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K, let me start off by saying that I am a HUGE CoD fanboy! I am a college student at ''Detroit's Interracial College (for) Kids.'' Now i'm going to tell you the events I witnessed known as Red Monday!
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Last Thursday I was fucking around with my friends, Reggie Fils-Aime and some other unimportant people. Then I saw this weird looking Call of Duty (which I'm a fan of btw) game sticking out of the trash can near my house. It said ''Call of Duty: Modded WarFail 3: Wrath of Gabe Newell: Resurrection: Erection: STD Infection: In Your Pelvic Section: The Movie: The Game: HD''. I got a nostalgic boner when I saw this and decided to invite my friends to my house to play it, but then I realised that I don't have any friends. I ran home and aggressively rammed the game into my E-Z Cracker. I sat down to play the game but a message popped up like a skeleton and said: "Warning, this game may or may not ruin your life and it may or may not set off a nuclear bomb and this warning message may or may not be legit. Do you want to continue?"
I pick yes but that introduction tho, it was wickity wack!!! It showed Fails from the Sanic series and Lucario getting
It was Soldier (remember him?) from tf2 getting
I thought "Didn't they mean ''Black Monday''? (its a weekly special they have at the local <strike>
The screen went blank with BIG RED TEXT (Basically the screen didn't go blank).
Before I knew it I was in the game, I was tied to the chair like Alex Mason (remember him?) there was a thing on my head that prevented me from talking but I was somehow able to scream. I kept screaming for da lulz until someone opened the door. The door opened and the shadow I saw turned into someone from Modded Warfail 3 (which i'm a fan of btw).
Someone very important.
Someone I knew.
Someone with a shet ton of swag.
Someone who was special.
Someone that could help me.
Someone i'm a fan of.
Someone I worship.
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He said "let's go, the roops won't be gone for long". I thought to myself, "roops? what the fuck are roops?, did he mean TROOPS?". 3 russians entered the room, Yaoi, Yiff, and Yuri and they gave me an intervention to do some elite quickscopez with. Then the entire room exploded (figure that out), the roops entered the room (that just exploded a second ago). Suddenly Gabe Newell (remember him?) entered the room (that exploded btw) and told me the release date of Half-Life 3, but I forgot it.
I forgot to check the back of the box for any weird shit that might happen. The real bad guy was Sweetwater from battlefield (<strike>remember him?</strike> nobody remembers the Battlefield campaigns cuz they're shit) (I also played this, just to let you know) I then figured out "wait a sec, this isn't any ordinary
"BOOM" said the truck, we were hit by a trickshotter, causing the me to be thrown out the vehicle. I woke up and saw Fluttershy getting
I woke up a while later tied up with glue on my mouth, HOLY SHET THIS JUST NOW BECAME 2SPOOKY4ME!!!!!!111!! All of my college friends were still alive except for Preston cuz I hate that asshole, fuckin douche. Macaroni then freed me and everyone else. But then
I was in hell, also known as Burger King, I was trapped in a cage. My friend were being slapped in the face with dildoes (Is that the plural for dildo?, it doesn't sound right). The guy who wrote deth trumpet was being fucked "in teh assholes" (he has more than one asshole) by deth trumpet and deth trumboen, Fluttershy was being fucked by TiaraWhy and Pokehidden. Some other guy was
I ejaculated the
{{by-user|Axe2TheMax}}
▲To be continued…'''Red Monday'''
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[[Category:TOTALLY NOT UNFINISHED U GUIZE]]
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