The Curse of the Overcooked Steak: Difference between revisions

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m (Reverted edits by Awesomeness9528 (talk | block) to last version by SOMEGUY123)
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The story you are about to read is 100% legitnisslegit, I said so because I said so, fuck you.
 
My name is Nunya Bissniss. I am just your average 0.10239024202012 year old school girl who is obsessed with Hell's Kitchen. My only goal in life is to make it on Hell's Kitchen. To achieve this goal, I have prayed to the almighty god known as Gordon Ramsay every night, hoping that he will one day hear my pleads. Everyone at my high school has called me a crazy ass bitch because of it, but I don't care. I know that Gordon will come to me soon, and then I'll prove them all wrong.
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One night, I was sitting in my room, praying to my lord and savior as usual, when all of a sudden my sister barged into my room with a pissed off look on her face. "Nunya, what the fuck do you think you're doing?!" I heard her yell at me.
 
"Go away! Can't you see I'm trying to concentrate?" i said as i was rudly inerpeted by my fat bitch i call sister
 
"Concentrate on what? Being absolutely delusional?"
 
I gritted my teeth in frustration, "I am not delusional, you asshat!" I then proceeded to throw my rubber dildo with a picture of my god etched on the bottom at her face. I probably shouldn't've done that, because that just made her even more pissed off than before. I watched in horror as she walked over to my Hell's Kitchen DVD collection and stepped all over them with her Bigfoot feet. My heart sank all the way to my ass, and I cried tears. It took me approximately 69 years to get the full set of that glorious television show, and now all that hard work has been wasted.
 
"It's time for you to get a reality check," she stated as she grabbed my pubesarm and dragged me towards the door. However, she let go of me when she noticed that I had begun to glow a bright gold. I felt my soul within me resonate with a powerful desire for Hell's Kitchen. It was then I felt the presence of Gordon Ramsay behind me.
 
"No, I think it's time for YOU to get a reality check," the almighty Gordon proclaimed.
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"Oops, sorry fam." He apologized.
 
Holy shit, he had finally came to me. I was internally screaming inside. Alas, that internal screaming ended when I took a moment to analyze Gordon Ramsay's appearance. For some reason, he was wearing a Peter Pan outfit. To be honest, he looked fucking edgystupid wearing it, but I didn't care. He IS my lord and savior, after all.
 
"So... you've heard my pleads, right?" I asked my god.
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"Now, come with me, we have some business to attend to."
 
He grabbed my arm, which caused me to have a Vietnam flashback that Jinx would be proud of. Gordon quickly released it and instead took hold of my leg. We flew out the window causing it to shatter and towards the set of Hell's Kitchen.
 
When we were at the set, my heart was at maximum percentage of doki doki. At long last, my dream had come true. I looked around my surroundings, and saw a bunch of contestants standing in the far end corner. They looked like a bunch of filthy casuals. I strolled my way to them and stood in front of them with my hands on my love handles. I was ready for the task that the almighty Gordon Ramsay was about to bestow upon me.
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"I-I'm sorry, m'lord, I let curiosity get the best of me."
 
Gordon stood there for about 691337.420 nanoseconds, until he finally screamed, "DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU'VE JUST DONE?!! YOU HAVE DOOMED US ALL!"
 
I was confused for a moment, until I looked at the steak.
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"you... are... nothing..."
 
" crawling in my skin..."
 
"mega... faggot..."
 
I started crying tears uncontrollably. When the walls started oozing blood I went into the fetal position. This went on for what had seemed like hours until I heard a very loud POOF sound. I got out of the fetal position and noticed that there was a door right in front of me. I quickly got up and opened it, quickly regretting my choice.
 
Inside, there were spooky skeleton penises floating everywhere.
 
The skeleton penises noticed me and started shooting hyper-realistic jizz all over the place. I slowly closed the door and snapped my neck, thus killing myself.
 
However, I wasn't truly deddead. For I awoke a couple of years later out of that dimension and back in my world. Everyone was dead. The earth was severed into 21 pieces. I was in total disbelief.
 
But then, I heard a voice call out to me.
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