How 2 Write For Stoopids
This is another crappy trollfic in the guise of a so called critique written by a dumb troll named Eyesglowyellow who got banned as a result of her own bad behavior. Caution is advised
First off, I would like to say of all the absurd bullshitting TL;DR stories that this so-called weregrinch bitchaholic writes, that this is amongst the WORST. This is his best retort, how cute, So cute that it makes you puke butterflies and shit roses. But enough of that. I am going to help you to understand how to write better, through this finer example of STOOPIDITY. What is STOOPIDITY?
It is when a Tartlet Tard or a fucking asspie who thinks he is not human, gets together and writes things in their imaginary closet world, where no one can go but them and Rosie and her 5 sisters. Warning: Stoopidity works in GROUPS, who walk around and sometimes do not aware that they are indeed STOOPID. With that said, let's review, shall we? YES U!
TftW: The Storyteller's World
by ~DrMusic2-1 YES, this is who wrote this bullshit. This horrid, half-baked shitpie of lulz. We shall review his meager trolling behavior.
There once was a troll by the name of Eyesglowyellow, now he liked to write insulting stories about Nathan and his friends which wasn't at all respectful. <---This is a horrible beginning. Who the fuck writes shit that starts with a fucking sentence fragment, huh? Learn2write.
In fact his so called friends were just as horrid as he was especially Demongoat. WOW, it's so fucking convincing. I should laugh until my eyeballs fall out of my skull it's so fucking funny. Yeah…it's TL;DR. It's fucking SHIT NOBODY CARES ABOUT. It screams the mercy that should be felt because you know you have been totally PWN'D.
One evening while he was about to write -→anyother<---Learn2spell
insulting story using his retarded creation the absolutely disgusting Metokur Chimera, one of his books started hovering and glowing – it opened up on one of the pages and a swirling portal appeared and sucked him right into the book. Yeah RIGHT. It sure the hell sucked all right!
When he landed, he found himself in a world unlike any other – it was a crudely drawn cartoon world – in other words – it was from one of his own retarded stories.
In other words, he drew it, but with some help from his Tartlet Tard white knight, ugly Pikachu that we know as Rebecca.
"Where the hell am I?" He inquired.
"You are in one of your own stories." A deep voice responded from above.
"Who said that?" He asked.
"I did. I am the Storyteller. And this is my domain." The deep voice from above replied.
"What do you want?" He snapped.
"I've been hearing that you've been using your powers as a Storyteller for evil instead of good. Well this will not do in my world." The Storyteller responded.
'YOUR world? Ha! This is my world." He argued.
"Ah ah ah. You may have written those retarded stories but I have been around centuries before you were even born. I am the one and true creator of this world and the original Storyteller." The Storyteller responded.
"Meh. I don't care." He grunted.
"Well you should. Don't you know what happens to people who write horrible things about Nathan?" The Storyteller responded. SHIT NOBODY CARES ABOUT
The Storyteller then pointed towards several cages filled with people that had treated Nathan in a horrible fashion, one cage was labelled EDiots and had a bunch of Encyclopedia Dramatica readers who had been transformed into zombie-like creatures, another was labelled MetoTURDS and had a whole herd of Metokur members who had been transformed into animals and monsters in it, and a third cage which was empty but reserved for people who were truly evil.
Hey, Nathan is pretty evil, so why doesn't Nathan toss his own ass into that cage? HUH? Or maybe he needs some HELP.
"These cages are where people who treat Nathan unfairly end up in." The Storyteller explained. "If you're not careful, you could end up the same way."
"You're not going to put us in there are you?" He asked.
"Nooo…i've got something much better in mind." The Storyteller responded.
The Storyteller then got out a giant book and started reading it..
"Once upon a time there lived two little koalas. A boy one named Arnie, and a girl one named Lulu – Arnie was blue with brown stripes while Lulu was pink with yellow spots." The Storyteller said as he read the story.
Eyesglowyellow found himself suddenly changing, blue fur growing all over his body with brown stripes, his hands and feet becoming like those of a koala with two extra thumbs on each hand and his fingernails were now blackening and turning into long claws – same with his toenails too, his ears moved to the top of his head and became a koala's ears, his nose got bigger and turned black, and he grew shorter and stockier – as all his clothes fell off. He was turning into a cartoon koala, his expression of horror slowly changed into a more cheerful expression as he became more cartoonish.
GREAT, now he wants to make pornos. Can I die now? Die laughing, THAT IS. Hey, transform me into something useful, like John Holmes…LOLZ
His transformation completed itself as a sailor suit materialised on his body along with a hat to match. BECAUSE NATHAN HAS A TASTE FOR THEM GAY CLOTHES.
"What the?" He exclaimed. OLD NEWS, OLD LINE.
"You're a koala. And not just any koala, you are Arnie – who is one of the two main characters in this story." The Storyteller responded. "And it looks like Lulu is about to make her debut."
Marya found herself changing as well, as pink fur started growing all over her body with yellow spots appearing as well, her hands and feet slowly becoming like those of a koala complete with two extra thumbs on each hand, her fingernails and toenails also growing into claws, her ears moving to the top of her head and beggining to resemble those of a koala, her nose getting larger and turning black, she grew shorter and stockier and her clothes fell off and landed on the ground. She was also turning into a cartoon koala, her expression changing from one of shock and horror to a more calm and cheerful one as she became more cartoon-like.
Her transformation also completed itself as a red dress with light blue polkadots materialised on her body – with a little bow in her hair to match.
"Now Arnie and Lulu were on their way to Mr Gruff's house to cheer him up, now Mr Gruff was a grumpy miserly old goat who lived across the street." The Storyteller continued.
Demongoat found himself changing next as his hands and feet blackened and slowly became hooves, hair grew all over him, a small tail grew out of his backside, two long goat horns sprouted out of his head as his ears became like that of a goat, a 'beard' of sorts had grown on his chin, and his face began to push out into a more goat-like muzzle. Slowly but surely he was turning into a cartoon goat, and not just any cartoon goat – but a rather elderly one as well.
He grew older and older and older until he was almost 80 years old. When the transformation completed itself, he was now an elderly cartoon goat with a cane.
The older you are, the wiser you are, Nathan. I hope that Demongoat got wise enough to know how to properly kick your sorry ass. DURR HURR, I MADE HIM OLD NAO HE CAN'T HURT MEH
"Arnie and Lulu knocked on Mr Gruff's door and offered him some happy treats to cheer him up, but mean old Mr Gruff didn't want them at first, Arnie and Lulu convinced him to try some and he did – he thought they were scruptious and decided to share them with the neighbours." The Storyteller continued. "And Arnie and Lulu went back home to play. The end."
I fucking though this was THE END? Christ, do you know WHEN to end? You are stoopid. You don't put "THE END" until the END. Know how2end. That is why it's The End, you don't put shit after that, DURRR HUURRRR.
The two koalas Arnie and Lulu (formally known as Eyesglowyellow and Marya) went back to their treehouse and played happily together while Mr Gruff (formally Demongoat) sat in his rocking chair and sang to himself. Arnie's other friend Dennis the red koala with purple stripes (formally known as HOODEEDOO) was also up in the clubhouse playing.
And the Storyteller gestured that his job for the evening had been done – and that was all well knowing that no one would write any more insulting stories about Nathan ever again.
"You did a good job Storyteller." A voice cooed.
"Thank you, Nathan." The Storyteller responded.
Nathan the weregrinch, Andria the tigress, Sam the blue dog monster and Becky the 6'2 Pikachu monster all smiled at the Storyteller and said hello to their new friends.
As for Arnie and Lulu they lived happily ever after in their treehouse and later got married. Mr Gruff decided to open a daycare center after Lulu gave birth to her young joeys. MOAR SHIT NOBODY CARES ABOUT
The end. DOING IT WRONG. IDIOT, YOU ALREADY ENDED IT, LIKE, TWICE. Learn2Write STOOPID
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