Five Nights in the Muffin Man's Basement

So I was sitting in my house one day thinking about playing my favorite game Five Nights at Freddy's and then I noticed a boney looking man staring at me.  He was tall and slender.  I decided to follow him until I ended up in his house he told me to go in the basement so I did.  He told me to play Call of Duty Advanced Warfare but I refused so he had me to stroke his bone and then sent me to my cell.  The cell was small and had nothing in it he gave me a carrot and a toilet as well as a glass of water.  He told me that was going to be my only food so if I wanted more I would have to eat my own shit out of the toilet. 

Night 1:  The first night he was staring at me the whole time I wasn't able to sleep.

Night 2: He gave me a lovely looking flower I named Daisy.  Then managed to get some sleep.

Night 3: He gave me some rotting flesh to eat so I accepted and took it from him.

Night 4: He gave me some shears and I tried to pick the lock but he caught me and placed blocks in front of my cell so there was no escape. 

Night 5: He unblocked my cell only for me to see a bunch of cobwebs he said if I was able to get through them he would let me go.  But then I noticed I went in to his bedroom he tried to rape me but I ran toward the front door but it was no use he blocked it off.  So I ran back into my cell.

So it has been months since I have seen the Muffin Man I think he might be dead but even if this was true I wouldn't be able to escape anyway.  I decided I would have sex with the flower since it was so beautiful and I tried to make flower babies but for some reason she was getting pregnant.  More months passed and then finally I was able to break out the blocks where gone and I picked the door with the shears I noticed there was a cave in front of me so I decided to go into it.  When I got there I was greeted by the Muffin Man he told me I had to go to his rectum kingdom so he had me crawl up in his butthole and then I noticed a castle and the Muffin Man was standing in front of me he told me to go in the castle.  Then he told me I must find a key to talk to him in his office.  I found the key in a chest by some lava and took it.  When I found his office he asked: "What do you want most?"  Then I said "My freedom!"  He said very well and he told me to follow the path he was making so I did.  When I reached the end I was able to crawl out of his ass and ended up back in my village.  I told my flower I was going to marry her and take her to Paris.  I ran to my house and then went to bed.  The next morning a squirrel came to my house and asked if I was getting married to a flower I told him yes and then he told me that he knew a cat that would be able to host a wedding at his house so he brought over the cat and the cat made me follow him.   He called my wedding a special kind of wedding and he called me retarded but I didn't care I had my flower so I paid him money to host the wedding then we got married.  The next day I went to buy some potion from a local witch to impregnate my flower.  I went in then she asked what I wanted.  I said.  "Do you happen to sell potions to impregnate my flower?"  She said. "What that is the most retarded request I ever gotten people like you shouldn't breed!"  Then I gave her a lot of money and she gave me the potion.  Then she said:  "Here you go never return!"  I gave my flower the potion and got it instantly pregnant.  I decided to take her outside to give birth and everyone in the village was watching and staring at me while my flower gave birth.  When she did I named the kid Rose and then took them both inside my house.  I heard people shout: "What the fuck did I just witness?"  Then the next day I went back to the witch's shop to buy some plane tickets to Paris I gave her the money then rushed to the airport when I arrived they told me the tickets where faked so I went back to the witch sword in hand demanding real tickets.  I killed a local villager that got in my way.  Then she said: "I told you never to return now you got blood on my floor!"  I said "I demand real tickets or you will die!!"  Then she said: I will give you the tickets only if you get me some cocaine and more money so I went to find a local cocaine dealer and got some money I had saved in my house and went back to the shop.  She said:  "Good hang on while I get your tickets."  I heard her in the back sniffing the cocaine up and then she came back and gave me the real tickets.  I went back to the airport and went to Paris with Daisy and Rose.  I said look at the Eifel Tower it is beautiful.  She said: "Yes it is!"