Gummi Bears: Difference between revisions

 

Out of every 100 - Ah hell fuck it. I'm not going to have one of my wise guys tell you with their fancy fucking words and their fucked up bullshit. This time, I'ma gonna tell you myself. So here's the deal. My name is Sid Lemons (no I did not go on those fucking find people sites. I made it up. Why the hell should I tell you my real name?) and I've been a consumer of Life Savers Gummies since 1997 (I was born in 1992 mind you). Everyday, I would eat a single life saver, chew it up real good (except on Saturdays and special occasions. I'd eat the whole damn package. Literally). Yeah, I'm obsessed. So what? I love the taste. But especially that damn Wild Berries flavor. Yummy! I have been eating those ever since they came out.

 

So here I am, dead and dying (actually just dead but you know what I mean). The curse of the deformed gummi bears is real and true. I just wish I had more time to... well you know, get acquainted with you. I am a faceless ghost after all. I'll be watching you in this nice comfy package among my cousins or in your damn sweet bowl lying at the bottom relaying my voice and my very soul to your thick little head, resting on your kitchen counter or table staring at you while you sleep. But especially in your big juicy mouth or on your hot fiery tongue you swearing fuck. I'll be waiting to caress your taste buds, tickling your throat until you bleed...

[[Category:EVIL FOOD]]

[[Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck]]

[[Category:DIALOGUE!]]

[[Category:Excessive Profanity]]

[[Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG]]

[[Category:Old Shit]]

{{Comments}}