How to See the Future

Do you want to know how to see the future? Welll here is how. First, take a battery. Any kind will work, but D-cell batteries work the best. Bite the battery, and drink the acid. Then, you should take a bottle of super glue. Rub the super glue on your fingers, and then quickly rip them apart. Then, go outside. Look directly into the sun for precisely 34:32:57. Congratulations! You have now just drank battery acid, ripped the skin off your fingers, and blinded yourself!

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