SpongeBob Squarepants: The Banana
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NSFW WARNING
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Author's note: My first "pasta" got taken down (Gen Alpha D-Day). Which doesn’t matter because it was a test.
Hi, my name is Pat. I work for a simple blogging company that documents lost media being found. Recently, my boss has been on a SpongeBob tyrade, as in he’s repeatedly trying to find SpongeBob media. It’s pathetic, I know. When trying to find more media, a Google Drive was sent to my email from one of my co-workers, a massive SpongeBob gigaleak. In many of the cancelled episodes and scrapped Flash games I had to go through, something caught my attention for the strange name. It read: "SPONGEBOB: THE BANANA" What the fuck had this been? What does a banana have to do with SpongeBob? After I had finished posting all of the leaks on the blog site, I downloaded the Banana episode to my personal computer, just to see what it was about. My computer loaded it, and the episode began. The title card music was seductive for some reason, Which in retrospect, I should’ve probably realized the innuendo, but I was tired from sorting all through all those files.
The episode started with SpongeBob walking to the Krusty Krab, with Mr Krabs updating the menu, while Squidward was just sleeping as the store closed. SpongeBob asked Mr Krabs: "Mr Krabs, What’s that on the menu?" Mister Krabs responded with: "SpongeBob me boy! I need you to look at me new special! The Super Sloppy Special!" SpongeBob asked: "How do you make it?" Mr Krabs then told SpongeBob he’d show him in his office, with a smug grin. Something told me this wasn’t gonna end well.. SpongeBob started moaning loudly while splurting sounds were played. Squidward looked disturbed as it all went down. Mr Krabs and SpongeBob walked out with SpongeBob looked drenched and Mr Krabs satisfied, with Mr Krabs stating: "And that’s how you make it!" He was holding a sloppy joe with cum and a banana peel mixed in with it. At this point I was intrigued, disgusted, trying to contain laughter, and so many more feelings. A lunch rush came to the Krusty Krab, as everyone was willing to try the disgusting sloppy Joe. No, seriously. Besides the disturbing ass process, it sounded disgusting in the first place. Anywho now, everyone ordered the Super Sloppy Special, meaning SpongeBob had to endure it even MORE. None of the customers cared, they just wanted it. A time card played stating: 5 Hours Later. SpongeBob looked FUCKING DRENCHED, SpongeBob also had a banana on his head, as he walked slowly to his house. Patrick was happy to see SpongeBob even yelling: "HIYA SPONGEBOB!" SpongeBob stared at him with tired, and battered eyes.
Patrick looked concerned and asked him if he wanted to go jellyfishing, SpongeBob denied the offer and said he was gonna go to sleep. When SpongeBob dozed off, he had a nightmare about a banana land, in which a bunch of bananas said: "HEY SPONGEBOB? WANNA SEE MY SPECIAL PATTY, STICK YOUR BANANA IN IT! MAKE THE SLOPPY!" after 15 seconds of this dream, SpongeBob woke up yelling, and ran out of his house with Gary in his hand. He broke into the Krusty Krab, pointing at Mr Krabs yelling: "YOOOOOUUUUUU!" Mr Krabs backed up slowly, saying:
"Calm down SpongeBob... There’s no need for this, it was a limited special! Look see!"
He tried to show SpongeBob the menu which removed the sloppy. SpongeBob placed Gary on a table, and slowly approached Mr Krabs, as he tried to reason. SpongeBob then charged at him, then Mr Krabs tried to run away but SpongeBob grabbed him and dunked him on the menu. SpongeBob picked up Gary and ran away, looking quite aggressive. Mr Krabs managed to squirm out and went into his office to scheme a revenge, which he settled on fucking brainwashing SpongeBob. Mr Krabs walked to SpongeBob’s house, in which there were muffled screams from. The next day, it seemed SpongeBob completely forgot about the incident, the brainwashing worked I guess. SpongeBob told Mr Krabs good morning, however, Mr Krabs looked blank, he still said good morning, but in such a monotone way it didn’t even remotely sound like he wanted to be there, Squidward said: "So.. Are we not gonna talk about yesterday?" SpongeBob and Mr Krabs gave Squidward a death stare. "Gee, sorry I asked." Squidward snarkily replied. SpongeBob and Mr Krabs looked at each other and told Squidward to come with them. The Krusty Krew walked to a secret room in the Krusty Krab, with a bunch of bananas. Squidward’s mind justifiably went into panic mode, as he tried to unlock the door in desperation, while SpongeBob and Mr Krabs tried to grab him and pin him down. SpongeBob repeated the words from his dream: HEY SQUIDWARD? WANNA SEE MY SPECIAL PATTY, STICK YOUR BANANA IN IT! MAKE THE SLOPPY!
SpongeBob’s eyes started to look like Mr Krabs eyes, which I will admit, kind of startled me. Squidward walked out with Mr Krab like eyes as well. Mr Krabs had told SpongeBob, go find the star, have him join the cult, continue the streak. SpongeBob had said: Yes Mr Krabs. SpongeBob had knocked on Patrick’s rock, and asked him for a date to the Krusty Krab. Patrick had asked him: "I’m not gay SpongeBob." SpongeBob aggressively threw the rock, and told Patrick: "COME WITH ME YOU FUCK. I WILL NOT TA-TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER." Patrick looked concerned and was about to yell, but then SpongeBob grabbed him and dragged him to the Krusty Krab, telling Mr Krabs: "I have him." At this point I was genuinely concerned. This was so strange at this point, like what the fuck was going on? "Calm down SpongeBob... There’s no need for this, it was a limited special! Look see!" He tried to show SpongeBob the menu which removed the sloppy. SpongeBob placed Gary on a table, and slowly approached Mr Krabs, as he tried to reason. SpongeBob then charged at him, then Mr Krabs tried to run away but SpongeBob grabbed him and dunked him on the menu. SpongeBob picked up Gary and ran away, looking quite aggressive.
Mr Krabs managed to squirm out and went into his office to scheme a revenge, which he settled on fucking brainwashing SpongeBob. Mr Krabs walked to SpongeBob’s house, in which there were muffled screams from. The next day, it seemed SpongeBob completely forgot about the incident, the brainwashing worked I guess. SpongeBob told Mr Krabs good morning, however, Mr Krabs looked blank, he still said good morning, but in such a monotone way it didn’t even remotely sound like he wanted to be there, Squidward said: "So.. Are we not gonna talk about yesterday?" SpongeBob and Mr Krabs gave Squidward a death stare. "Gee, sorry I asked." Squidward snarkily replied. SpongeBob and Mr Krabs looked at each other and told Squidward to come with them. The Krusty Krew walked to a secret room in the Krusty Krab, with a bunch of bananas. Squidward’s mind justifiably went into panic mode, as he tried to unlock the door in desperation, while SpongeBob and Mr Krabs tried to grab him and pin him down. SpongeBob repeated the words from his dream: HEY SQUIDWARD? WANNA SEE MY SPECIAL PATTY, STICK YOUR BANANA IN IT! MAKE THE SLOPPY! SpongeBob’s eyes started to look like Mr Krabs eyes, which I will admit, kind of startled me. Squidward walked out with Mr Krab like eyes as well. Mr Krabs had told SpongeBob, go find the star, have him join the cult, continue the streak. SpongeBob had said: Yes Mr Krabs. SpongeBob had knocked on Patrick’s rock, and asked him for a date to the Krusty Krab. Patrick had asked him: "I’m not gay SpongeBob." SpongeBob aggressively threw the rock, and told Patrick: "COME WITH ME YOU FUCK. I WILL NOT TA-TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER."
Patrick looked concerned and was about to yell, but then SpongeBob grabbed him and dragged him to the Krusty Krab, telling Mr Krabs: "I have him." At this point I was kinda creeped out. This was so strange at this point, like no genuinely, what is this? Patrick yelled at the top of his lungs as they had sacrificed him to the banana. Plankton had broken into the Krusty Krab, trying to steal the formula, as The Krusty Krew was almost done sacrificing Patrick. Plankton had snuck into the formula room to get the formula, and he was successful. Plankton looked at The Krusty Krew and said: "I have the formula... Whats the point of being bad anymore? Maybe I should use this power for good. I mean, these guys are clearly villains. And what if they find out. What would be the point of dying a villain? My journey is over." Suddenly, the formula opened up and said: "PLANKTON, YOU HAVE ONE WISH." Plankton had been thinking, when he decided. "I WISH I HAD A LASER GUN!" He suddenly got a laser shooter, which I will admit was pretty badass. Suddenly, Plankton kicked down the door and yelled: "COME AT ME YOU CULT PRICKS!" At this point, Patrick had been bananaed. Mr Krabs said: "You will fall like the rest."
The 3 slaves started charging at him, but Plankton had shot Patrick with the laser shooter, and kicked it at Squidward, then tripped SpongeBob, and grabbed the laser shooter. Mr Krabs started slowly clapping. Well, well Sheldon. Bravo, you defeated them. However, you will not have me fall. A sort of banana thing with a stabber grew out of his spine, and his eyes recoiled in his body, along with his face, and it was replaced with banana juices. His eyes were replaced with bananas. Mr Krabs shot the bananas at Plankton, who reflected it with the laser shooter, when he tried to pull the trigger, the ammo was replaced with water. Mr Krabs had started to chuckle, "YOU REALLY THOUGHT YOU COULD WIN? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH WATER?" Plankton looked conflicted and trying to think. When suddenly, he had an idea. "WELL BANANA BRAINS, TIME FOR YOU TO GET SOGGY!" Plankton started to shoot the water at Krabs, who was trying to pinch him, to no evail. Plankton had emptied the entire container on Krabs. He started to scream and resolved into a puddle, turns out his skin was also made of banana. Plankton decided to clean up the place and reopen it as The Krusty Bucket. It had become a success, as Plankton claimed Mr Krabs retired, and with the formula, Plankton could recreate it perfectly. It was a good ending. The episode ended, and my mind had been filled with many thoughts. To recheck if it was a real episode so I can post it on the blog, I emailed my friend who worked with SpongeBob in the past, here’s what he had to say:
"Hey dude, yes, that was made by a bunch of staff members having fun with inappropriate drawings, until they became a genuine story. Also, you’re welcome for the gigaleak. I convinced the team to give it to you relating to that email you asked for, so you’re welcome."
From, Jerry.
Let me say, me and my boss had a good chuckle about the whole thing. So yeah, that was the Banana. Weird episode, with badass and kind of wholesome ending.
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