Sneep killz Doomblyhor: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 16:31, 7 April 2021
Hello, I know this may come as a shock and will probably disturb children, but you have to know the truth: Snape kills Dumbledore in book 6 of Harry potter. You probably know this, but alas, I did not when it was spoiled for me by my arch nemesis Doosh Bagg. When he told me this, I cried. I decided I would not read Harry Potter anymore because it was spoiled for me. It's been 3 years since then. I was moving out of my house and decided to let my old Harry Potter book collection stay at the old house, I didn't care about that shit anymore. I decided to go into my new house's basement and I realized my books were there and they were covered in blood. Did the moving-in people put them there? I went upstairs and deck the bastard who put them here.
Big mistake, going upstairs. The moving-in guy was crucified where my door should have been and the books were strewn on the floor. I pissed and shat in my pants. Book 6, The Half Blood prince floated off the floor and opened up. A disembodied voice said "read it". The voice echoed around the room infinitely, over and over again. I waited 3 hours for it to stop. It did not, it just got louder and shriller. I decided to actually read the friggin book so the voice stopped. However, all the words were replaced with "Snape kills Dumbledore!" I read the whole book, which was just those three words over and over again. I tried to run, but I was glued down. I looked up, hoping for a divine solution.
Everything was wrong. All the things in the room were replaced with Snape. Planet of the Snapes, Snapes on a plane, Snape Wine, A Roman Emperor with a vine of Snapes. The voice returned, but it was Allen Rickman's. He was saying "Potter!" in an angry voice over and over. My ears bled, I screamed and punched at the walls, but Allen Rickman's voice got louder. I can still hear it now. I'm hearing it as I type with bloody, bruised fingers as Severus Snape watches me, grinning at my anguish. I can feel my skin unravel. I'm tearing it off. Allen Rickman? More like Allen SICKman.
