouse yo en suggest that.” Joe fathr siad athen then fither btuc slap Joe super hard what the fuck he think.
Suden Joe left because he was hurt and didn’t wnat futher deal with. He rech cam of summer sinc it iummer and the house guy was all like “Joe you sta here the night it okay.” Joe a cepted offer and got a file of six people.
“Matt , Tai, Sora ,a, Mimi, Izzy, and short ass motherfucking.:” Joe read the files and saw that they all age range from 13thirteen13 and 16sixteen16. Afterwards Joe left the house and wnet to the cam place whe the other six were waitng for him 1. 369
Chapter 3
A fw minte ater Joe had found the group in their hosue doing frugh shit. Such as Mtt with knife, Tai with hakcky sack, Ixzzy truyong to break into goverment, Sora looking at magazines were with all mane and porn, Mimi talking to her fbrienf abou buff 50 yr ol guys and short guy being te norma one. “Oh my fucing penis you need to hget your shot togetrhr 1” Joe had demanesad angirly ad the group all screamed. Not because of him beut because of the wave 1. There was wave. There was a wave flying towards the group and they where all suced in like Hjounny Tsunami get it cuss that my favoyrt movie of all tim.
Whe grou wae up they ntced that they all had thses wierd gothic things that wer monster like. Sudeenly one of them start startspeaking it was a ndiosaur. “My name is Agumon and I am hilatrious and you will quote everything I say1. Matt’s emo wl that likes to cut himself is named Gabumon. Sora’s lesbian bird that gets off to lesbian porn like Sora is named Biyomon get it cuss both Sora an Biyomon are esbans. Izzy’s relaly smart ass busg that graudtated from harvadrd is named Tentomon. Mimi’s floery goddness that is really my girlfriend is anem Palmon. Joe’s anjoying as doghsot fish like thing taht sounds liek Jar jaAr MOTHERFUCKINGBINKS is named Gomamon. Then that shrt guys digimon athtw illl die by the one fourth point of the styr is named patmaon don’y get too attcehed to the, Now woth that pit of the way let’s get started on our hoes journey.” Agumon did the intorycductions as Tai looked at them totz confused. He didn’t undertsnad a single word from that.
“No no mesa stay. Mesa ggalled Gomamon. Mesa your humble servant.” Gomamon said and thn a red bug that looks ed like Scoprion from Mortal Kombat 2two2 howed up and forced teh group to a cliff were they jumped off ad suicided. Or did thsye1? 338
Chapter 4
Menahwle back with our hero Ken. In teh last three years he had grown a ful on beard and now has ten rings. One for each finger. During the three years he met his olw partenr named WOrmmon. “Oh my pop 3hwat is this?1”
“It’s me Wormmon I love pop tarts 1.” Wormmon said tna teht was whohw they teamed up. Once they teamed up after threw years they found a mine that was being worked on. Their leader what was named JewelBeemon.
“You will wrkk for me forevrr211’ JeewlebEbEemon said and taht wsd hwow they andslavry scareere sstarted with theat place. Kena dn WOrmmon worked very hard and over tim ahd makde up tehir promotions all the way to second in commaned behic JewleebBBEemon. It took a lot of time dodgjoist, and eforot to do it but it eventually happened.
“Hey this digimon is eing a bitch by trng t give me a jblowjob I not even bu lol. Anyways can you kile that mo fo for me you piece of sfilth.” JewlebEemon said and gave Ken a gun t kill the digimon taht was rejfecting.
ekEn had a very hard choice to made. He had two tug of war happen and he made a choice. “No VOLDEDMROT!1!”: Ken yelled and hsot the gun at JewlebEEmons bac severba times na dklled the eveil oer lord get it cuss teh great movie ever is named Robot Overlord Dylan and would agree with me right lol bithc.
“How ahboyt we part the vitsoyr?” Wormomn suggested and the grou and heroes working at the mine had a big mparty. After the pary they formed a group challed the feedo m firghters and the freedom fighters started to rebel against evil like the show Sonic the Hedgehog. 296
Chapter 5
Meanwhile with our much less interesting heroes for now, tehy where walking a long on the tbeach as if the previous events of the flicc breaking apart that they where falling pff of had never fucking happend. “I really wish I had some fun these days.” Mimi bitched loudly and looked at Joe. “Do you have a idea?”
“Don’t worry my love there will be plenty of lave latr for the bot of us.” Joe had told his new cursha dn the they found something that was all dogshit and wried. It was phone booths nest to the water edge. Not at all questionsing the position of them, the grouo each went to one except for the short guy who serves no purpose in teh first parts of this story.
“oh my sfucking hotline will the fuck wil l you answer 1.” Sora bitched while she was trying to call her mother who really loved her wven toygh shc e aws in fcking denail because you was a fucking teenager and all fucking teeagers are in denail bithc.
“I fucking quo my mother and father won’t answe the damn machie. Pr maybe it relaly liek Doctr who who really had a time lord machone and this is one of them holey shit they why I never confissdeed that.” Ta wai was statbf as he sa down net to Sora n closed this eyes for na and doghsot. Suddenly a dnoise taht happeend athat woek everytbody up from tehyr worset nightard. It was your father when yh egrounds no. No JK but for ireal it was sea monster.
“I love sea food.” Joe said and then tried to eat it and when he tried to eat it it hurt his eyes and ears but not his nose because his nose was fucking powerful like dogshit.
“That is eneogh.” Tai yelled and tried to fight teh sea monster but it brok his neck and he died. No not really but he did get thrown at a swall which was te ime more painful than having sex lol. Then Agumon couldn’t do it anynore. He was scacew igorr his anndsnaaritu. I mean snity but I am too laxy to retype that word.
‘AgUMON LASXT NEDSSS TO GREYMON!” Agumon yelled and shot out flaminthrowers from Diart Queen at the enmie and it worked like the sex ream that I had ast night. The sea monsetrs swam away because it couldn’t handle teh pur fucking awesome of flamsthrowers buregers.
“yeay that was our furist fucking battle 1. Now lets’ get hungry.” Izzy was saying as he was thiniung about the food they like “ I wasnt pizza.” He said and then a really lost Round Table guy showed up and tried to fidn the rigt delivery but the people lied because they where douchehbags and told them taht it was their order so they got to eat pizza the whole night like fucn and rdreams. 489
Chapter 6
That night there was trollye car and the group all nknew waht the fuck that meant. “Let’s have a strip poll party!” Matt screamed in excitement and everybody got naked as they had sex with the dragon from Spiro and then afterwards teh went inside the trolley car fro one reason. Jeremy Irons had told them to. There was s stripe pole and on the strip poel there was anotice that said ‘Sex me sex me.”
Mimi went first. She was oing the mecjagar. Matt went in di the Magic Mike danco off from the start of teh fucking movie. Then Sora did the dance that was in all those eroctic movies that made everybody honry and just couldn’t contain their lust for her. Even toygh she was a lgreat female lead as will be shown in the later bits of teh story. Tai did the monnwalk and when he reached teh pole he got fully naked and then rubbed his butt and back against the pole. Izzy opened his computer and rubbed it up and down the pole as he was recording it the whole time. Then Joe sis the Macarina and then after he did the macarina he found our a visio. “My dad knows teh secret to life.” He yiled and then before te short guy do santhing on that pole there was anther fuckin noice. It was s ea nskae.
“What the fucking flying horse dogshit. I thoyght e where dong to be safe for thet night but I guess I war wrong. Anytwahsu lets take care of it right fruclimg now.” Matt was saying and then he jumped on that snaea snake like fucking KO from Mortal Kombat ad then he was flung asidde like he didn’t matter which he really doesn’t.
“I will agnsget Gabumon to become Garurumon!” His partner yelled when they decided that they wanted to safe the day. Aftweards they defeated teh sea snale with their fucking frire cbreath like coller fro m freirzzer. Afterwards short guy looked at Matt and Matt looked at short guy.
“I hope you know how useless you are you fucking prick.” Matt said ad then left the short guy alone. He wanted to kill Matt so fucking badly it wasn’t even funny. But the group decided to retire for teh night ans sleep. Probably good for us because this is getting fuckin terrible. 398
Chapter 7
The next day the group was walking across a fucking desert like how I did when I was banging the universe. “jesus oh my go. This fucking sucks I want to get to a new plae bithces.” Mimi was saying and eveyetrhig agreed with her ever. Sudden;y Izzy had gotten a clue to were teh fuck Atlantis was.
“Wow that was epic.” He said as if he had watched a porn video lol. Thwat was when it happened. That hell go here go hell come go.
It was when they had found gothic village get it cuss im gothic and preps are scary as dogshit. The they say that thway babies were al over the place there. Oh get your fucking heads ot of teh fucking gutter not the babies that uhumas have coming oyt of their ass. i mean the babies like i digimon babies. Anyways the group taled to the birds and they all said that they served in the illuminati. “Oh my fucking goda the illuminati gave bith to me.” Sora as aid as and was as excited. Suddn there was attack. From torch human fantatic 4four4.
“Oh my fucking god I thought we weren’t going to do ayny ccross.” Mimi said as there was avideo being recorderd of them from the princiapla na of Pokemon Ranger Shadow and Of Alima.
“Guys lets follow the dende bat car.” One of teh baby said and they followed te like good kids and eventually reached the boat of the titanatic and they dhi thin there and then sudde happen. Humus Touch had reachd the boat and startef fire and then Biyommon had enoygh had.
“Byomn epicly fail to Birdraon an have pron.” Biyomon now Birdramon yelled and then tehy sho fre and dogdhit at the hu to and the defeated it becaue it was weak as ashit lol. Then th h t left the group and they celebreated their victory by eating shitty as your face food lol. Then tehy stayed teh night llol. 336
