Jeni's Suicide (Pinkfong Wonderstar Lost Episode)
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NSFW WARNING
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I always love Pinkfong Wonderstar. "Why do you love it," ask you? Because its riffages and jokes are not like creator Seth MacFarlane's oldest cartoon, Family Guy, where it has cutaway gags! This show has more humor and it's awesome! It involves the prince of some unknown planet named Staria, Pinkfong, Hogi, a hedgehog who has nothing to do with Sonic, Poki, a inventor and mechanic, Jeni, a Olympic-like runner, Billi, a mean-ass rat, and a fuckton of other characters. Wait... why am I introducing you to the characters when you already know them? But what people didn't know is that there was a lost episode based on an American dysfunctional family.
I want everybody to know that I work at a McDonalds, home of the clown that every kid can fetish and one day be like him. I serve as a cashier at the place. One day, there was an extremely obesed man that probably weighs 500, yet he is still alive. He asked if he can have 32 Big Macs and 50 Quarter Pounders. God, I'm surprised he didn't have a stroke yet! And he took a dump over the floor of the restaurant with a VHS tape, which I guess was in his ass this whole time. And that's where the tape was.
With a tape in my hand, I left work without telling the boss, running to my $2 million apartment as fast as I can. Nevermind the McRib sandwich, I'm curious what this tape is about! As I got home, I looked at the VHS tape, and was typed in Comic Sans font as "PW SHOW #666: JENI SUICIDE," probably assuming that it is a lost Pinkfong Wonderstar episode. That must be awesome! I mean, I am a Pinkfong Wonderstar fan and I do believe there are a lot of lost episodes in real life. The weird thing is the picture. It's not really Pinkfong Wonderstar-related, but more of an unnecessary picture of Miles "Tails" Prower's testicles. I mean, this must be a prank or something. I took my time to put the tape in the VCR, rewound the tape since it was at the very end, and then, I pressed play!
The intro began unusually. We see the opening, but in a rap style, I mean, okay, nothing wrong with it, since I like old school rap from Limp Bizkit and whatnot. But then, they promote Mountain Dew soda. I'm guessing Smart Study and KBS wanted to air the episode with sponsorship by Mountain Dew. When we got to the end of the opening, Billi, who just popped out of nowhere was screaming, "OH MY GOD!" so loud that it shook my room. They then crash into the CIA building, dead.
The episode begins with Jeni in her house, unusually depressed. It looked like she was drawing Comic Sans "The Man" Hernandez on his paper. "Dinner time!" Hogi yelled offscreen. Next, we cut to outside Wonderville, assembling like hell. Jeni is at the table, crying, Poki looked disheveled, and Codi has a disgusted look on his face. As for Pinkfong, he looked disappointed, and there was black writing on Pinkfong's star accessory, Pio, that said, "PINKFONG IS GOD" in Comic Sans font. "You know, Hogi," said he, "It's such a great dinner. I may smoke my own cancer stick right now." Yeah, I guess it was okay, seeing as how the word, cancer stick, is slang for cigarette. "Dad, you shouldn't have called me a cancer stick." said Poki. "What did you say, I'm gonna fucking stab your eyes out!" said Pinkfong agerly, as he manages to grab a gun. Jeni then yells out of nowhere, "STOP KILLING PEOPLE! RECYCLE OR I'LL EAT YOUR BRAINS OUT!" Billi then came to the table, looking queasy, and having an unusual Scottish accent. "How about I eat my pecan sandies." he said while kicking Codi, sending him into the sun.
I was getting ready to shut the tape off, I mean, what the hell is this? This isn't the Pinkfong Wonderstar I know and love! Then, Jeni screamed so loud that her eyes became blood red. It sounded like Tara Sands, the voice of Jeni, was really screaming in terror, and not acting at all! Like nothing, Pinkfong said while this was going on, "I'm about to eat 576 tacos at Taco Bell right now." as he shoots Poki, in the most gruesome way possible. Then, we cut to Jeni, on the floor, dead, with modern day footage of 9/11 playing.
The outro credits play, and the words appear as I feared,
Play this fucking episode again, I will murder you and your mother.
You will regret the day that you made Grampu famous.
You will regret the day that you masturbate to Elmo porn.
You will regret the day that you work at McDonalds.
You will regret the day that you saw a fat man.
Get ready to die.
Sincerely, Miles "Tails" Prower
I shrieked as I ejected the tape. Who is Miles "Tails" Prower? Grampu from the show "Oobi"? Elmo porn, is that porn from Sesame Street ? I mean, what the fuck is happening?
I tried to shrug it off, I mean, maybe the Pinkfong Wonderstar crew was just pulling a prank. But then, I hear Jeni's cry, and I hear Tails yelling, "Cry now, bitch! I got my three testicles together." Could it be that there are people hiding in the refrigerator? Nah. Well, I opened it anyway. Oh my god! Jeni is tied on a rope! I tried to untie, but out of nowhere, Tails from Sonic X appeared! He said, "If you want to see a Judy wannabe in my house, you better start crying right now!" I froze. I don't know what to think at this moment. I was terrified that this was happening. I got strapped on a rope with Jeni, and pink skeletons pop out and say the number 576 for literally, 576 times.
Before I fainted in a coma, the last thing I saw was Tails, shoving his three testicles at me, and an American flag that looked like one, but different, popped up, and said, WE ARE WONDERSTARS, in Comic Sans font. And now you know that I lost all love with Pinkfong Wonderstar.
THE END! A RAVYN-WYNGBURD/ALEXJAKE14 CREEPYPASTA
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