Kentucky Fried Nightmare: Difference between revisions

I am the Extra Crispy Colonel, and my extra crispy $5 fillet is now 100% meat. Ooh sorry about that little sponsorship moment there, but I would like to take this moment to mention that I am in no way getting sponsored for this. Don't worry. You know the drill; my name is Buckie O'Buck Neil. I was a famous war hero during the Olive Oil War. Fast food agent Johnathan Maguire was meant to be recounting the downfall of KFC, but he's got a bad case of ass flu which he obtained after eating a spoiled bacon double cheeseburger from Jack In The Box. The les said about that place the better I say! In any case, if you don't know I work as the official mascot and spokesperson for the Rough Riders Chicken brand. It's basically an arcade where you can eat chips and con old men out of their hard earned millions by using a broom to sweep up the rewards. Times are changing. However, as a young man, I truly wanted to be Colonel Sanders. Mainly due to the fact that Rough Riders was nothing more than a cheap cash in on KFC. Don't believe me? Well if you were to zoom in on the Rough Riders sign by 100,000,000% you would see a tiny picture of Colonel Sander's local washing machine dealer.

 

 

Now believe it or not there is a reason I wanted to talk about KFC. I lied at the beginning of this masterpiece when I said that Johnathan Maguire had gotten ass flu, what really happened is that I threw a goose into Maguire's basement. Mr Maguire is very scared of geese, and the goose ended up chasing him around his entire basement which gave me Buckie O' Buck Neil the opportunity to steal his notes on KFC. KFC deserves to be talked about, and while it certainly didn't have quite as bad as a downfall as Burger King and Jack In The Box. There's still something there you should think about the next time you head into your local KFC. KFC killed my grandma's shoe shiner after he ate a Beefy Bap. KFC covered up the death very quickly by giving my grandma a 600,000 year old gemstone, but nothing will ever absolve them of their crimes. So if you excuse me readers it's time for din dins. I think I'm going to go help myself to a bonus bucket or maybe just maybe a nice little corn on the cob. Ooh yeah wouldn't that be something?

{{GLE|Bruno Tattagllia}}

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