Interns

Yo. What's up homies. My name is Chinese, and I live on a boat. My only source of money is American welfare, so I thought, I need to get a fucking job. That's when I saw a job listing. "Intern At Nickelodeon Studios Wanted." Yes! I drove straight to Orlando. When I got out of my car, though, a man in a cloak stopped me and asked for $2,000 dollars and a stick of butter. I gave him his request, and he gave me a loanyard with my name and address on it. How did he know my name and address? I don't even know. Without finding it suspicious, I walked into the building.

When I walked in, I saw some graffiti all over the walls. A swastika, a dildo, and a pyramid, all drawn on the wall in what I thought was marker. I walked into a room that said "SpongeBob." I sat down in a chair after my new boss greeted me. That's when a disturbing episode of SpongeBob played on the television. It was called "Squidward's Suicide." When it finished, I puked. That's when my boss got a knife from inside the television and stabbed everyone in the room except me and him. I started crying. Then he said "you passed the test," and handed me a check for $3.76. I thanked him, and then I shit my pants and left the building.

THE END.

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