Mustard's Battle With The TPW Admins In Australia
TheDudeWhoLicksMustard, who was now their Yandere-Sim OC, looked on in horror as her internet postie said the following:
- Xanthia.lua on Trollpasta Wiki has been deleted.
- Xanthia.lua Episode 4 - Fall Of The FNAF and JTK Fanbases In A Horrible Ending Note For An Equally or Infinitely More Cancerous Series on Trollpasta Wiki has been deleted.
- Xanthia.lua Vol E - The Crumble Of The Chinease Illuminati, The War On 33rd Wave Feminism, And A Subplot Involving Electromagnetism on Trollpasta Wiki has been deleted.
Since Mustard is a cook that ups herself and doesn't have any idea why quality control exists, Mustard skol a Red Bull and used her new ripper hyper-realistic anime angel wings to fly out of the window, seeking revenge in the dark night before instantly flying into a eucalyptus.
Meanwhile, SOMEGUY123, LOLSKELETONS, FurBearingBrick, Mai Sentry, SARDONYXXX, Skepolo, GodzillaFan1, and TotemUxie were raging on in a boozer for no reason.
"Man, 'member how crook it was when Mustard kept making those second banana joshes?" Brick asks.
"Yeah, and it was even more of a shit house when all she did was just mouth 'em differently." SG said.
"I still 'member those shitty little edits to the Sonic.exe doovalackies he made." LOLSKELETONS said and chuckled to himself.
Then all the admins got rotten.
Around 12:66 AM, the admins were still hitting the turps. LOLSKELETONS quickly heard something slamming into the fly wire and looks to his left, but all he saw were a couple of hyper-realistic feathers drifting downward.
"Yo, SKELETONS, what's up?" Godzilla asked.
"A bastard cockie probably just hit the fly wire." LOLSKELETONS said then passed out off his face.
Then a bloody hand planted itself on the window, startling Brick, who motioned for SG and SARDON to take a squizz. However, once SG and SARDON took a Captain Cook, there was just a smear of hyper-realistic blood.
"Wow Brick, I think you need to rack off the *hic* handles." SARDON said.
Then Mustard burst through the window, covered in blood, leaves, and twigs with an entire uprooted tree still snagged to her sailor suit.
"Ho-ho! Look who it is!" SG said, pointing at Mustard.
"I'm here to kil..." Mustard was saying and then passed out due to blood loss.
"Hah! Ripper, you little, Mustard!" Skepolo commented.
1:66 AM rolled by and Mustard was now concious again, and healed fully because Deus Ex Machina. All the TPW admins were stuffed off their faces at this point.
"I'M GOING TO KI--," Mustard was saying then noticed that everyone was asleep. "Hey, I'm supposed to cark you all in a blue because I'm some edgy, OP as fuck Mary Sue! Wake up!"
"We have enough of those already." Brick said and chucked back to sleep.
"I made sure of that." Said Sentry, stretching out and waking up.
Mustard then pulls out an M4A1-S | Hyper-Beast (Factory-New) and begins shooting innocent blokes because she's edgy af. The gunfire wakes up the admins, and they all piled into a War Rig (ofc there'd be a Mad Max reference) and chucked a yewy.
"YOU HAVE NOT STONKERED ME YET MEANIES!" Mustard yells.
Then the cops arrive. They all pull out glocks and aim them at Mustard. There were 15 of them. One of them began shooting, and Mustard charged at him, being able to dodge his bullets because she's an OP as fuck Mary Sue. She then proceeded to gouge out the eyes of the other officers with the glock, because that's how firearms work.
"So why haven't we banned this dipstick yet?" LOLSKELETONS asked.
Then, to make things interesting, Carl Sagan deleted Banium from the Bush.
"Well, I guess we have one option left." Skepolo said.
They all took out CS:GO weapons and grousely flew off into the air, leaving the War Rig to crash. They all returned to Trollpasta Wiki HQ which was in Melbourne for some reason.
"Fair suck of the sav! Have you guys seen JC-The-Hyena's new rant?" Godzilla asked.
"Yeah, I seriously can't believe he wrote a THIRD Sonic.exe!" LOLSKELETONS said.
"Should we add it to the Deletion Log Reffos?" Brick asked as she sharpened her claws.
"Nah, I think it's too kangaroos loose in the top paddock for Trollpasta." Sentry responded.
"Heh, remember how Mustard rocked up and started shooting at the fly wire of the hotel last night?" SG said, starting to giggle.
"And how she tried to wake us up?" Skepolo laughed.
"Man, that was apples." SARDONYXXX added.
"My favorite part was when the bludger just flopped through the fly wire and fell over. She was out for an entire fucking hour! She's about as useful as an ashtray on a motorbike!" LOLSKELETONS said.
Everyone laughed. Then the door at the end of the sleepout burst open. There, in the fly wire, stood TheDudeWhoLicksMustard.
"G'Day mates, would you like to play?" Mustard asked, taking a pommie shower.
"DON'T YOU BRING THAT SHIT HOUSE INTO THIS!" Sentry yelled.
"Alright, alright, no worries. DON'T FUCK WITH THE FOX!" Mustard said.
"NO FNAF FANFICS!" LOLSKELETONS said.
"Ugh, now I can't think a catchphrase." Mustard said.
"Don't you have somewhere to make a quid?" Skepolo asked.
"Yeah but I'm currently--STOP DISTRACTING ME!" Mustard yelled and pulled out her M4A1-S and aimed it at SG.
"I wouldn't shoot if I were you." Brick said, pushing an MP9 | Hypnotic (Factory New) against the back of Mustard's head.
Mustard quickly used her Mary Sue abilities to disarm Brick and dual wielded the M4A1-S and MP9. SG pulled out a Negev | Cali Camo (Factory New) and LOLSKELETONS drew his AUG | Akihibara Accept (Factory New) and they both aimed them at Mustard.
"Now now Mustard, we can do a piece of piss, or we can all be battlers here." SG said.
Mustard charged at LOLSKELETONS. Godzilla pulled out a MAC-10 | Neon Rider. LOLSKELETONS, SG, and Godzilla began firing, but Mustard dodged their bullets because 16 year old anklebiters can obviously move faster then 0.475 clicks per second. She slammed into LOLSKELETONS, but since LOLSKELETONS is a skeleton he just safely fell apart. Brick grabbed back her MP9 and started shooting too, but Mustard simply took cover behind the server that stored all of shitty Jeff rip-off tells as LOLSKELETONS put himself back together.
"If any of you keep shooting, these tells'll be cactus!" Mustard yelled.
The admins looked at eachother, then shrugged. Then Skepolo pulled out a Galil AR | Cerberus (Factory New), SARDON pulled out an AK-47 | Vulcan (Factory New), Sentry pulled out a Nova | Koi (Factory New), and Uxie took out a USP-S | Road Rash (Factory New). They all began shooting and the server containing the shitty Jeff rip-off tells carked it. After the dust cleared, Mustard was now holding A Wikia Contributor as a human shield. Again, the admins looked at eachother and shrugged. They opened fire again before Mustard could say anything, making A Wikia Contributor cactus.
"We needed to get rid of those hoons anyway." Uxie said.
"I'M GOING TO WRITE AN EDGY REVENGE TELL!!!" Mustard said and began to trek deeper into Trollpasta HQ.
"AFTER HER!" SG ordered, and all the admins began to follow as the Benny Hill theme started playing.
Since the admins were older then 16 they could only run at 0.34029 clicks per second, but still kept up with Mustard. The chase lasted 3.14159265 hours, and Mustard was finally cornered in the snack room, where she had bogged in a peanutbutter sandwich with peanuts.
"Finally that's over. That Benny Hill theme is hilarious, but it's humor gets bloody dry as a dead dingo's donger when it loops for 3 hours straight." Uxie said.
"Actually, the chase lasted fo--" Mustard was saying before being cut off.
"Mustard, Pi ain't that apples. Stop abusing it." LOLSKELETONS said.
"Let's just corpse the fucking dag." Brick said, aiming her MP9.
Mustard, despite having a gun, rushed at Brick with a knife, but before she could stab Brick, the knife sounded like it had no reason and dissapeared.
"Thank heaps for Such Words I guess." Said SG.
"Pig's arse!" Mustard yelled.
All the admins raised their guns and opened fire, but Mustard dodged their bullets and did Matrix-style Kung-Fu moves, sending all the admins flying to the walls. Mustard used her telekinesis powers and glued them all together.
"Ahh, we're rooted mates." Brick said.
Finally, Mustard made a cup shape with her hands, and belted out the words:
"Kame...hame....HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!"
She blasted the TPW admins with a wave of pure energy, incinerating them instantly. Mustard triumphantly struck a Ginyu Force pose because she had stonkered the level, and then flew away leaving a rainbow trail.
She was suddenly awoken by the sound of a door opening. In stepped SG, holding a bouquet of hyper-realistic orchids.
"So, how was the ambo Mustard?" SG asked and put the orchids on the nightstand next to her.
Mustard tried to talk but her speech was muffled due to the bandages all around her body.
"We decided not to ban you since that really went off." Brick said.
Mustard opened her eyes, having a Captain Cook at all the TPW admins in the bungalow. She looked at herself, sitting in a hospital swag, covered in bandages. Mustard frisked herself and felt the bullet wounds everywhere.
"Well, sit tight anklebiter." Said LOLSKELETONS as the admins did the harold holt from the room one-by-one.
And then, a skeleton popped out.
Written by TheDudeWhoLicksMustard
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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