Love for Life
Let me introduce myself, well, briefly. I live in wonderful California, in a small city near the bay area, every major city is at most one hour away. So I enjoy living here. I moved to America when I was three, still young, still weak, I wished I could have remembered it.
My childhood has been a mixture of things, good and bad. I never really had any major events in my life; I only went to one funeral, for someone I barely knew, so I never felt the loss of someone close. I should take that as a virtue, but I don't want to, for so long all through my life, I wanted to be normal. It's hard to say I have a normal life, well mostly. It's really hard to explain it. I wanted to experience what everyone else has already experienced; pure sadness, pure happiness, pure tranquility, and most of all, pure love.
A lot has changed from my child years to my teenage years. I hit a growthspurt, learned many new things, learned to love music, learned how to teach others my knowledge. I loved to do that. I loved to teach. I never wanted to be a teacher, I still don't want to be one. I just loved to share my knowledge and hope that it will change their lives. I love to think also, thinking now, I love a lot of things, but is it pure love? Sadly, no.
I'm a Christian, but I won't hate others of another religion, I have plenty of friends who aren't Christian. I am pretty much an average person. Middle class, 4.0 GPA, average everything. I grew up being a very shy child with very strange random bursts of courage which would often led me into making everyone laugh intentionally, or making me look stupid and making everyone laugh unintentionally.
I love to go on the internet, I know the rage comics, I am a gamer, I started playing since I was five. I am a brony. I dislike people who judge us when they don't even know us. I like to read Creepy Pastas, even though they scare me to death. What I hope to achieve in this one though, is to let others think about their life, and look forward to their future.
Moving on.
Okay, back on subject. I think a lot. It could be because I am a lefty, lefties are known to have more stimuli thus achieving a wider range of brain usage. I just think a lot, whenever I'm bored, I just think. All this thinking helped me understand the world and where we all stand. This is a harsh world. This population, this society. It's all messed up. I never wanted to live in this world, but I never ever thought about committing suicide.
It's just stupid. I've read one of Ghandi's quotes, "Be the change you want to see in this world." Although I know I can never do such change, I just hope some will learn something after reading this.
Look I don't want this to be a love story, but it's something I want to share to the public. So there is this girl, (yeah I know, but this will get a lot more awkward) I've known her since I was eight, and well, I like her and she likes me back, but we aren't in a relationship. Well moving on, we keep chatting on Facebook, but she would only be on at night, it felt like a secret or something. I've realized that I love her. I'm not sure if she feels the same, but that's ok, I usually get disappointed.
I never actually loved anything other than God, I never felt love to or from someone. Pure love is what I had for God, I never knew if I loved this girl so perfectly. I would stay up until 2 AM in the morning thinking about her. I would just think, think, think; thinking about life, my place in the universe.
Just thinking where I would end up. I love to read Jerry Spinelli books, they just help me think and reflect my life so much. One certain book told me not the worry about the future, learn from your past, and live in the present. I later changed it to learn from the past, live in the present and hope for the future.
I love many things, I love things with my life, but what I purely love is what matters, even if it doesn't last for eternity. I'm sorry if this seems just like a bunch of jumbled sentences, I'm sorry. I just needed to share my thoughts about life and love.
"In the end, we are not what we were, but what we strived for." -Book of Catastrophes.
For, Gena
Credited to Dowon7
Originally uploaded on August 5, 2012
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